How to tell the father — The Bump
1st Trimester

How to tell the father

Hi!

I just found out I'm pregnant, I'm really excited about it but I don't know how my boyfriend will react to the news...you know guys...they tend to freak out easily.

any advice on how to give him the news?

thanks

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Re: How to tell the father

  • Pee on his leg and ask him how many lines he sees.

    No?  Maybe my idea needs some work.

    Maverick5
  • Pass him a note in homeroom?

     

    (I couldn't resist)

     Just tell him.  Two words "I'm pregnant". 

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  • Lame. Try harder.
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  • Write him a poem, this is one of my favorites!

    "You wanted a suck,

    I wanted to fvck.

    Guess what babe?

    You knocked my ass up!'

    Formerly **eco**4k posts down the sh*tter Chart
    Maverick5
  • It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?
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  • image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.

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  • image Lambie.:

    Pee on his leg and ask him how many lines he sees.

    No?  Maybe my idea needs some work.

    PLEASE do this!  If only I thought of this first! 

    DS- 11/08,  DD1 - 05/10,  DD2 - 11/11

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  • image lisajay09:
    image DrBeepersWife:

    Write him a poem, this is one of my favorites!

    "You wanted a suck,

    I wanted to fvck.

    Guess what babe?

    You knocked my ass up!'

    Yay!  I love that one....classic AND timeless!

    That's really cool :D

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  • image shanlice:

    image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.

    What do you mean?

    Formerly **eco**4k posts down the sh*tter Chart
  • image DrBeepersWife:
    image shanlice:

    image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.

    What do you mean?

    Yeah I have no idea what you mean.  Are you special on your thoughts?

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  • image shanlice:

    image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.

    i think she means he's special.  like the olympics...

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  • image robinsokj:
    image DrBeepersWife:
    image shanlice:

    image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.


    What do you mean?

    Yeah I have no idea what you mean.  Are you special on your thoughts?

    Let's just say he is not very fond of commitments. I mean, we love each other a lot but he is always saying how much he likes to be on his own every now and then and that short of things

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  • image shanlice:
    image robinsokj:
    image DrBeepersWife:
    image shanlice:

    image dana1318a:
    It sounds like you're worried he might not be as excited as you'd like, so maybe focus on something he might think is fun about having a kid?  Like give him a newborn onesie from his favorite sports team or something?

    Yeah, the thing is this was totally unplanned , I'm sure he will be excited but he's quite special on his thoughts sometimes (if you know what I mean).

    I guess I have the typical fears of an unplanned pregnancy, right? :)

    thanks to all of you for your answers.


    What do you mean?

    Yeah I have no idea what you mean.  Are you special on your thoughts?

    Let's just say he is not very fond of commitments. I mean, we love each other a lot but he is always saying how much he likes to be on his own every now and then and that short of things

    Uh oh.

     

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  • This does not bode well.  I would tell him straight out, not try to be cute about it. H&H 9 months to you.
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  • Well, nothing says committment like a bun in the oven.
  • image sleepingbeauty:

    i think she means he's special.  like the olympics...

    I think you're special. Like totally douchey.
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  • image Lambie.:
    Well, nothing says committment like a bun in the oven.

    GL OP! 

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  • image shanlice:
    Let's just say he is not very fond of commitments. I mean, we love each other a lot but he is always saying how much he likes to be on his own every now and then and that short of things

    If he's not "very fond" of commitments, then maybe he should have been an adult and wrapped that bad boy up before he played. Forget the cute way of telling him, try the adult way of just saying it so you two can get a game plan together.

    In response to your OP, I didn't tell my DH in a cute way, I ran to him and shoved my pee sticks in his face and screamed "They're Positive!" Fun? No. Practical? Very!


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  • I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 
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  • image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    I was on the pill. But these things happen sometimes...and I can assure you I'm super excited.

    "I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state"

    no offense but I think that was pretty unfair.

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    Maverick5
  • image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    Do you judge ALL women who have an OOPS pregnancy so harshly?  Damn.

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  • I feel like this is sort of asking us "what should I get tattooed on my back?". In this circumstance, it seems like you're the only one who knows your bf, so you're the one who could best measure how to tell him.
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  • image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    I pray you get off your judgmental and quick-to-assume high horse.

    Maverick5
  • First of all, Congratulations! Secondly, since your bf isn't big on commitments and this is a HUGE one. I would avoid all cutesy attempts to let him know. I think this would really freak him out. Just find the right time to let him know what's going on and be honest about how y'all feel about this new life. Best of luck to you.
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  • My husband plays video games endlessly....I waited till he was in a match and told him we needed to talk......he said okay after this match......sooo i just blurted it out. Needless to say he didn't play his video game that night  :)

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  • image Janimal:

    image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    Do you judge ALL women who have an OOPS pregnancy so harshly?  Damn.

    yes, yes she does.

    and heaven forbid if the mom of said oops baby is SCARED and anxious about it.  

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  • image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    Why are you assuming she has no health insurance and the state will support the baby? Should she have used protection? Yes, but let's not jump to conclusions. She could also have an amazing support system beyond her  boyfriend and she may have a great job and great insurance. Don't be so judgmental.

     

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  • Congrats on your pregnancy. I am so glad your excited! Your BF if he isn't a total asshat will come around. I agree with all the PP's in saying try to be upfront and not all cutesy. Make sure you talk to him about the commitment of being a father and what that entails. It's quite different from the commitment of dating or marriage. Which I am sure you know that, but he might not. I wish you the best and don't listen to the judmental b!tches on here.
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  • I was super scared when i told DD's father. We were with a bunch of friends and a few of them knew cause I was with them when I took the test. We were all planning on going to the movies and I just coudln't do it, I finally just took him into my room and told him that I have something to tell him. I was 18 at the time and didn't know him too well, but it all worked out. I had my DD and I am no longer with DD's father, but now I am married to a wonderful man and expecting another baby.

    Just take care of yourself and that baby :)

     



  • i told my boyfriend when we were joking around wrestling and i told him to be easy so he didnt hurt his two little babies.. meaning me and the baby (:
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  • image lanoue25:
    I too have no advice. You should have been more careful if you  knew how he was with commitments because now his ass is locked into one forever. I pray you have health insurance and some one is going to support this baby instead of the state. These are the posts that piss me off! There are women on here who them and there DH would be thrilled to see a pink line and then we get crap like this! If you dont want a baby then get on the PILL people!! 

    Your post is the kind of post that pisses me off.  What exactly is your goal?  To make a woman who is already freaked out also feel bad about herself?

    Here's a tip: when a woman you don't know from Adam is a little unsure and looking for a little guidance, try not to start a sentence with "you should have."  It's really uncalled for and not at all helpful.  And it makes you sound like a spoiled, judgmental brat.

    So rude.

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  • i am in the same situation. sorry accidents happen.. you'll have to get over it. it happened for a reason. you don't have to be rude to people who got into an accident like this. it doesnt mean that they don't want the baby now as much as other people would like to have one.
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  • image Alltwistedup:
    Congrats on your pregnancy. I am so glad your excited! Your BF if he isn't a total asshat will come around. I agree with all the PP's in saying try to be upfront and not all cutesy. Make sure you talk to him about the commitment of being a father and what that entails. It's quite different from the commitment of dating or marriage. Which I am sure you know that, but he might not. I wish you the best and don't listen to the judmental b!tches on here.

    Thanks for your words.

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  • It's midnight here, I'm going to bed now - I will tell him tomorrow , I'll let you know what happen. :)

    Thanks for all your kind (and not so kind) words.

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  • I hope telling him goes well for you. And just remember, guys take longer to come around sometimes. His initial reaction might not be great, but after he has time to think he will tell you how he truly feels. 

    I recently had to do this myself and my bf did not react well in the beginning. I just gave him some time then he came to me and apologized for his words and we sat down and had a good conversation about it. 

    Best of luck to you!! 

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