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March 2011 Moms
Major Meltdown (vent)
I just need to vent to anyone who will read! I had a major anxiety attack and emotional meltdown right now. I've worked myself up so much now that I can't go to sleep no matter how tired I am. This is my first week back at work and I feel like I can't do this. I can't keep up with my house, I feel like I don't spend enough time with DS, forget about DH. I feel like I never stop and can't sit down. I have so much resentment building up towards DH. I feel like I'm alone in this parenting world. I feel like DH has put other things in higher priority then his family. While I am awake getting things ready for the next day, trying to pick up, take care of the dogs, and put DS to sleep, DH is already asleep. He doesn't wake up with DS at night, how in the world can he be so tired. Hate is such a strong word, and I LOVE my husband to death, but right now......the only word I can find is hate. I hate that my husband doesn't help and right now, I just feel like I hate DH.
Thank you ladies for letting me vent!
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Re: Major Meltdown (vent)
I am a SAHM and I know how you feel using the word hate. I have said that at times myself. The best thing I can suggest is a chore chart and a sit down talk with your DH while someone else watches your LO. Chore chart helps me even while I'm SAHM to look at my messy house and say "well that doesn't get done until Friday" and only do spot cleaning and whatever is on my "list" for that day.
*hugs*
It gets better though. I promise. I swear for the first 3 months or so I was in this haze and I finally snapped out of it and felt more like myself and like I had things under control.
I could have written this post myself! I will go back to work in 1.5 weeks, and I bet all hell will break loose again.
I finally just realized that I can't do it all... some things will be left undone. I'm SO OCD, but I just have to let go.
This week has been better than the first 6, so I can only hope things will turn around.
What bothers me the most is that I really just miss my DH. I miss that he used to take care of me and put me first. Now, it's like he wants nothing to do with me or LO and just thinks about himself. Every time I confront him, he says it's just me being an emotional wreck and I don't really mean what I'm saying. YES, I MEAN IT, THAT'S WHY I SAID IT!
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