Words you NEVER want to hear when you're in the stirrups getting your Mirena IUD. I freaked out in my head because that sounds awful.
BUT - for the record - it did not hurt. Felt odd and was a bit uncomfortable, but not at all what I thought it was going to be. I wanted to let you know just in case you hear those words because in my head I went "AREYOUFRIGGINKIDDINGME!!!" Just close your eyes and think about sitting on the beach drinking a strawberry daquri. :-)
Re: "I'm going to have to clamp your cervix"
A Frog, A Monkey and a Ladybug
And after, go to ABC Liquor and buy yourself a case of Seagram's.