Maryland Babies

need help getting independent toddler ready in the morning! Need suggestions & tips

Help please!

DD wants to do EVERYTHING herself - put on her own shoes, socks, pants, etc. and basically she can do everything with a little bit of help, but it takes her about 10x as long as it would take me or DH.  I want to encourage her independence, but I also don't want to have to wake her up an hour early every day to get ready. 

She's still pretty much fine w/ me picking all her clothes - so its not a "choice" issue and if it was I'd pretty much let her pick whatever she wanted to wear, its just an "I DOOOOO IT" issue. 

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Re: need help getting independent toddler ready in the morning! Need suggestions & tips

  • Is it that she's dawdling when she's supposed to be getting dressed, or she's actually doing it, she's just taking a long time? Our friends had the first issue with their daughter and set up a cool timer thing to help her along (she's 4 though, so this may not apply with E). Could you make it into a game somehow?
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  • Is there a way you could set stuff out for her so she could get started by herself, then you could run and do something for yourself and let her have some time to get it done on her own? 

    DD is like this- we have done what we can so certain things she can do herself (like we have all of her dishes in a bin in a lower cabinet and she goes and gets them by herself) but I know the time thing.  What I do is set her up to put on her socks and shoes by herself and then I go and brush my teeth.  If she gets it done while I am brushing my teeth then it's fantastic, if she's not done in those 2 minutes then I help her.  Sometimes I do meet resistance, but then I just explain that we have to get in the car and hurry go-go-go and then she gets over it. 

    When all DD wore were crocs she could do her shoes all by herself, she can also get a hat on by herself- so I try to let her do those things totally solo, so that when I have to help her it's not as big an issue.

    I will say that I know some moms just always do it for their kids and then they are dealing with a 3.5 year old who won't take off his own shoes, because he's never had to do it- so it's great that you are even thinking about ways to let her do it herself.  I feel that with so many of these skills there is a window, and if you don't take advantage when they naturally want to do these things then you lose your chance and it's a battle later on w/ an older and more stubborn child.  

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  • I let DD do it, but I have to stand there to keep her on track because if not she will start playing, get sidetracked, start looking for stuff, read books So I just kind of say "shoes now" and have her stick her foot in it as I hold it out, then she will finish it up. I know she can get dressed and use buttons and zippers, but I let her do it all herself when we have time like before bed. I don't know if it's the same issue, DD just dawdles, so I really need to keep her on track and be right there while she does it.
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  • What we do is have Aiden's clothes out and tell him to get dressed while we are doing something else (showering, making lunches, etc.)  The shoe thing always drives me nuts.  I've been giving him to the count of three to start putting his shoes on, and if he doesn't I do it for him, which he doesn't like.
    Laura & Jim ~ July 10, 2004
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    miscarriage on 11/26/09 at 5w6d
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