Single Parents

not feeling strong right now

Stbxh and I have talked about reconsiling a lot lately. I love him very much and there were a lot of issues and before splitting he never really carred enough to try to fix them. We did couples counseling but he really didn't participate. But now he's really being proactive about taking control of his life; not just talking this time, actually getting professional help. His behaviors were role modeled by his family but our split seems to have woken him up and he's really trying to change. The thing is change is not an overnight tihng and I am doing my best to be patient so we can make an informed decision as to whether or not to get back together but it's so hard to sit back and wait.

We have a plan, he's doing some individual work right now and then in a few months if the individual work is continuing to be successful and he feels like he still wants to be together then we'll start some couples counseling. Then we will make a decision. I know it's better to take our time and not rush but it's killing me right now, the last few days have been especially hard. I think we grew so distant before the split that I was able to emotionally detach from him so in the begining it wasn't too hard. But now with all the work he's doing and how compationate he is all of a sudden I'm feeling old and new feelings creep up and it's making it so hard. 

I'm just having such a difficult time right now so I thought I'd vent to you all instead. : ) I'm feeling so lonely and my 2 year old is having a hard time with it so he's been especially challenging lately. I'm also about to start back to school for spring quarter so again, in the long run it's a great move, but it's daunting to take the first steps.

No real question here, just needing some support because while I'm doing what I think is best for my kids and me for now I'm struggling with the emotions. Thanks for reading.

 

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Re: not feeling strong right now

  • Sounds like you have a great plan. Best of luck to you and LO.


    <3 Bumpie Veteran from December 2010 Mama's <3 -
    BFP - TTC Cycle #6: Clomid + HCG Trigger + TI + Progesterone - EDD: 12/11
    Beta #1: 4/1 - 51.5   Beta #2: 4/3 - 189   Beta #3: 4/6 - 778.9
    AMH: 1.06  FSH: 10.7
    DS: 11/2010 Clomid + HCG Trigger + IUI + Progesterone
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  • It's good that you're not planning to rush anything. Have you considered individual counseling for yourself as well? It sounds like you could benefit from it while your H is working on himself.
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