Strawberryalarmclock

mm&m2010 · March 2011

Any update? I read the posts over the weekend. Did I miss the update? Did DH come home?

I hope you are ok, sorry you are dealing with this...

StrawberryAlarmClock · March 2011

Hi. Thanks for thinking of me. No update since he didn't come home last night again. He hasn't returned my text, either. I didn't sleep last night. I kept wondering if this was the beginning of the end. I asked myself: Is this salvageable? Do I even want to fix it at this point,'v Will he be willing to go to counseling? Will it help? Can I raise my son the way I want with DH under our roof? Since I can't answer these questions without him, I'm answering them for myself and coming up with a "probably not" for too many of them.

mm&m2010 · March 2011

I can't imagine what you are going through. I understand he would be upset about the letter, but in my book, not coming home, or even returning calls/texts- thats not acceptable. What if, god forbid there was an emergency with you or LO? It's tuff, but only you know what works for you. All you can do is focus on yourself & baby. Is there any way that there is someone else? It seems pretty easy for him to stay away 2 nights with no contact.

StrawberryAlarmClock · March 2011

mm&m2010:
I can't imagine what you are going through. I understand he would be upset about the letter, but in my book, not coming home, or even returning calls/texts- thats not acceptable. What if, god forbid there was an emergency with you or LO? It's tuff, but only you know what works for you. All you can do is focus on yourself & baby. Is there any way that there is someone else? It seems pretty easy for him to stay away 2 nights with no contact.

I really don't think so, but people have been fooled before. I think he's crashing at a friend's house, but the place he stayed Saturday night is a couple's condo. I can't imagine the GF will let this big smelly drunk snore on her couch for too long before she puts her foot down about it.

It's funny that you say what if there were an emergency. There wasn't, but DS did get hurt yesterday. Something fell on his head and left a mark. I gave him Tylenol and he took a 3 hr nap. If that happened to him while I wasn't around, I would kick myself for not knowing because I was off licking my wounds. Or rather, soaking my wounds in rum.

mm&m2010 · March 2011

Uh- I am sorry DS got hurt. Sounds like DH is a little bit selfish, because again, even if he was mad at you, you would think he would at least text to check on the baby. (but that may just be a man thing too- but if he is drinking, then he probably isn't thinking about it) I probably would have texted him about DS getting hurt, even non emergency, just to see if that would get a response.

I would I hope it all works out for you whether it be with or without your DH.

StrawberryAlarmClock · March 2011

Thanks so much mm&m! I appreciate having someone to talk to about this.

I considered texting him but I didn't want him to think I was trying to be manipulative. Had we needed to go to the pedi, I definitely would have told him of course.

Thanks again for thinking of me. I'm in such a fog right now. The support I get on here is huge for me. Having so many women from so many different backgrounds and current situations all pretty much telling me the same thing - well it's what I need no matter how much it stings. Everyone should have an enormous community to help them through things! Smile There's a smile! I needed that!

mm&m2010 · March 2011

StrawberryAlarmClock · March 2011

StarAnnice:
SAC, I just wanted to let you know that I've been following along and I've been thinking of you. ::hugs::

Aw, thanks SA. I appreciate it!

teamsweet · March 2011

More e-hugs today! I can't believe he didn't come home again. I just read your response from my post yesterday - it's definitely not you being immature to not text him. He awol - so you need to spend your time and energy taking care of ds. God, what an a** to not come home.

I don't know any thing about legal stuff but you might want to document this - I think it could count as abandonment (of your LO) for him to do this.

Jessys_Girl · March 2011

I agree. When you're thinking of legal things like custody/child support/etc. this is definitely something that should be documented and taken into account.

by the way: Total e-hugs. I can't even imagine having to deal with this.

cutie420311 · March 2011

I saw your post on SP too. I've been thinking about you this weekend. DH and I have had sone very tough times as of late and are trying to decide to stay together or separate. I hate to say it, but it seems like DH has made the decision for both of you. I really sorry you're dealing with this. I know how long those sleepless nights are with all sort of thoughts running through your head and getting no answers. I know how alone that can get. Anyway, ((hugs))). My user name is my gmail, feel free to email of you want to talk.

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