Must be nice...

JakesBride07 · March 2011

Sitting in the cafe at the hospital eating lunch. There is a table of pregnant women behind me talking about being pregnant. On woman said "I hope this baby comes on time or even early. I dont want to have to be induced."

All I can think is that it must be nice not to be worried and how much I didn't want my babies to come early. I would have gladly taken an induction over preterm labor.

But on a positive note the babies passed their first eye exams and their brain bleeds seem to be resolving now.

caitdana · March 2011

I thought being past my due date would make that feeling go away, but other preemie moms IRL that i have talked to say that it always just kinda stings a little. I know how hard it can be, I hope you are doing well and I think of you and your sweet babies often!

njdcgirl · March 2011

Yeah, it bugs me too. And I wish it was different - for all of us. I think those kind of reminders will always sting a little.

I'm happy to hear the eye exams went well, and great news about the bleeds.

Kate621 · March 2011

Almost 8 months out those comments still bother me. Sometimes its all I can do to bite my tongue. People really do take healthy pregnancies for granted. Glad to hear that the LOs did well with their first eye exams and the bleeds. ((hugs))

jcsntms06 · March 2011

I've noticed that some people are just ignorant and have no idea what they are saying. Because we all know you never want to have a premature baby. I know it's tough to hear, and I usually tune it out, but some times it's not so easy.

Love the positive news on the babies.

Crystal318 · March 2011

Let me preface this by sayinng that I too am a NICU mom but the only difference is that my baby was full term. I completely respect each and every one of your situations. I cannot imagine how hard it must be to have a baby born so early and then have to be in the NICU for so long. I did it for 17 days and after five months I am still not the same.

But I do want to explain that healthy, full-term, induced pregnancies do not always equal a healthy baby. I know a lot of people assume that but its not always true. Everytime I tell people that my baby was in the NICU they say "oh, your baby was early?"

I will admit, I couldnt wait to give birth. Almost 41 weeks along, no problems during my preganancy whatsoever, I was so ready to give birth to my perfectly healthy full-term baby.

Went in for my induction. Labored for 30 hours, started pushing, baby's heart rate dropped, I had an emergency c-section. I woke up in recovery to my fiance crying hysterically telling me that he didnt know what went wrong but that the NICU team was upstairs working on LO and he didnt know if he was going to live. He wasnt breathing when he came out.

Very long story short, my baby ended up having Group B Strep (something I tested negative for), Meconium Aspiration Syndrome, Sepsis, Pneumonia, pneumothorax, heart murmur, hole in his heart, cord wrapped around his neck, he was anemic, had to have a platlet transfusion, no suck.swallow/gagt reflex, he wasnt breathing for at least the first five minutes of life, he was placed on a 72 hour cooling treatment to help his brain not damage any more than it may have already been due to the lack of oxygen. He had a 72 hour video EEG, MRI, CPAP, tube in chest, PICC line, etc. He was in the NICU for 17 (nothing compared to some of you). Every doctor and every nurse pretty much said that my baby should not have been alive and it was literally a miracle that he is here today. Any one of his diagnoses could have killed him alone.

I realize that I am on the Preemie board posting this but it is the only board that I feel like I half way fit in on.

I will tell you that I will never take another healthy pregnancy for granted but you cant always assume that because someone has made it full term and has been induced that everything will go well for them. I just picture myself as that pregnant woman sitting at that table eating lunch at the hospital saying I couldnt wait to have my baby and then having to go through all that. You dont know for a fact that she ended up having a healthy delivery. That woman could have been me and her child could have been my son.

I really and truly hope that this is not taken the wrong way. I really do care about all of you and I read your posts all the time and pray for you and your LO. I guess I just feel like my situation is very unique and most people dont think about those babies who are born a healthy full term weight. Those little babies suffer too (and so do thier parents, emotionally).

Sorry so long.

Thank you so much for listening.

I am so glad to hear the good news about your LO's

JakesBride07 · March 2011

Crystal318...no offense taken. I have seen a lot of full term babies in the NICU in just the few short weeks since I have been there. You are totally right that full term doesn't equal uncomplicated, healthy pregnancy. I think in general people take things for granted until it happens to them. Honestly I read your siggy and I am inspired and find hope that it is possible to overcome all odds.

lemen99 · March 2011

jcsntms06:
I've noticed that some people are just ignorant and have no idea what they are saying. Because we all know you never want to have a premature baby. I know it's tough to hear, and I usually tune it out, but some times it's not so easy.
Love the positive news on the babies.

This exactly!

shanlubey · March 2011

The day before I went into labor with my second son, I am guilty of telling my husband that I couldn't do it anymore. I wasn't speaking physically, because I was fine, but I was a complete wreck emotionally. I felt weak and like I lost the fight with my body. I still feel guilty for saying that each and every day. I assume those girls didn't mean it the same way but I am no better than them.

There is nothing more that I could wish for than a full term baby, but I was still mourning the loss of my other twin and didn't enjoy one second of my short pregnancy. At some points, I would yell at myself for having those thoughts and I was relieved when they diagnosed me with PPD before I ever had my second child. So... I get their point, to a degree, but I'm still resentful of the full term pregnancy. But whos to say she isn't dealing with something like me?

I am SO happy to hear about the bleeds resolving themselves (that's huge) and great results on their eye exams.

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