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2nd Trimester
babybuckley
member
Pissed about my dr appt today
babybuckley
member
I am 11 weeks, so only a week or so away from this board, but I figure you ladies might have more insight to my question/rant than the first tri board.
As soon as I got the positive test from the dr, they referred me to an OB. I saw her for the first time last week and I liked her a lot. She was very nice and down to earth. She told me that she was going to order an ultrasound and some blood work done but that she couldn't do it herself because the particular Dr office I have, "prefers to do lab work and ultrasounds themselves". I thought it was weird (not to mention inconvenient to have to go to 2 drs for basic pregnancy related stuff) but I went along with it.
So today I had my ultrasound at my reg Dr office. Upon arrival, I was informed that the person performing the ultrasound was not a dr, so my husband could not come in the room, nor could I see the monitor, nor could she tell me anything or give me any information whatsoever about my baby or the ultrasound. What the hell?????
I was quite pissed but I had to pee so bad I just needed to get it over with, so I went along with it.
I guess she sensed my disappointment, because after she was done she "bent the rules" and turned the monitor toward me so I could see. I was so glad that I got to see but still so disappointed that my husband couldn't. And he was extremely disappointed as well. This is a first child for both of us so we were really looking forward to seeing our baby and hearing the heartbeat. There was no sound at all during the u/s btw, so I didn't get to hear a heartbeat.
She then informed me, just so I would know when we come for the 20 week scan, that he wouldn't be allowed in for that one either, but could come in after it was over and see the pictures. I have never heard anything like this and I am totally pissed! I plan on raising all kinds of hell on the phone over the next few days because I'll be damned if my husband is going to wait outside while I find out the sex of our baby and he gets to only see only still shots after. His place is by my side in that room and I can't believe they expect couples to put up with that.
And really,, what the hell is the point of sending me to an OB that you are not going to let do anything other than deliver the baby?
Has anyone else had to deal with this? What did you do? What would you do in my situation?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Pissed about my dr appt today
i agree with pp's...total crap. i have never heard of your SO not being allowed in the room during an u/s -whether a doc or tech is performing it. doesn't make any sense.
I understand your fustration! I would be very p***ed off as well about not being able to have my significant other in the room as well to see the ultrasound... and also, not being able to see it from start to finish!
The going to another place for the ultrasound doesn't sound to different. My OB doesn't do the ultrasound's at his office neither. I have to go over to the radiology department at the hospital to get mine done, but fortunately the hospital is in walking distance from my doctors own office building.
I had my first ultrasound at 9 weeks and I also did not hear sound. The machine they used that day doesn't pick up sound, but my OB had also told me the previous day at my appointment that I would not hear the heartbeat till 12 weeks along any how.
I'd hate to see you lose the OB you seem to like, is there any way you can keep the OB physician and just ask that your ultrasound/blood work be done else where, since you feel you weren't treated the best at that Dr's office. I'd defiantly make some calls and voice your opinion about your significant other not being able to be present in the room that's bull!
Thank you all for your comments. I felt it was wrong all along, but hearing others say their experiences were different (read better) than mine, makes me sure I got a bad deal.
If they don't change their "policy" after I raise hell, I will change dr's. I just started at that dr this year, so it's not like I'm attached. I will tell the new dr that I already have an OB I would hope they will be ok with me keeping her.
You only have you first u/s for your first baby once, and they have ruined that experience for us. I'm pissed off and extremely disappointed.
I'm an ultrasound tech and I have some thoughts about some of the statements you made. You probably won't like what I'm saying, but hey...I don't like what you said either.
"Upon arrival, I was informed that the person performing the ultrasound was not a dr." Yes, we're not doctors. We're Sonographers, trained medical professionals who image babies, livers, kidneys, gallbladders, uterus, ovaries, check for blood clots and tons of other things.
I'm not sure why your husband couldn't come in the room, usually they're allowed, I can see why you're mad about that.
"nor could I see the monitor" Actually the person who should see the monitor is the Sonographer, she or he is going to have to tell the Radiologist (the doctor reading the image) if you baby is ok or not.
"nor could she tell me anything or give me any information whatsoever about my baby or the ultrasound. What the hell?????" We're not doctors, we're Sonographers. Legally we have to have a doctor read the images before we tell you results. We're not trying to be mean....this is a legal issue.
"And really,, what the hell is the point of sending me to an OB that you are not going to let do anything other than deliver the baby?" A lot of doctors can't scan u/s. Its a lot harder than it looks, Sonographers make it look so easy. I think its fairly common to have at least one ultrasound done by a Sonographer.
I'd also be dr. shopping.
My dr. doesn't do u/s either but a tech in the same clinic does. While she can't tell me much she'll let anyone in the room with me, let me see and give us pictures. The results then go to the radiologist and back to my OB ASAP so he can explain anything.
In my first pregnancy I had some major medical issues that required a hospital u/s like pp mentioned and while I couldn't see they let H come back with me for support.
Two things - 1 - the sonographer who posted is right- I've been to two practices in academic centers, and I always have a sonographer do the exam, and they are definitely not allowed to say anything. A radiologist (or maybe the OB) reviews the images at the end of the appointment and sends the results to the OB. It's standard! They're great! -2- the whole part about not letting you see and not letting your husband in is crazy. A good US facility has it's own monitor for the sonographer (which they do, as she said, need to have a good view of) and and 2nd monitor for you and the father. So switch doctor's offices or do whatever you want to have the pregnancy experience you want, because you should.
Going to a different office for an Ultrasound is no big deal. Its pretty common. However, my husband is more than welcome at any pregnancy related appointment or scan I have. This is his baby too.
As far as bedside manner, that is something you can raise hell about. At the perinatal center I had to go to for our NT scan and Spina Bifida follow up Ultrasound, the sonographer had a monitor, but they also had a monitor on the wall so I could see whatever they were seeing. For our AS yesterday, the sonographer turned the monitor so both she and I could see it. Your doctor should understand that to you, these are more than simple medical procedures. You have an emotional attachment to your baby and want to see it to strengthen that bond. If the doctor or sonographer can't support that, then you need to find another practice that is more interested in taking care of the whole woman, not just the baby.
This is totally crap. I have gone to the hospital and external imaging center for u/s - my scans are never done by an OB (although the hospital OB does sometimes come in to take a look after it's been done). My husband is always allowed (we can actually bring 2 people if we wanted) and the tech does tell us if everything "looks OK." That's not giving a diagnosis - it's just telling you what they see. Then they go and have the doctor look at it to confirm that there are no concerns - so again, they're not overstepping their scope.
I would find a new practice ASAP.
That is CRAZY. I am high risk and not only will my husband be there for ALL my ultrasounds, but I can bring our toddler too if I want. Honestly, my OB requested I bring in our daughter because she thought it would be cool to have her help her find the heartbeat and talk about the baby.
I get the tech not telling you about what they see - but for your DH to not even be in there is absolutely insane. Say goodbye to that practice.
DMoney will be a kickass big sister
I have had 2 ultrasounds - one for baby and one for previous medical issues. In both cases, the screen was situated so that we could both see it - we being me and the tech for the med one and me/hubby and the tech for baby one. The patient has a right to see the screen and I would never go to a practice that felt otherwise.
You need to find a new doctor/practice ASAP. The father has every right to be there, and you both have every right to see YOUR baby.
Lastly, on my medical u/s (non-pg), they could not tell me anything, but for baby at 8/9 weeks she showed us everything - that is the head, etc...and told us everything looked great. Showed us h/b flicker, etc...and let us "hear it" though I know that is a mechanical thing. She made a DVD of the whole thing, h/b sound included and gave us some pictures.
I am so sorry that this place ruined this experience for you. However, your 20 week one is the "big" one so find a new place that will treat you properly and enjoy the heck out of that experience
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.
Are you in Canada? From what I've read, it's pretty common in some provinces to not allow others in the room and to not allow you to see the screen, especially prior to 12 weeks.
As for the "sex scan", the bigger concern is whether you'll be getting news of a potential disorder or issue with your child without your husband there to support you. However, it sounds like you're covered on that as the doctor will tell you the results and your husband can be there for that.
When I've had ultrasounds done by techs, the techs have told us very little, though they have let me see the screen. They're simply not allowed to tell you much and your doctor is supposed to give you the results. They have been really generous though with printouts (when they had a printer) and very nice about letting us ask for printouts. When I've had then done with a peri, I found out everything immediately, which is really nice.
If you're unhappy with the way ultrasounds work in this office, talk to your doctor and find out if this is the way it always works in that office. Depending on your insurance and location, you most likely have the option to switch to someone else if you're unhappy.
I agree with everyone else that what happened to you was total crap. My insurance requires me to go to a special radiology place and I have had 3 u/s so far. For all three of them, my DH was in the room and an active participant.
For my early u/s at 7w the sonographer looked around for awhile and then had the radiologist come in and do the internal one and talked my husband and me through everything.
For the 20w u/s the sonographer showed us EVERYTHING. The monitor was on, and she pointed out everything she was looking for (4 chambers of the heart, nucal fold, spine, kidneys, gender, etc) Once she was done she had to actual radiologist come in and he looked around. He relooked at some things like the heart, my placenta, etc, and then sent all my information over to my OB. We also got a done of pictures, videos, etc.
I would recommend calling your insurance and finding out exactly what the policy is on where you go for u/s. It is very possible that they will cover you going to an actual radiology center, rather than a dr's office.
But if I were you, I would not have my 20w at that place. Do some research and I am sure you will have a much better experience else where.
I'm so sorry for your experience- that sounds so frustrating!
To clear up one thing, my "what the hell????" comment was more directed to the fact that my husband wasn't allowed in. I understand that she can't tell me anything because she was not the dr. But I still don't understand why that meant my husband couldn't come in and I couldn't see the screen.
About the tech being the one to need to see the screen, well duh, but i assume most offices have a set up that allows the tech and the expectant parents to both see the screen.
And to the person who asked about Canada, nope, southern California.
After taking the night to sleep on it, I am even more upset. I feel like we were robbed of a moment we had been waiting for since we found out we were pregnant.
I will be making some calls and if I don't get anywhere, I will absolutely be changing drs before my 20 week ultrasound.
Thank you all for your support!
My blog: Midwest Chaos
I have always had a sonographer and they always point out the head, spine, fingers, etc. You know, the simple stuff. My H is always allowed back. My DS is not, though. Heck, he ins't even allowed in the building. My place has a screen the sonographer looks at and then they have a TV above where I am so, my H and I can watch.
OP, I would call your OB and doc and find out what the deal is and I would switch docs over the whole H thing. It would make me so sad if my H couoldn't be there for those experiences.
Go Phils!!
This. MY OB's office has a ultrasound machine with a tech that they used for a dating ultrasound. Other than that, I have gone to a Fetal Medicine Center located on a different floor in the hospital - I went there for my integrated scan and blood work, anatomy scan and followup scans (I am considered "high risk") A tech does the initial scan (and all the techs I have had have been awesome), and a radiologist comes in and confirms her work and does any additional scans. They have a monitor, and another is on the wall for H & I to look at. H has been welcome at all scans, whether by a tech or a doctor.
I also think it is very strange that you PCP wants to do your scans and blood work. I would find a new doctor as so as you can.
That's weird. None of my ultrasounds have been performed by a doctor. They are all ultrasound technicians or whatever you call them and I've always been allowed to see the monitor (although they don't tell me a lot of info) and DH has been there each time.
This, exactly. I have absolutely no idea why they would be giving you such a hard time about that. I'd be switching Dr.'s immediately.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,and He shall direct your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
So I called the dr office today to make my complaint and the person I initialy spoke to as well as the head of administration, who called me later to appologize for my less than desireable experience, sounded as though this was not normal procedure for their office and someone made a huge mistake somewhere along the way. Apprently the tech who did the ultra sound was off today (naturaly) so I will have to wait until tomorrow when they can speak to her and then they will call me back with an explanation of what happened and why.
Also, she is going to see if we can have a "re-do" so that we don't have to wait another 2 months to see our baby.