Three uncles but can only have two godfathers

SethandMelissa · April 2011

DH and I are raising the babies Catholic. DH is atheist and isn't a huge fan of this but it's something we agreed on well before even getting married. Now it comes to picking godparents and in Catholicism, you can only have one male and one female. Problem is, DH has two brothers and I have one brother. No sisters, not even a sister-in-law. How do we pick? All are close in age and important to us? Agh.

tink7227 · April 2011

We don't have this problem, but I have seen people put the potential godparents names into a hat and draw a name. It's crazy, but I guess it worked for them. Good luck choosing!

airforcewife331 · April 2011

I'm not Catholic, but the way we are chosing Godparent's will be that they are the people we want raising our child if something were to happen to us. If you look at it like that, would that help make the decision? I don't have any sisters and my only sister in law is in Korea and I've never met her so my child's Godmother is my best friend. (we've been friends since we were 3 years old and I would trust her to raise my child even before my husband's brother--who he wants to name Godfather).

krissywags · April 2011

I am having issues with choosing godparents also but I am baffled as to the fact that you can only have one male and one female godparent. I am Catholic and I have two male and one female godparents... nowhere have I heard that you can only have one of each.

melaniedel · April 2011

We are Catholic, too. The Godparents (in the Cath. religion) are someone who are practicing Catholics that are responsible to help guide your childs religious beliefs. I have five sisters and brothers, but we decided to ask my Mother and his Father (since they are responsible for our faith). What about something like that?

brockli · April 2011

We are in a similar situation. My sister is already DS's godmother so she's taken care of. So that leaves DHs siblings for this baby. Well he has 2 sisters and 1 brother plus 1 sister is married. Not going to lie I have a favorite sister so she is my choice but then the question is do we ask her husband because they are married or is it alright to pick my bil because I would prefer to ask him.

Sorry I'm no help I just wanted to let you know I'm right there with you.

To the pp that said they have 2 godfathers. I do as well but I think that is something the church has changed. My godparents/guardians aren't Catholic so the church required someone Catholic so my grandfather was also my godfather. I think they have changed it though.

StefandTodd · April 2011

You're certain the church won't allow you to have two godfathers for one of the boys?

I ask b/c (granted this was a VERY liberal catholic church) I'm one of FOUR godmothers for my BFF's son. She also has twin boys, and each of them have four godmothers, no godfathers. Then again, she is atheist, her wife (yes, same sex) is catholic. So yes, very liberal church. But it's what worked for them and the priest was agreeable and supportive.

alubins · April 2011

I have experienced a similar situation to pp's. I am Catholic, and my godson & had 2 godmothers (both Catholic) & 1 godfather. There weren't any issues with there being 2 of us at my brother's church. I'd ask your church if it's possible to have more than one because they may allow it.

SarahPLiz · April 2011

Could you just pick a friend and not pick a family member at all?

iteachk · April 2011

We were in the same situation. We were raised Catholic, DH has one brother, I have two, and no sisters. Two of the brothers go to church every Sunday, and are just generally good role models. We chose one of them last time, along with a good family friend for the godmother. This time we'll choose the other one. If we have a third child, we'll choose the other brother, but if not, it's not a big deal to me.

Are you sure you CAN'T have two (or three) godfathers? My mom's BFF chose her two best friends (both women) to be her daughter's godparents. She is Catholic as well.

Good luck!

festivus · April 2011

One of my nieces (Catholic) has two godmothers and no godfathers. Check with your church/priest before ruling out the possibility of two godfathers for one of your children.

BK33 · April 2011

airforcewife331:

I'm not Catholic, but the way we are chosing Godparent's will be that they are the people we want raising our child if something were to happen to us. If you look at it like that, would that help make the decision? I don't have any sisters and my only sister in law is in Korea and I've never met her so my child's Godmother is my best friend. (we've been friends since we were 3 years old and I would trust her to raise my child even before my husband's brother--who he wants to name Godfather).

This.

Matt Dvorak · April 2011

StefandTodd:
You're certain the church won't allow you to have two godfathers for one of the boys?
I ask b/c (granted this was a VERY liberal catholic church) I'm one of FOUR godmothers for my BFF's son. She also has twin boys, and each of them have four godmothers, no godfathers. Then again, she is atheist, her wife (yes, same sex) is catholic. So yes, very liberal church. But it's what worked for them and the priest was agreeable and supportive.

That's awesome! If my church had been like that, maybe I wouldn't have been turned off by it. I grew up in one of the most conservative diocese in the country.

cate42807 · April 2011

In a smiliar boat, but I thought that Gpdparents had to be Confirmed Catholics as well- which is a problem because we really don't know any other confirmed practicing catholics except ourselves (even my brother was never confirmed!). I am planning on going to the "baptism" class our church requires but Ive already had a friend ask about it...

Skibunny07 · April 2011

airforcewife331:
I'm not Catholic, but the way we are chosing Godparent's will be that they are the people we want raising our child if something were to happen to us. If you look at it like that, would that help make the decision? I don't have any sisters and my only sister in law is in Korea and I've never met her so my child's Godmother is my best friend. (we've been friends since we were 3 years old and I would trust her to raise my child even before my husband's brother--who he wants to name Godfather).

You do realize that Godparents are not meant to be the people that take your children if anything happens to you right? They are meant to be someone who will act as a spiritual guide for your children if you are unable to do so. Your will would indicate who would raise your children if anything happens to you and I would hope that you would indicate all the same person (where as godparents are usually different people for each child, like in my family, I'm one of 4 and all four of us had different Godparents).

aliska · April 2011

I'm Lutheran...like Catholic light. We have three brothers too. I think we're going to go in order of age (oldest first). Luckily we want 3 kids.

For godmother, we are going to choose his cousin who is very close to us. The middle of the three brothers just got engaged, and we are somewhat close to her...so that might work out for 2nd kid. And I'm sure we'll find a stranger on the street for our 3rd.

Want a personalized experience?

Three uncles but can only have two godfathers

Re: Three uncles but can only have two godfathers

Choose Another Board

Search Boards