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never thought I would say this....

MrsJOSEnADRIMrsJOSEnADRI
in South Florida Babies

I wanna be a SAHM!!!!

I know it's financially an impossibility for us at the moment and I've been pursuing a promotion to an AP position for so long that I can't give up now.  But, after that week off for Spring Break, my readjustment to work has been really hard.  Work itself is fine.  It's not too stressful or overwhelming.  But, I feel super sluggish and unproductive because I just keep thinking about Elise.

I think that's why I had that meltdown earlier this week about her being with my mom.  I know my  mom is doing her best and Elise will be fine, but those 9 days straight with her were just so wonderful.  I find myself wishing that I could be a SAHM, have two back-to-back, and just go back to work when they are ready for preschool. 

The baby fever is also reving up!  IDK why, but the more time I spend with Elise, the more I think about starting TTC for the next one.  I feel like my mind has been taken over, lol!  What happened to me?!?!?!

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Re: never thought I would say this....

  • mjzmjz

    I feel the exact same way. It blows my mind; I never, ever thought I'd want to be a SAHM.

    But, it's not possible for us right now. The struggle now is accepting that!

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  • jojuanjojuan

    i always loved working but ever since jillian i rather be a sahm but it sucks that we would never be able to afford me being home :(.
     

    I hope it gets better for you.

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  • UMwifeUMwife

    Aww Adri..I remember that feeling. I know going back to work after spending all of spring break with Elise is tough. It's like your first week back all over again. Don't worry though, I'm sure you'll get back into your groove soon. ((hugs))

     & PS: baby fever is REAL! (hence the baby in my belly). Before Carley was born DH and I said we would wait until Carley was one to start trying....but after she was born, that timeline kept getting closer and closer. Good luck!!! 

    from MRS to MOMMA blog

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  • GenaAndJoshGenaAndJosh
    Ditto...and even more now with Ava.  I have a few things going on with contracts, that it may be possible, but the leap to do so, scares the sh!t out of me!

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  • AlbahAlbah member
    Same sentiments here! Now, with baby #2 it's a bit different. It's been harder and more hectic and going to work for a few hours is actually nice to be able to get a small break from all the craziness. I'm at a point where i really like the balance I have. Building a medical practice from scratch is hard and can take up to 4-5 years so things are obviously not crazy at work yet. I work a  few hours a day and get to go home to the boys early for the most part. It's awesome! But it's not going to be like this forever and that saddens me. But by then the boys should be in school so at least I won't feel so bad. So I understand how you feel Adri! Just enjoy every moment you have with Elise! :) Oh, and the TTC part I also get...I felt that way when I had only Evan...hence, 2 barely under 2. ;) But not quite ready for #3 right now, my hands are full!
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  • cocojack10cocojack10 member

    Being a SAHM is my "dream."  I want to be with the boys at all times so I don't miss anything... their first crawl, step... I want to feed them, and rock them to sleep.  I guess I'm a bit possessive, but I think it stems from our long struggle, and wanting to enjoy them every second.

    However, right now it isn't in the cards for us... but I am very fortunate to have been able to convert to PT and have found the perfect job at that.  My boss is a family friend, so he understands our situation.  I work 10am-2ishpm, with the flexibility to work from home if necessary (no babysitter, baby sick, etc).  Like Laura, for us, it is the perfect situation.  I enjoy them in the morning... leave a few hrs... and enjoy them before they pass out for the night (they nap for long time before last bottle and out for rest of night). 

    The summer will be here soon enough, and Elise will be right back with you 24/7!  Like the others said, it is just another adjustment, similar to the first wk after maternity leave.  Hang in there.

    The boys have also struggled with their routine.  MIL is good at TRYING to stick to it, but they are having trouble napping at her house.  The environment is too new so they are just "chismiando" around not wanting to sleep.  What sucks now is that she leaves next wkend for 2 wks to Spain, and in the meantime my mom will take care of them.  DH just told me that it is best if we drop off (I had anticipated her coming here since her house has zero baby equip)... which is going to put yet another hiccup in their routine!!  Oh well.  Hopefully it doesn't mess with our night time sleeping. 

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  • MariMMariM
    Mommy guilt hit me the *minute* Nadia arrived. I feel guilty for everything I do that doesn't involve her (working, getting a baby-sitter for a grownup night out, etc). I am an elementary AP & my hours are very long. Some days & on school nights that I have a workshop or school event- I don't see her at all. On the days I am lucky enough to be home at 4, we go to the park, ride her tricycle, play & enjoy every minute. The other thing I do is remember all the perks I have bc I work: like we went to Disney 5 times last year (bc I have a job & can afford it), I have my own "life" outside of home & I'm successful at it, my child has everything she could possibly need/want & more, & i can treat myself to all the stuff I want too. Plus- i have all major holidays off (winter break, Spring break, 5 weeks of summer)- can't beat that! The first day back after an especially fun weekend is always the hardest. I'm not going to tell you being a working mom is easy bc its not- sometimes I hate that I can't be with her all the time, but I've learned to appreciate being independent & all the positives that come from being a working mom. Good luck & think positive!!!
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  • MrsJOSEnADRIMrsJOSEnADRI
    Thx, ladies!  I'm glad to see I'm not alone.  I do have to be appreciative of my job because, like Mari, we wouldn't be able to do much on one salary.  If I were a SAHM, we wouldn't be able to afford our house, our home improvements, vacations, gymboree, etc.  So, I know this is the best for Elise.  My grandparents took care of me while my mom worked and I enjoyed it.  so, I'm glad my mom has her time to bond with Elise, too.  I also know I have the ideal job for a mom bc of the school schedule and, eventually, she'll get to go to school with me!
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