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Is this dumb to be ticked about?

caligirl0715caligirl0715
in Single Parents

I'm not fuming or anything but just irritated. I don't like wasting my energy on this stuff but I'm just bugged by it.

My ex and I have been getting a long really well lately. I have to give him a lot of credit for turning a lot around in a short amount of time. I certianly don't expect overnight perfection. But this just got me.

My DS has been having a really hard time with the seperation. Today is particularly hard for him, a lot of crying, asking for Daddy etc. So by tonight he was just getting to a point of being beside himself, "want Daddy home", "I worried about Daddy", etc.

So I call him and he's nice about it but says, "I'm sorry that sucks, I don't know what you want me to do though". I tell him that R really wants to see him and is upset. He says, "well I'm already downtown with my Dad for the hockey game"... So like I said, it's not a big deal but if it were me and I heard my son was having that hard of a time and asking for me, I'd be in the car in a second. But maybe that's just the difference between us... I don't know it just bugged me, probably just the product of a really hard day. Sad

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Re: Is this dumb to be ticked about?

  • dimakedimake

    I don't blame you for being frustrated about it, but at this point it's probably still too much to ask - I know when my DD was sick once (trip to the ER sick) the most I could get him to do was bring me children's tylenol on his way home from work (but not stop inside, because god forbid DD see him and want him to stay).

    Even though he is getting better, and may continue to improve as a person, unfortunately right now you just have to adjust your expectations of him.

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  • julia0402julia0402
    I think I would be annoyed by that too.  (My daughter does not ever ask for him so I can't say for sure as I have never been put in that situation.)  But I agree with dimake that you probably just have to adjust your expectations of what he is capable of, unfortunately.
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  • caligirl0715caligirl0715

    Thanks ladies, the more I think about it, the more I feel like it's just more about having a bad day which has been the icing on the cake of a bad few months. I really feel bad complaining, I am blessed with wonderful parents and two healthy kids, we have a roof over our heads and food on the table. It's just felt lately like it's been one thing after another and I just can't come up for air. I'm trying to juggle it all with a smile on my face for the boys but I'm exhausted and I am longing for some relief.

    But then I look at my little ones and my 2 year old running around in his diaper yelling, "I SUPER GROVER Mommy!" and I can smile again.

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  • cbbccbbc

    Eh I get your point but I don't think I'd spend too much time being mad about it. It would be different if your son was really sick or something and he still chose to stay at the hockey game. Maybe next time you can let DS talk to him on the phone. Do you think it would help to just hear his voice or would it make it worse?

    I will agree with PP about adjusting your expectations and only expecting what's realistic. My oldest son has a different dad and it took me a long time to come to terms with that. GL

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