I have had it with this NICU

JakesBride07 · March 2011

I am beginning to feel totally disrespected by a loy of the staff. DH and I have both requested that two nurses be removed from caring from our babies. These two nurses worked together (one was trainning) caring for Addison the first two weeks of her life. One I have a major problem with someone training on my kids, especially when Addison was sooo sick. And two these two nurses are famous for over stimulating the babies. Well I am home today getting things done, and call to check in the twins and guess who happens to have Blake...the nurse who was in training. And to make matters worse she is busy suctioning him and can't come to the phone. She insists on suctioning everytime the baby destats EVEN THOUGH the doctor has repeatedly said DO NOT SUCTION THEM AT EVERY CARE TIME. ONLY DO IT IF ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. This is the second time she has had Blake since out original request that she be removed from working with him. The first time I was there the whole day and literally watched her suction every three hours and when ever he destated even if she wasn't getting anything out. Addison's nurse even told her not to keep doing it, but yet she continued anyway. Needless to say we then said AGAIN that we no longer wanted her as our nurse. I am livid!

And to top it all off DH and I sat in the peds waiting room for over an hour last night because of a staff meeting. Don't you think someone could have mentioned this when I said "I will be back tonight after shift change?" I could have stayed home and gotten things done. And to make it better last night was bath night and in the midst of the staff meeting Addisons nurse went a head and bathed her so I missed out. I am seeing more and more a huge breakdown in communications all around.

Sorry for the rambiling but I needed to get it off my cheat. I just feel like sometimes they feel like they have the upper hand because we can't take the babies out of the hospital.

Lilystar82 · March 2011

Oh hunny, first off, I am SO sorry you are having such an awful experience. (((huge hugs))) Secondly, I think its time you have a massive meeting with your care team. I would request a sit down ASAP with the neonatologist, the hospital patient advocate and maybe the social worker. You have rights as a parent, and they are NOT being respected. Make you stress how upset you are, and I would frankly be extremely stern with everyone. I am so pissed off for you. This is a stressful enough experience alone, you should NOT have to deal with this.

(((hugs))) If you need ANYTHING, please feel free to reach out.

caitdana · March 2011

Amen to PP. I am so sorry for you. I actually had you on my mind today! We had a few days like this and I am pretty sure every nurse in the NICU knew who we were. You have to meet with you team and let them know. I cant tell you how many tears I shed because I was sick of being told when how and what I could do with MY babies. Stay strong and keep venting.

beyoga · March 2011

Call and talk to the charge nurse. They are the one in charge of assignments.

AVA0908 · March 2011

I am so sorry that you and DH have to go through that on top of the stresses of having babies in the NICU. There was an incident with us as well when a nurse who didn't usually work with DS put him in an open crib after the primary nurse clearly stated NOT to do it. We were so angry (and vocal about it) especially since it lead to his second dose of steroids. Primary nurses were completely on our side while the rest of the staff chalked it up to us being stressed out from being there for so long.

You have to speak up and talk to who ever is in charge because you are the voice for your babies. I hope everything works itself out soon!

njdcgirl · March 2011

Lilystar82:

Oh hunny, first off, I am SO sorry you are having such an awful experience. (((huge hugs))) Secondly, I think its time you have a massive meeting with your care team. I would request a sit down ASAP with the neonatologist, the hospital patient advocate and maybe the social worker. You have rights as a parent, and they are NOT being respected. Make you stress how upset you are, and I would frankly be extremely stern with everyone. I am so pissed off for you. This is a stressful enough experience alone, you should NOT have to deal with this.

(((hugs))) If you need ANYTHING, please feel free to reach out.

This! I'm sorry you are having such issues with your nurses. I feel for you, hon!

kamcfarlane · March 2011

we had an awful time with our NICU. we were there during christmas and because DS was a feeder/grower, he ended up with the B team (nurses from the mom/baby floor). that would have been fine, but all sorts of stuff got screwed up.

definitely meet with the patient advocate and your doctor. if you don't stick up for yourselves now, it will only get worse (in my experience). we tried to talk to our NICU after the fact and they just denied that those things ever happened.

Leigh71 · March 2011

I am so sorry. As a Nicu nurse... i am upset reading your post because you should not have a nurse, ever, if you have said no to them caring for your baby. It's b.s. if they try to tell you it was a "staffing" issue, etc. If you do not want someone to be assigned for your babies... that should be respected. You are the parent. You know what is best for your babies.

NICU is stressful enough w/out having to deal with a staff/unit like this. I feel bad you are going thru this. Have you been able to Kangaroo yet? I know you have said that your DD was on the high frequency vent. I hope you have been able to hold her. And do not let them try and say.."you are stressed out...you need to go home and rest". I hated that when my girls were in the Nicu and the nurses told me that. (and i'm a nurse) I was more relaxed when I was there, sitting by their side, or doing some of their care. Diaper changes, temperature, etc.

And not informing you that you could not be in the unit b/c of a staff meeting...that is unacceptable. And missing her bath.... not acceptable either. I finally had Laurens primary nurse make signs and tape them to her crib. In fact, I asked her to make 2 signs. (so no one could say they didn't see it). One sign was taped to her monitor screen display, and one at the head of her crib. It read, "turn me on my tummy when I desat. Please give me 30 minutes of tummy time to keep my sats up after feeds." I had this done because I got so pissed off that the nurses didn't communicate in report what Lauren needed. One night, (Thank God I was there) her sats fell into the 30s! It was awful. I grabbed the ambu bag.... not the nurses. they just stood there, waiting for her to raise her sats on her own. wth?

The very next morning, I parked my behind in that room at 6:30 am. the sun wasn't even up yet..... I waited for rounds to speak to the "team" and the Neonatologist in person. I voiced all of my frustrations. I had ...had it!! Lauren ended up going home on oxygen for 3 months. (and they kept ignoring my requests to give her a nasal cannula with oxygen). Clearly, she needed it. HUGE HUGS for you and PM me anytime. I am truly sorry you are dealing with this.

lemen99 · March 2011

I'm sorry

lilbit923 · March 2011

I agree with PP. I'm pissed for you as well.

I had an issue with one Neo at Isla's NICU. Granted, Isla was only there for 12 days, but when you're LO is admitted you have no clue how long they will be there or what else will go wrong.

I tried being polite and when that wasn't working, I got loud and made a scene in the NICU twice in front of the nurses and the charge nurse to make sure my point was made and nothing got lost in translation.

My next issue was with one Neo who was on a power trip. Turned out my baby wasn't the only one she was using to bait parents. She'd tell us we were going home and then we'd get there and be told no. It happened to two other families as well. I had...had it! I found the Neo in the hall of the post partum unit and laid into her. I was a sobbing emotional mess and evidently I was louder than I should have been, PP nurses were coming out to listen. I called the Neo on her bullshit and two days later Isla was home.

Turns out this particular Neo does this alot and it pisses off the OB's and nurses. My OB heard that a NICU mom told off this Neo and seems I have a fan club.

Sorry to ramble on but my point is this. Squeaky wheel gets the grease! Start squeaking! If YOU don't like something tell the nurse right then and then forward that complaint to the charge nurse. Hospitals tend to frown upon bad reviews so make sure you let them know you'll put it in writing.

HUGS to you and God hold you close to Him right now. I know how hard it is and the only voice your babies have is you. Stand up for them. You do have rights.

krwys10 · March 2011

I am soo sorry that you are going through this!! (((HUGS)))

Our twins went through a very similar situation with our NICU. I usually really liked the care and the nurses there but there were times when it makes you literally sick. It is in our nature to nurture our babies and that is the first part that makes this scenerio so difficult.

I totally agree with many of the pps, you HAVE to go talk to the manager of the Unit if you want to feel any better about not being there 24/7. Before I went and talked to all of the people I had a few crying fits/hysterics/and arguments with many nurses in the NICU and those do not make anyone feel any better!!!

Good Luck, but just remember you do not have to be the nurses friends, you are there for your babies and you need to make it clear what you wnat for them and they need to abide by your standards! I hope things get better, just please try not to be stressed!!

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