Vent/What would you do? So fed up with my OB/GYN

megan.muffin · April 2011

I cannot wait for this baby to come out so I can move on and find a new doctor.

She was great in the beginning, super compassionate and ready to answer any questions I had. Now she is horrible. She acts like it's a burden to see me and like any question I ask is a stupid one. I'm sorry, this is my first pregnancy and I have questions.

I got a letter in the mail one day saying I needed to go see a specialist for an ultrasound due to a fetal anomaly and I had no idea what it meant; nobody had told me anything was wrong, at every appointment they said the baby was doing great and things were progressing just as they should be. I called to ask what the letter was about and what a fetal anomaly was and they put me on hold for half an hour just to have a nurse pick up, say "Something is wrong with his kidneys so you have to see a specialist," and hang up. I called DH at work in tears because I was terrified and he called them back, really angry and told them they needed to be more respectful to their patients and the answer they gave me wasn't acceptable and he wanted to know what wad wrong with his kidneys. They told him what was wrong and that it isn't that big a deal, but I was and still am irritated with how they handled everything.

Another time after I had blood-work done my doctor came in and didn't say hi, didn't ask how I was feeling but went into telling me I am severely anemic and my body is rejecting iron and the next words she said beyond terrified me. She actually said "You're iron is so low you may bleed out a lot during the delivery and possibly lose consciousness, if you survive labor you will need a blood transfusion." Of course emotionally unstable me bursts into tears because to me she basically is telling me I might die during labor and all she does is sit there looking at me like I'm an idiot for crying.

I want to change doctors so badly, but I'm nervous about finding a new one this late in my pregnancy. I don't know if it would be worth it to find someone just to have to explain the problems I'm having. Should I look for a new one, or should I stick it out and switch after the baby is born?

oh_maria · April 2011

Am right there with you, except both OB's I'm dealing with are terrible. One doesn't answer his night service and the other just says go to L&D and DO NOT leave a message.

I needed to get a medically necessary ultrasound for LO for his kidneys and the OB up here did not approve it. I had a script from the other OB and everything. Needless to say, I tried to move OB's, but alas, I could not.

I am working with them til delivery and probably up until my 6w appointment. After that, thanks for the baby and PEACE THE F OUT.

Now I just grin and bear it. As long as LO is safe and healthy, that's all I ask.

cdnvb4 · April 2011

Wow -- this behavior sounds unacceptable to me. How far along are you? If you still have 4-6 weeks until your EDD, I would make some calls and see if someone else will take you this far along. I can tolerate poor bedside manners, but the way she handled your low iron situation sounds like she has no clue how to deal with patients and this is worrisome for what could be a high-risk delivery.

GideonsMom · April 2011

I am not sure how far along you are, but most doctors and midwives will take you up to 36 weeks. I just switched at my last appointment because my doctor pulled this crap on me. I am back with the midwives I probably never should have switched from in the beginning. I hope you can find someone else to care for you because you do not deserve or need that added stress at such an important time in your life.

heikem87 · April 2011

megan.muffin:

Another time after I had blood-work done my doctor came in and didn't say hi, didn't ask how I was feeling but went into telling me I am severely anemic and my body is rejecting iron and the next words she said beyond terrified me. She actually said "You're iron is so low you may bleed out a lot during the delivery and possibly lose consciousness, if you survive labor you will need a blood transfusion." Of course emotionally unstable me bursts into tears because to me she basically is telling me I might die during labor and all she does is sit there looking at me like I'm an idiot for crying.
I want to change doctors so badly, but I'm nervous about finding a new one this late in my pregnancy. I don't know if it would be worth it to find someone just to have to explain the problems I'm having. Should I look for a new one, or should I stick it out and switch after the baby is born?

Wow how could she say something like that?? I mean I think as pregnant women we are constantly worried about something anyways and telling you this is just wrong. Think I would have biatched that lady out! Embarrassed You should definitely go and see another OB and let the old one know why you changed so maybe she wont do it to other women again.

AZ123 · April 2011

How far along are you? Is there another dr in the same practice? I personally would find someone else and switch.

megan.muffin · April 2011

I'm almost 34 weeks. There is another doctor and I saw her once when mine wasn't available and I just didn't like her. I'm just nervous about looking for someone new and not finding one I like in time

rainfallki · April 2011

With behavior like that, I'd probably look for another office now. If I found one I liked in time, great... if not, then at least I tried. But I think I would try.

I'm in a situation where I actually like my doctor, but cannot stand her office. It is impossible to get anyone to respond to you when you have a question. You have to leave a message and then *hope* someone gets back to you. I called because my feet started swelling (1st pregnancy, never been through this, and wanted to know what I should watch for and when/if I should start worrying) and I was going to be leaving town for a while - I was very specific on my message on why I was calling, what I wanted to know and the length of time I'd be out of town. I never received a call back.

Needless to say, I'm sucking it up and changing docs/offices after I give birth. In the meantime, if I have a question, I am NOT leaving a message. I'll pester the front desk staff or I'll just drive there and pester them in person.

cdnvb4 · April 2011

megan.muffin:
I'm almost 34 weeks. There is another doctor and I saw her once when mine wasn't available and I just didn't like her. I'm just nervous about looking for someone new and not finding one I like in time

It may be worth a few calls around. I think it would be difficult to find someone worse than your current doctor, so in one way, it should be pretty easy to find someone you like when you compare them to your current OB.

krispy127 · April 2011

OMG thats beyond messed up, I can't believe they would send you a dam letter about the baby's kidneys. And then the anemia thing plenty of people get anemic and it all works out fine. It sounds like she's the one thats freaking everyone out. All she has to do is be rational and explain things in a calm manor, I don't think your over reacting at all your OB sounds awful I would call the hospital where your delivering and see who else delivers there and who they recommend or try a birthing center or something. God the last thing you need is her freaking you out during labor and being all doom and gloom. Hope you can find someone else or at least deliver on a day someone is filling in for her lol

LoraLovesEddie · July 2011

I am 19 weeks and very frustrated. I am considered high risk due to my diabetes and my uterus. (placement of and condition of) I go to an office where I am tossed around between 3 different doctors and none of them seem to have time or will make time to discuss answers to the many questions I have. I go in for a 2:00 appointment and am not seen until almost 4. I ask questions and am told it doesn't matter when I know full good and well it does and just need some guidance. My hubby and I have a 15 (almost 16 year old son). We have had two losses and I was due after my 35th birthday to have a hysterectomy as the endometriosis has caused a great deal of pain and too much surgery. On my birthday I found out I was pregnant. I had been feeling badly for about a month and my hubby insisted I take the test. I had gotten to where I didn't like being near a baby isle, it was just too painful. It was positive!!! We have been fighting ever since to keep this little one alive. I had to ask to be put on progesterone suppositories as my body doesn't have enough to support a pregnancy. I was prescribed Bactrim for a mild urinary tract which I didn't and wouldn't take so to teach me a lesson my doctor waited a week to call me in a new Class B medicine and by then I was in pain from the UTI. I self manage my diabetes and keep it well under control but for pregnancy agreed to go on insulin as I knew my levels would be up and down and want to be safe. My dietitian (who deals in high risk) gave me needles that were so long they actually made my stomach bleed...and when I asked her to change the script acted like I was daft. I feel like the doctors who deal with exclusive high risk wont see me because I am not high risk enough...and the doctors I have been able to find don't take this pregnancy seriously. To me I am carrying a baby, to them he/she is only a fetus and if it fails no big deal...this baby means the world to me and I am at a loss as to how to go about finding a doctor that actually cares. Did you search for a new doctor or just stay where you are? We go tomorrow to see the baby via ultrasound and hopefully find out if we are having a girl or a boy. Thanks for listening.

Heather & Nayt · July 2011

LoraLovesEddie:
I am 19 weeks and very frustrated. I am considered high risk due to my diabetes and my uterus. (placement of and condition of) I go to an office where I am tossed around between 3 different doctors and none of them seem to have time or will make time to discuss answers to the many questions I have. I go in for a 2:00 appointment and am not seen until almost 4. I ask questions and am told it doesn't matter when I know full good and well it does and just need some guidance. My hubby and I have a 15 (almost 16 year old son). We have had two losses and I was due after my 35th birthday to have a hysterectomy as the endometriosis has caused a great deal of pain and too much surgery. On my birthday I found out I was pregnant. I had been feeling badly for about a month and my hubby insisted I take the test. I had gotten to where I didn't like being near a baby isle, it was just too painful. It was positive!!! We have been fighting ever since to keep this little one alive. I had to ask to be put on progesterone suppositories as my body doesn't have enough to support a pregnancy. I was prescribed Bactrim for a mild urinary tract which I didn't and wouldn't take so to teach me a lesson my doctor waited a week to call me in a new Class B medicine and by then I was in pain from the UTI. I self manage my diabetes and keep it well under control but for pregnancy agreed to go on insulin as I knew my levels would be up and down and want to be safe. My dietitian (who deals in high risk) gave me needles that were so long they actually made my stomach bleed...and when I asked her to change the script acted like I was daft. I feel like the doctors who deal with exclusive high risk wont see me because I am not high risk enough...and the doctors I have been able to find don't take this pregnancy seriously. To me I am carrying a baby, to them he/she is only a fetus and if it fails no big deal...this baby means the world to me and I am at a loss as to how to go about finding a doctor that actually cares. Did you search for a new doctor or just stay where you are? We go tomorrow to see the baby via ultrasound and hopefully find out if we are having a girl or a boy. Thanks for listening.

I find if very strange that this is your first bump post, and on a post that is a few months old, but whatever.

I am a type II diabetic, and that automatically labeled me as a high risk patient.That combined with your age plus your placenta I think you should really look into seeing a MFM. Idk if you insurance needs a referral or not to see them though. I have noticed that normal OBs don't really take diabetes quite as serious as MFM or Endo's do.

but even if there is no MFM in your area, you should feel comfortable about the person taking care of your baby and you. Start by asking around to see which doc people like. you can also try talking to the nurses at the hospital you plan on delivering at. You can also sometimes find reviews on doctors online.

You should expect to be seeing the doctor more often then if you had a regular healthy pregnancy, extra monitoring and extra u/s. As for the insulin, I always bled with my injections, and it is actually quite common.

There is also a high risk board that has lot's of helpful information.

hth

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