Vent - I think this is a common phrase?

meheron80 · March 2011

Ok so since my little one was born one month ago my H has been on a rampage about how people want to "take" "steal" her. What I mean by this is: This past weekend at my parents house my mother was in the kitchen cooking and my sisinlaw had just started holding the baby. Mom came out about five minutes later (she had been in there the whole time we had been there so was not aware of anything going on in the living room) and my mom when straight for the baby and said "I'm stealing her now".

My H is driving me crazy - he is so frustrated with my mom, sister, his father, and a few others who constantly "steal" her from others instead of asking if they can hold her next.

I don't know what to do - I personally think he is taking the phrasing to personal but he feels I should stand up to ALL of them and everytime this happens it is my responsibility to tell them no they can't have her (because its my family (he has no family but his dad) ..... I think he just needs control of something and this is it.... but its driving me nuts cause I don't care, I think all women use the phrase "my turn" or "im stealing her now" instead of asking the person.... he is now on this kick that EVERYONE in my family is rude and I am allowing them to "parent" or "take her"... I just don't even know how to explain it that well.... Ok vent over for now.....

jess1984 · March 2011

imo he needs to get over it. people say that all the time. hell i've have random strangers want to steal her from me jokingly of course and while i think thats strange i just figure its a figure of speech.

OctGirl80 · March 2011

I know in both my & DH's families, it's a very common phrase. We're constantly saying "my turn" or "I'm taking her" etc. My sister has even just said "gimme" when grabbing my niece from me or my mom.

Maybe you could gently explain that they don't mean anything by it. Maybe once he realizes that, he'll ease up.

wishin&hopin2008 · March 2011

See I guess I am the odd ball- I would just say to my family that new father stress has been causing my DH to go crazy and would they please refrain from saying this in front of him.

Jenniferk08 · March 2011

He needs to relax. my mom has told me that I can go home but to leave MJ. I've also had co-workers, friends/bosses etc all tell me that they are taking MJ. I take it as a compliment that I have an adorable baby.

honkytonk_kid · March 2011

Is he upset about the phrase or about her being passed around? If it's the phrase he needs to get over it, that's a pretty common thing to say. If he doesn't want his daughter passed around to all the relatives... well, that's legit and maybe you can nicely talk to your family about it.

VMRRN23 · March 2011

Very common phrase. Its in the context of LO being "so precious" so no one would willingly pass around LO, they would need to "steal" her or they wouldn't get to hold LO. Tell DH to take it as a compliment. There are lots of families that don't even welcome babies that much, never mind holding and loving your LO.

bethandjoe09 · March 2011

As long as they're not keeping your DH or you from holding LO when you want to, I wouldn't worry about it. They probably think they're being cute, or haven't really thought about how they're phrasing it.

Now, if they're making comments about coming over to your place in the dead of night, taking LO and absconding to Argentina, I'd be concerned. Otherwise, no big deal.

zeptattoo · March 2011

It is a very common phrase. He needs to get over it. Seriously, there are probably more important things he needs to focus his energy on.

I usually follow up the "I'm stealing him now" with "You can't steal what I willingly hand over to you." It gets a laugh.

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