D.C. Area Babies

Two steps forward, one step back

I really thought we had maybe turned a corner with LO's screaming/crying, but today was awful again. Pretty much nonstop screaming from 10 am until 7 pm except for when he ate and for the short periods of time he'd doze off after eating. I had a migraine, too, and basically spent the day in tears because i was so frustrated. He has had a few good days recently so I know they can happen. I am just so tired of having to constantly soothe and console and bounce and still having a crying baby. He hardly ever smiles and has never laughed. He never even looks happy or calm, just always somewhere between serious and furious. My parents won't even babysit him because they've never seen him not screaming, and I honestly wouldn't inflict him on anyone else I care about, and I'd be too scared to hire someone I don't know. The times I have taken him out have been disastrous and have caused me so much stress that I've given up trying. I've actually lost so much weight from the constant walking/bouncing that I weigh 10 lbs less than I did pre-pregnancy, although I am so fatigued and stressed that I look awful. I really hope he gets happier soon because this is making me and dh miserable.
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Re: Two steps forward, one step back

  • Sorry to hear that.  It will end soon though.  They say colic usually lasts 3-4 months, right?  I know it's probably a lifetime for you.  I dont know if you looked into this or if any other moms that have/had colicky babies have, but have you looked into probiotics at all?  I know I've read some things that some people claim they help with colic.  Who knows for certain, but I imagine you're probably desperate enough to try anything at this point.  Maybe something to ask the pedi?

    Good luck, hang in there.   

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  • I'm so sorry. Have you talked to the pedi about this?
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  • Defintely talk to your pedi.  Colic is usually not screaming/crying all day for days upon end.  Colic *usually* has a finite period associated with it - ie, every day from 3-6 pm, etc.  This could be reflux or a food intolerance or something else.  Do you wear him at all?  It might help - it helped with DD #1 (she had reflux and was MSPI). Being upright helped with the reflux and she just liked being near me. Hang in there and get a break when you can.  It will get better, I promise!!
  • I'm so sorry!!! I hope the few good days you've had are a sign that a change for the better is on the way. You should talk to your pedi though and see if they can look into this further. Wasn't J on a reflux med? maybe changing it up would be worth a shot?

    And if you want to get out for a date with A (or even by yourself!), let me know. Seriously. I will come babysit for you, and you don't need to worry about sending me running for the hills with the screaming because we've had plenty of that in my house. :)

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  • I am so sorry and hope that you find a solution so you can all get some rest and do some smiling.
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  • I was posting from my phone last night, but now I'm at my computer so I can type more. M was an extremely fussy newborn and also a screamer, but even at his worse, he only screamed a few hours a day, not all day long. If your LO is truly screaming all day long and seems miserable 90% of the time, then I'd wonder if there's something going on medically. Does he spit up a lot, and does the spitting up seem to bother him? Does he have any signs of a food intolerance/allergy, like unusual BMs? Is he sleeping ok? Could he be overtired/overstimulated?
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  • First off {{{{hugs}}}} - it feels like it will never end, but it will. 

    I'm trying to remember what meds you have said he's on - is it Zantac?  Has the ped. considered switching him to Prevacid or Prilosec?  Zantac is pretty darn mild and treats the symptoms of reflux (lessens the extra acid) rather than treats the problem (minimizing the amt. of acid produced) - if I remember correctly.  I threw everything I could at T to lessen her pain because the screaming was driving me mad - half a dose of Mylicon every two hours, probiotics, Prevacid, we eventually added in Maalox periodically.  Stopped eating onions, broccoli and all gas-producing vegetables entirely because it really did make a difference for her.

    And if nothing else, I remember plenty of days strapping T into her swing and going outside to the end of the driveway where the screaming was quieter, because I had done everything I could do and it wasn't doing us any good to have me cringing and falling apart while holding her.  You do what you have to do to get through the hard times, especially when you're in a lot of physical pain.

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  • I just wanted to add some stuff from my post below. At one point, DS was crying for 18 hours a day (in a crazy moment I timed it). The pedi insisted over and over that there was nothing wrong. In hindsight, he probably had silent reflux, EXCEPT for the fact that after his 12 week growth spurt he magically became a different kid. DD has silent reflux and had all of the same symptoms as DS until we started treating her for it. If you have had a few days in a row that were good, you are close! Do you think he is hitting that growth spurt?
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  • Oh dear, I'm so sorry.  As I know I've posted to you DS was like that - hours on end like that.  I know exactly how it feels. We ruled everything out - reflux, heart problems - etc. and ended up on soy formula thinking maybe it was a dairy sensitivity.  But the fact is we still don't really know, as he did just get "magically" better over the course of a few weeks.  (though we're still on that soy, too nervous to switch him at this point).

    Hugs to you!

    Wife, Musician, Fed, WW-er, and Mom of three little kids - not necessarily in that order.
  • **Hugs** It is so hard. Neither of my babies screamed by themselves that long, but there was a period of time when one would stop and the other would start, so it was continuous. DS was particularly fussy until we got the right formula (Gentlease). Have you been trying new formulas (if you're FFeeding)?

    It can be so hard. Don't be afraid to put him down for a few minutes. I'd even try bringing him in a dark bathroom, with the tub faucet running, and put him in a bouncy seat. That helped my LOs when they were extremely fussy.

    They do get better soon. Around 3.5 months, my LOs started crying less. I remember around 3 mos, DS still hadn't smiled yet b/c he spent so much time crying. I was convinced he'd always be unhappy and that something was wrong with him. At 3.5 months, it stopped and now he's so smiley and happy (although he is still the more sensitive of the two). So, your LO will get happier--it will just take some time.

  • I am so, so sorry. I can't even imagine how  hard that is. I know it probably doesn't help to hear it now, but I promise this will not last forever. At some point, hopefully sooner rather than later, he will turn a corner.

    I also agree with the PP that if there is reflux, don't hesitate to start Prevacid. It really helped us. Also, have you watched the Happiest Baby on the Block? Some of those tricks are really effective. 

    Good luck!

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  • since you were so helpful the other day in my post about my fussy DS I wanted to let you know what our pedi said this week.  for us, DS is just overtired, and the fact that he is really hard to get to sleep (and stay asleep) during the day makes him even more grouchy as the day goes on.  the solution is basically do whatever we can to get DS to sleep more often.  we're supposed to try soothing him to sleep after only an hour or hour and a half of being awake, even if he isn't looking sleepy.  DS also wakes up often during naps after only 20-30 minutes and we're supposed to try and just soothe him back to sleep unless he's clearly hungry. we're trying it out today and it's hard!  it was a real struggle to get him to fall asleep at 9:30 (took til 11:30, but now he's been asleep for 30 minutes without tossing and turning, my fingers are crossed).  the pedi also said things even out around 3-4 months old, so hopefully you'll be turning the corner soon. 

     i completely understand how heartbreaking and frustrating it is not to see those smiles when you know they're in there somewhere!

     

     

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