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If you & your SO each had a name you LOVED...

Clerk9Clerk9 member
in Baby Names

...but it wasn't the same name (naturally), what did you ultimately decide to choose?

DH & I found out recently that we're having a girl.  :)  Of course, we had boy names all ready to go, but had never nailed down one for a girl.  Now we're in a situation where we each have a FN we've fallen in love with & we each like the other's but don't love it.  We're both willing to look for a "3rd option", as well.    

I think the plan is to use DH's mother's maiden name as LO's MN, unless it really doesn't go with whatever we choose as the first name.  (The two FNs we like wouldn't go together, anyway.)  Even though she'd be named after his family, this was my idea, so it's not like it gives me any leverage in the FN battle.  ;)

So, if you've been in a similar situation of each loving a different FN, what happened?  Did you go with one or the other, or did you compromise on something else entirely?  I'm really curious to see how other people's decision-making process worked out.

Sorry this was so long, & thank you for your input!!!  :)   

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Re: If you & your SO each had a name you LOVED...

  • heath06heath06 member

    I'm being induced tomorrow and we're still at the same point you are. I know, we're nuts. We have 2 boy names (Travis and Dylan), we both like both, but I really love one, he wants the other.

    If you have a 3rd option you both love, great, but at this point, we are going with one or the other. I think after I give birth, it would be hard to still try to talk me down :) Which the hubby fully admits. Heh.

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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member
    imageheath06:

    I'm being induced tomorrow and we're still at the same point you are. I know, we're nuts. We have 2 boy names (Travis and Dylan), we both like both, but I really love one, he wants the other.

    If you have a 3rd option you both love, great, but at this point, we are going with one or the other. I think after I give birth, it would be hard to still try to talk me down :) Which the hubby fully admits. Heh.

    Hee hee.  I love that you'll be able to use labor & childbirth to throw some weight behind your choice!  :)  GL with the ultimate decision!   

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  • alliejo725alliejo725 member
    We're taking our favorites to the hospital. Then we'll see if she looks more like one name or another.
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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member
    imagelrachelle80:

    Soooo what are the names? :)

    I'd probably try to pick a third one that works as a compromise, but then go into the hospital and try to see if she/he looked more like one name than another.

    Hi there!  :)  

    I already posted on PgAL about the choices a few weeks ago & wasn't planning on doing it here (I think it hurt DH's feelings & I didn't want this to get into a debate about the specific names), but I won't turn down such an eager request.  The two names are Whitley & Wren.  I won't say who likes which one, though.  ;)

    It's not a bad idea to have some options & then decide once we (hopefully!) meet her.  But I was kinda hoping to have a little more prep time than that!  :)  Thank you for the suggestion.  :)  

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  • ubermooseubermoose
    We went with my choice, with the agreement that we'd use his choice if we had a second daughter. Both of us really liked both names, though.
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  • BrittKavBrittKav member
    We had the same top 3 names, but they were in a different order. His were Mallory (#1), Hazel (#2), and Rosemary (#3). Mine were Rosemary (#1), Hazel (#2), and Mallory (#3). We went with Hazel, which was both of ours #2.
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  • zaramarie81zaramarie81 member
    I say wait until you meet her. It may become clear. This is an issue my sister and her husband deal with a lot (several kids and more to come ;)). Their most recent one was the most difficult. My sister ended up yielding to her husband's (more unique) wishes, and now she is glad she did. The name is great, has grown on all of us, and fits baby so well! (I will say, however, that the name could technically be considered an underused classic, so that helps. It wasn't like truly cruel or out there).
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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member

    imageubermoose:
    We went with my choice, with the agreement that we'd use his choice if we had a second daughter. Both of us really liked both names, though.

    I think I'm going to have to at least try this tactic.  ;)  Glad it worked out for you both!   

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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member

    imageBrittKav:
    We had the same top 3 names, but they were in a different order. His were Mallory (#1), Hazel (#2), and Rosemary (#3). Mine were Rosemary (#1), Hazel (#2), and Mallory (#3). We went with Hazel, which was both of ours #2.

    I may need to encourage DH to make a list...so far, it's just been me finding all of the names, & him saying "no" or "maybe".  The only exception being the one name he came up with on his own that's his favorite!  

    This is a good idea, & it looks like it was the perfect compromise in your situation!  (Hazel is adorable, BTW.)    

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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member

    imagezaramarie81:
    I say wait until you meet her. It may become clear. This is an issue my sister and her husband deal with a lot (several kids and more to come ;)). Their most recent one was the most difficult. My sister ended up yielding to her husband's (more unique) wishes, and now she is glad she did. The name is great, has grown on all of us, and fits baby so well! (I will say, however, that the name could technically be considered an underused classic, so that helps. It wasn't like truly cruel or out there).

    If my DH & I keep on going at this rate, we'll have no choice but to decide once she's here!  ;)  

    It's great that your sister's baby wound up with the perfect name, even if it wasn't originally your sister's idea!  DH & I aren't considering names that either of us don't like at all, so even if one of us compromises more than the other, I feel like we'll be okay once all is said & done.  :)  Thank you for sharing her story...& GL to them for making future naming decisions!!!  

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  • cozylittlecavecozylittlecave

    This might not work for you, but DH & I had VERY different naming styles at first. Ultimately, mine sorta 'won out' based on logics. I had very strong, passionate reasons for the names I liked (and logical ones too), while DH basically just had "I like it" arguments. His favs didn't have any strong meaning behind their choices nor did he have any 'rules' he followed. When we had discussions about names, I usually ended up 'winning' (although it wasn't ever really a competition- this all happened before we were even TTC) since my style had so much more thought put into it. That said, all our name choices & favorites have been a collaboration. While my style is certainly more prevalent in our favs, we both have veto power, and we BOTH love the name we agreed upon. I'd maybe look at the reasons behind your name choices- perhaps that might lead you to one name over the other. (Although that might not apply at all if you've put the same amount of meaning/reasoning into your choices)

    FWIW, we're naming our little girl Philippa (Pippa), and DH's original name choices were Monica, Rachel, Pheobe, Chandler, Ross, and Joey... and they were completely serious. Clearly, our styles were/are totally different, but DH loves Pippa now too- if he didn't, we wouldn't be using it. 

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  • zaramarie81zaramarie81 member
    Haha, GL to you too! I am sure whatever name you choose will be great. :)
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  • Clerk9Clerk9 member
    imagecozylittlecave:

    This might not work for you, but DH & I had VERY different naming styles at first. Ultimately, mine sorta 'won out' based on logics. I had very strong, passionate reasons for the names I liked (and logical ones too), while DH basically just had "I like it" arguments. His favs didn't have any strong meaning behind their choices nor did he have any 'rules' he followed. When we had discussions about names, I usually ended up 'winning' (although it wasn't ever really a competition- this all happened before we were even TTC) since my style had so much more thought put into it. That said, all our name choices & favorites have been a collaboration. While my style is certainly more prevalent in our favs, we both have veto power, and we BOTH love the name we agreed upon. I'd maybe look at the reasons behind your name choices- perhaps that might lead you to one name over the other. (Although that might not apply at all if you've put the same amount of meaning/reasoning into your choices)

    FWIW, we're naming our little girl Philippa (Pippa), and DH's original name choices were Monica, Rachel, Pheobe, Chandler, Ross, and Joey... and they were completely serious. Clearly, our styles were/are totally different, but DH loves Pippa now too- if he didn't, we wouldn't be using it. 

    Hahaha--I love your DH's "Friends" list!  :)  And I also really like the name Philippa (Pippa), but it's already been vetoed.  :(

    My choice does have a little more meaning behind it than my DH's choice does.  He just based his on the boy's name we liked...which, to me, is an argument against it (if we do have a boy in the future, we wouldn't be able to use our #1 boy name if this baby has his choice for a name--they're too similar).  I've been waiting to confront him with this little tidbit of logic, but he's been really stressed at work lately so I'm trying to wait for a more opportune moment.  

    I feel like I really could "out-argue" him on this one, but I don't want him to think that I'm not taking his opinions seriously or that I don't value his say.  (I know that's not what you were implying when you explained your method, but it's how I think my DH might perceive it.)  He's really sweet to me & I do tend to get "my way" about important things a lot of the time, so I'm really trying hard to come to more of a compromise on this one!  Of course I secretly hope that he'll wear down & just accept my choice at some point...  ;)   

    Thank you for explaining how your naming process went...I find all of this input to be so helpful!!!  :)  

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  • Helix07Helix07

    We did not use either one and found a third name we both liked equally.

     

    I liked Gage.

    DH liked Cooper.

    DS will be Connor Gage. 

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  • gmc222gmc222 member

    We had the same issue - I love trendy/poplular names like Harper, Ella, Mia, etc. and he loves '80's' names like Samantha, Stephanie, Jacqueline, etc. There's only really one name that we both like and although we keep having discussions about names, I know she will ultimately be Gabriella. I'm having a hard time committing because I don't love the nn Gabby.

    Good luck!

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