Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Q's about TTC # 2 (or more.

What kind of age gaps would you like between your kids and why?

Other than age differences, what other requirements do you have before TTC #2 (or 3, 4 etc.) 

 

We don't really have a certain age difference that we'd like between our kids. I have read that waiting 18-23 months after the birth of one child to conceive the next seems to be best for babies health. I can't remember where I read that though. Using that time line we'd be TTC next June-December. That seems a bit early but who knows!

Our biggest factor is money, we'd like to be debt free (other than our soon-to-be home) which should happen by December. We have a small student loan and the last 2 years on a car payment to rid ourselves of. We'd love to wait for our home to be paid for first but that will probably be 10 years, dh is in his early 30's so we'd rather not wait 10 years :D

I'm curious what others think.  ?

 

Re: Q's about TTC # 2 (or more.

  • We're debating having #2 at all, honestly...but, it's still a possibility. I am beginning to think that if it happens, we'll have a bigger gap-maybe when DS is 3-5 years old.I think it'll likely be after he is out of diapers for sure, unless our minds get drastically changed.  It would probably just make more sense for us. I just graduated from grad school right before we found out I was pregnant, and haven't started a full time job (teaching) yet. DH is is getting his PhD and will hopefully graduate next year, then we'll be moving to wherever he needs to go.

    So, before TTC, we would get moved next year or so, I would want to be settled working for awhile (we would be WAY better off financially by that time), and DS can be a little independent. It would also be nice to travel with just DS a couple times first, and then I might be ready to go back to being at home with a new baby.

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  • As far as age gaps, I think waiting a year is good. There's no guarantee that you'll get pregnant within the first few months, but if you do, your kids will be nearly 2 years apart- which to me, seems acceptable. (I'm not talking about you specifically; it's an all-inclusive 'you')

    As far as other requirements go, I'd like to have my current 'baby vehicle' paid off so that I can trade in my work car for something that will accomodate one car seat, let alone two... for my peace of mind, I'd want both myself and DH to have vehicles we can safely and comfortable transport both kids.

    I told DH I'd like to try for #2 when Lucian hits a year old... I wouldn't want to wait more than a year and a half to TTC again. Not only do I want to be done with having kids by age 30, I have medical issues that will make it harder to concieve if I wait.

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  • I want another ASAP so my only requirement is getting DH on board. I think it will be awhile. 
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  • Originally, I had hoped to become pregnant this upcoming summer and my dd wouldve been close to 3 1/2 when the baby had been born. But apparently my body had other ideas and I had a sweet babe 12 days ago. Wink Its been going okay, transitioning my dd to being a big sister and not an only child. I do think it would have been easier had she been a little older. Im thinking I definitely want ds to be 3 before we start TTC #3. I may change my mind, to be honest, although this baby had been a surprise I was completely thrilled and had been going through "empty uterus syndrome."

    Im rather young at 20. My dh will be 29 next month. Hed prefer to have them closer spaced but as my clock's not ticking in the least- we wait. Wink

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  • I don't really care about age gaps, except I'd like to be in better shape the next time I get pregnant. However I would like to have more income than what we have now, and that's gonna take some time. It may be another 2-3 years before we TTC again.
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  • I was reading an article recently and there was a study that took into account sibling rivalry, relationship with parents, and success-and the best gaps were a year or less (since the oldest one was too young to be used to being the baby) or more than 4 years (since the oldest got time alone with parents).

    With that being said, if we have 1 more, I'd do it when DD is 2.5. If at that time it doesnt make sense financially/emotionally, I wouldnt have another child and DH will be "fixed" (haha). I'm not a fan of big gaps between siblings.

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  • I got pregnant with #2 when my daughter was 9 months old.  I was planning on at least around a two years age different...baby # 2 was a happy surprise though (we had trouble conceiving DD1)

    #3 will be planned when these girls get a little older.  I am pretty tired and I want to enjoy them for a few years!  Maybe when this one is around 3 we will plan for it.

    DD (8/12/09), DD (2/8/11)
    BFP 12/16/14| EDD 8/19/15 |MMC 1/15/15 (9 weeks 1 day)
  • Our girls are 14 months apart and it's a wonderful age gap. I love it. The older one was too young to have jealousy issues, I'm still in baby-mode, my second was SO much easier than my first so it she seems super easy to care for, they'll both be into the same activities at the same time, be able to share toys, hopefully have a really close relationship being so close in age...

    That being said, my stomach looks like a disaster from having babies so close. I want to have a while to have my body to myself (which will be awhile, since I plan to BF each baby for ~2 years) before TTC again. I'm hoping to wait 4-5 years and have 2u2 again. I really do love this age gap.

    Anneliese Olive 11/5/09
    Hazel Dianna 1/8/11
    Luna Valentine 4/25/13


  • If we waited until everything was perfect we would never have kids, LOL.  I set a personal goal of having 2 children before I turn 35.  I had my first 2 months after I turned 33.  We will wait 10ish months and then TTC #2, so they should be just under 2yrs apart if all goes well.  We worked on our debt before #1 and only have a couple more payments to make so that wont be an issue.  Our next goal is to save for a down payment for a house.  We live in San Diego so homes are expensive here, it will probably take a couple years.  
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  • We never had a set time for having #2, we just waited until it felt right.  DH was ready when DS1 was around 15months and I got on board about a month later.  Our boys are almost 2.5 years apart, and so far so good.  But for my own sanity, I don't think we'll be having #3 until at least one of the boys is in school, which is 3 more years.  I know I'm going to get empty ute syndrome before that, so I guess we'll see!
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  • My oldest is seven years old. When my second baby came along, ds was a couple months shy of turning three............ it was a NIGHTMARE!!!!

    Now my daughter and this baby are 4.5 years apart and I love it. I like this age gap way better than the first.

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  • DH is moving into a new assignment at work that will last 2 years, after which he will most likely deploy. This new assignment is very intensive and requires 12-hour days, 6 days per week. I can't imagine having another newborn when DH is working that kind of schedule and we are not living near any family, so we will definitely wait until he is done, probably about 3 years. 
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  • We don't have any preference for age gaps, we just know that we can't afford a second baby just yet. I'm carrying the bulk of the finances bc DH is still doing his doctorate. However, I can't stop thinking about baby #2. I hate being pregnant but have really enjoyed my newborn and everything else so far. I'd love to quit my job to stay at home with the kids, but even if that's not feasible, we need DH to be out of school, he's had to commit so much time to his research. That's pretty much the only requirement we have.

    Also, I don't want to wait a lot longer bc I am getting old and I want to have 2 kids by 28. I'm 25 so we might start TTC in 2 years. 

  • We're probably done with our family, but we had our kids 16 months apart, which I think is rare for people to do on purpose.  Everyone thought it was an accident.  I just wanted the pregnancy stage of my life over with and I liked the idea of the kids being close in age.  It'll be hard at first, but in the end I think it'll have big benefits.
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