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Baby isnt even here yet and hes taking him?
When do you ladies think it is acceptable for an infant to leave its mother for the entire weekend? (I will be breastfeeding)
My BD just informed me that he took Labor Day off and will be taking our son to Madagorda with him (beach 6 hours away) so his parents can see him. I told him no that I could not be away from him for a whole weekend and pose a risk in a decrease in my supply and that he would only be like 3 months so that is not old enough to be away from me for 3 whole days and nights. I did tell him that I would be more than happy to take him down there that weekend or any other weekend though. Especially since he will be on the beach drinking in and out of the water anyways so it's not like he will be with him. So he told me fine then I will let my lawyer get involved. I havent even had him yet and hes already planning out when he is taking him and that he is going to get lawyers involved.
I know this is dramatic but if I do not let him take his son whenever he wants, with his name on the BC, will it look bad on me when we do go to court?
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Re: Baby isnt even here yet and hes taking him?
Oh no everyone has told me that 18 months is the typical overnight starting point. I was just worried that with him being on the BC and acknowledged as the father and me denying him the "rights" to take him it would look bad on me in court.
Which has got me to the point where I have considered not putting him on the BC until a paternity test is taken so that if he up and decides to take him during a 2 hour visit it would be considered "kidnapping". I have heard that if the dad is on the BC they can take the child and cops cannot do anything unless there is a parenting plan.
This isn't a "right" though. I believe that he cannot be held liable for CS if he isn't on the BC, but I could be wrong here, anyone?
He cannot just take the child if he doesn't have custody. You need to file for custody first, in order to ensure that he cannot just take the child.
I have told him multiple times that his parents can come here any time they wanted to see him as could he come. I told him if he wanted to see him overnight he could sleep in my bed or in the nursery at any time.
He just gets mad saying that I am not going to keep his son away from him. This isnt my intention by any means and I even offered to take our son down there so that I could still wake up with him at night, feed him by breast not bottle, and be there for him since he will be so young and it seems traumatic to take him away from me so early. I think he thinks its going to be the holdiay so all his friends are going to be in town and he will want to show him around and things. Which is fine but thats selfish to take him away from his mother to have to do these things.
To prevent this stuff from ever being an issue you need to file for custody of LO once baby is born. Go see a lawyer and get informed. A lot of lawyers will offer free consultations. Get all the paperwork filled out now so that you can go down to the court and file ASAP after the baby is born.
My understanding is htat if BD is listed on the BC and there is no CO in place then he has the same parental rights that you have and can take the baby and there isn't much you can do outside of going and filing emergency order stuff with the court to force him to bring the baby back. If he's not on the BC then paternity will need to be established before he would have parental rights (and also before you would be awarded CS).
Like pp have said, it's highly unlikely that a judge will order a baby of that age, that is BFing, to travel 12 hours and spend days away from the mom (but you need to file to have the judge make that call). Good luck!
https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/47942015.aspx
#4, #3, #2, and #8 especially and in that order.
You're welcome in advance!
Do you guys have a court order regarding visitation? If not, you aren't required to let him take the baby for even 5 minutes, never mind an overnight or multi-day trip.
Since you will be breastfeeding at that point, there is no way a judge will order you to let the baby go with him.
Stand your ground and don't let legal threats worry you - if he talks to a lawyer, the lawyer is going to tell him the same thing.
No ma'am we don't have a court order for visitation. I am only 26 weeks pregnant so still waiting for LO to arrive. I thought everything had to be done after the birth and after he actually does sign the BC. I am for sure going to stand my ground, I was just livid that he would tell me when he is taking the LO since he's not here yet. Thank you for all your help