do/ or did you ever catch yourself sitting once again, at home alone wanting to be back with ex. Its been about a month and a half and sometimes I just want to go back to how it was... I want my family back. I want life to go back to how it was... I miss him. I know i shouldn't, i should not want to see his lying, cheating face... i should want better for myself, but right now all i want is a txt or a call from him... i want to pretend i never found out he was cheating and just have him again. I feel pretty pathetic when i sit here typing this... but today i just cant seem to shake these thoughts and feeling.
SN- i think its been hard lately bc we still do activities together with our daughter... he comes to her dr appts then we will do lunch together, he came today to get her ears pierced with me, and he is coming tomm to her pictures. and we have a good time, but then he leaves and i know he is talking to all his other "girls" while i sit alone and lonely...
Re: feeling weak today
You miss your dream. I understand that. You are still going through the stages of grief because you are grieving the death of your dream. You sound like you are negociating.
You need to put an end to the stinkin' thinkin'
You shoud replace the thoughts with thouhgts that empower you. What worked for me, was I taught myself to knit. I watched online videos and followed along and I created a "scarf". I still have my first scarf. It's really ugly. But what you can see is transitions. From the beginning where I wasn't anygood at all to the middle where there are dropped stitches and mistakes but you can see it coming together and the end where you can tell I finally got the hang of it and the stitches are nice and even. It took me a week, a couple hours every night for a week.
But in the end of my work I created something. By my self. It was empowering.
That year everyone I knew got scarves....and hats! The next year, they all got sweaters. This year I made a lot of baby hats and I've started selling them. I made a couple hundred dollars which was nice to have extra.
The point is you need to focus on something that empowers you! Learning and mastering something new is a really good feeling. There are you tube videos on how to do everything from how to cook spagetti squash to how to replace the transmition in your car.
Joanns' fabics, AC Moore and Michaels all have classes/in store demos for free or low cost from knitting- cake decorating. Loews and Home Depot every saturday has an in store class/demo too.
You can do it. I believe in you.