I cant take this anymore

angelicalopez29 · March 2011

Mom cares for LO when I'm at work, and I told her not to give LO solids until I talk to the pedi, because she has been wanting to since he turned 3mo. Well. she overrode my request and fed LO with gerber, I am angry, I cant take this anymore, LO has only eaten 1.5oz since 3am... I tried to feed him before coming to work but he wouldn't take the bottle, and I had to go, and she puts him to sleep with 1.5oz in his tummy, and it is already 9.30am.... I don't know what to do, I have to work. and I am so desperate, LO wont eat, my mom does not understand the fact that, I am the mother, so I make the decisions on when to feed LO solids.I am so frustrated, I wish I could quit my job and be with LO and raise him my way, HE IS MYYYYYYYYYYY SON. She tells me that she is only looking for LO's best, but fvck she never respects my opinion, I have no life, she always gets in the way and I'm tired, and worried to death for LO.... how can a baby go without eating for so much time??????

Sorry for this post, the worst part is, I can only cry with myself, I have no friends to vent with...

Am I being over dramatic? how can she put him to sleep without insisting more?

MrsJeffers2006 · March 2011

I'm so sorry she did that. Grandparents think they know best because they have already raised children. It's annoying. I think you should maybe bring your mom to the pedi with you to have the solids talk. Maybe hearing facts from a doctor will make her chill a little.

Kara5109 · March 2011

I think you are being over dramatic. But, with that being said your mom should request your wishes and do exactly as you do. She should have not gave him solids knowing you were not doing solids yet.

CGKyle · March 2011

He's fine, I'm sure he'll make up for it later and power feed. But I would throw a fit about the solids. Is find a new sitter who did respected my choices on how to raise my child.

loveforlife2009 · March 2011

Kara5109:
I think you are being over dramatic. But, with that being said your mom should request your wishes and do exactly as you do. She should have not gave him solids knowing you were not doing solids yet.

This. I would be more upset that I wasn't there for his first solid food. I think she should respect your wishes, however I think you are a little over dramatic because if he actually ate any of it he might just be ready for some. I know with my DD no matter how much you tried until she was ready there's no way any of it would end up in her stomach.

MSC03 · March 2011

I would be livid, especially since he's so young.

I'd probably give it a shot to sit her down and lay down the law. If she can't follow how YOU want YOUR child to be cared for, you will need to come up with alternative arrangements.

Rach21 · March 2011

I would be upset, but I'd talk to Mom about it. I recently had to talk to my Dad about G's feeding schedule because DH & I feed G when he wakes up from a nap, but my Dad (who watches DS while we work) feeds him only to put him down for a nap. Won't feed him if he's screaming cuz he says G will only throw up because he gets himself so worked up. Well, duh, he's hungry! I've picked up G before, he's had a throwdown in the 5 minutes it takes to get from their house to ours, I call to see when he ate last and it was 5-6 hours ago! Sheesh, no wonder!

Instead of accusing, though, I just explained our schedule, explained we needed him to stick to it so G could go to bed without waking up all hours of the night to feed, and we haven't had problems since. My Dad is a bit touchy sometimes, but he sucked it up because we're the parents.

IMHO, you should talk to her and discuss (without accusing or getting too emotional) why you are waiting for the pedi's ok for solids and please stick to your plan.

Mrslovebugs · March 2011

I would be pissed, but I also think you're being over dramatic (I think it's just the way you wrote that?).

You definitely have every right to be upset. Can you find a new sitter if your mother will not respect your decisions?

SDarling324 · March 2011

I don't think you are being overdramatic, he is your son so what you say goes. It really doesn't matter if anyone other than you thinks you are being overdramatic about this though, if it is bothering you then you need to do something about it. Especially because she is your mother you should be able to tell her exactly what you are feeling and not feel bad about being to the point and laying down the law.

If I were in your shoes the conversation would go a little something like this...

Mom, if you insist on ignoring my wishes then I will be forced to find someone to watch DS who will. I would much rather have my own mother/family member watch DS while I am at work but do not think for one minute that I won?t find someone who takes what I have to say about raising MY child seriously.

GL!!

angelicalopez29 · March 2011

I did talk to her, but she gets angry and starts telling me "oh, so I am doing a bad job but you let some co worker hold your baby" it's obviously not the same thing, she cares for him all day what does that relate to someone holding my baby for a while? I tried to talk but she says I never listen to her, we live together, I moved in with her because of issues with DH, then I bought a house and asked her to move with me, so she wouldn't have to pay rent... But now, it is getting on my nerves, she cannot take any suggestion because she gets mad, and uggg I am so angry still, but sorry for being so dramatic, I even got an attention note at work for having an angry face, gosh....

Bottom line, I tried the talk, she doesn't understand. I already started looking for a daycare already...

and btw, when I mentioned that she always gets in the way, it is, when I got married, she was just the same...

Rach21 · March 2011

Sounds like your mom has boundary issues. Good luck!

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