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School-Aged Children
Disorganized child
Now, yes, this is a trait that was handed down to him by his parents but I am at my wits end.
My 2nd grader is the most disorganized kid pretty much in his class. He is in a high cap program and his work and his grades are great but the teacher expects them to self motivate and work kind of at their own pace. He stays in for recess sometimes to finish projects and is constantly forgetting his stuff at school. This weekend he has a big science project due and he left everything at school. The directions, the data, his rough draft, etc. Now we are trying to finish it and we can't. This is a recurring theme. Book reports, math homework, spelling lists. We are constantly calling friends to ask for the stuff.
He is a great kid. He isn't disruptive, he is friends with everybody, he excels in most things that he does but I am starting to wonder if he has a bit of an attention issue. For example, he is constantly moving. I dropped him off at the bus stop the other day and he paced back and forth until the bus came, the teacher also has said he does not sit in his chair, he rocks back and forth and she is afraid he is going to hit his head. He spins, too, round and around and around when his is bored (does anybody else's child do this? What is that??) His backpack is never zipped and stuff is always going everywhere. He had his whole math binder dumped in the back of my car the other day. The teacher left his desk the way he left his desk the day of our parent teacher conference and it looked like a tornado went through. She said it make it difficult for him to keep up with the class because he can't find stuff easily. I have emailed her a few times when his lunch containers and other misc. stuff have not come home and she has made him clean out his desk at my request. His teacher really likes him but to compare her to his teacher last year she is very passive.
I mentioned this to his pedi when we went in for a flu shot and a well child check and he said meds right off the bat. Actually he said, "I can fix that, you know, with meds". Didn't even ask any questions. Now I'm on the hunt for a new pedi as well. (He was a new pedi and it was only the second time he had seen him.)
How do you organize a 2nd grader? And where is the best place to start to have him evaluated?
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Re: Disorganized child
The problem I have with that specific pedi is that I do not trust his recommendations. I work with doctors and I just don't feel that he is a good fit. I am not going to medicate him until a) I have him evaluated and b) I have exhausted all options surrounding his environment. I think having him evaluated by a psychologist is the first step but do I go through the school district or do I pursue on my own. Part of my question about that is considering he is in the highly capable program, I wonder if the school district will even consider using their own resources. He really has no significant behavioral issues in his classroom besides not being able to sit on his chair properly and he is social at inappropriate times. He is in a classroom with 27 other kids (mostly boys) who all have the same "issues".
I looked up sensory seeking behaviors and very few of the behaviors on the lists described him (but I do not use Dr. Google for diagnosing my children so I take that with a grain of salt). However, I also looked up EFD (as I've never heard of it) and that fits him. I have a very good girlfriend who is a behavioral therapist who knows him quite well. I'll have to pick her brain as well.
When looking for a child psychologist, what am I looking for? I am at a loss on where to even start.
My background: I teach middle school and high school English for GT kids with ADHD/executive function weakness/mild language processing disabilities. I also worked for 6 years with a speech pathology practice that specialized in executive function weakness.
Additionally, I have executive function weakness and my oldest kid is a GT kid with serious organizational problems.
There's no medication that will make your son more organized. However, if he does have one of the several forms of attention deficit disorders, he will have an easier time using organizational strategies if he is on meds for ADHD. Second grade is a fantastic time to get working on diagnosing whatever's going on with your son and coming up with strategies to make your lives easier. I found that my DD's teachers were also reluctant to say that she might have a problem with organization. She is so bright, well behaved, and likable that teachers didn't want to get real about her issues. I always had to be the one who mentioned it.
Here are some things you might do at home, at school, and with your doctor to help your son.
Medical: get several referrals from your guidance counselor, from your pediatrician, and from any parents you know who have kids with an IEP for psycho-educational testing. You will probably get more information and more sensitive, detailed testing if you pay for a private specialist to conduct tests than if you have him tested through the school system.
School: Simple systems and LOTS of routine are the keys to helping a disorganized child succeed. He needs one place (probably a folder) to put papers. If the teacher can give him a desk without a space to hold papers, it will help him. Those little trays under the desks are the bane of the disorganized kid. If he has school supplies like scissors, crayons, glue sticks, etc., maybe he can keep them in a box in the coat closet or something. He should have NO place to put papers during the day other than his folder.
Home: The first homework task every night should be sorting papers, tossing out trash, and making a "to do" list for the evening with everything he wants to do: homework, chores, and playtime. He will need your help with this at first. Disorganized kids get overwhelmed with the sheer number of papers. You may have to show him how to go through papers one at a time and sort them into piles such as: "trash," "keep at home," and "back into folder." Clean out the backpack every day. The last homework task is always "pack up backpack so it's ready for tomorrow." Kids always want to dash off and play the minute they finish that last math problem, but this leads to lost papers and stress in the morning.
People with executive function weakness don't magically get better. But, people can learn strategies to improve their organization which will help them lead less stressful lives and reach their potential at school, work, and home.
GL!
This. All of this.
Are there any children's hospitals in your area? Often they have good testing programs for ADHD, autism, etc. My son is being tested for occupational therapy issues, but I know the hospital/medical center also does testing for many children's special needs. The medical center will provide occupational therapy (although I will dicuss the options with my pedi before signing up for anything). Also, if they think he needs additional testing (for example, if the motor skills problem is the sign of another problem), they will discuss it with me and my doctor.
One thing - my insurance does not pay for the testing, and at least in my case, a doctor / pedi needs to write a prescription to have the tests done. You can't just walk in and say you want a test.