On formula blah!
tistampsup
member
With Jake's sugar bottoming out, I had to supplement with formula while he was in the NICU, since my milk wasn't in all the way. I was never able to pump enough for a "full serving". When his sugar started leveling out, they told me I could breast feed again, but I couldn't mentally handle that. I had to physically see how much he was taking in. I didn't trust nature to take it's course. Sorry Mother Nature.
So when we got home, I continued to pump. It was so difficult. Every 3 hours I was strapped to a chair while DH gave him a bottle. It was heartbreaking and so emotional for me. I was sleep deprived and didn't feel like I was bonding with Jake. On top of all that, I still couldn't pump enough milk, so we had to supplement with formula.
After a week of doing this, I decided to just formula feed. Call me a bad mother, but I just couldn't continue to strap myself to the chair and do it anymore. I was pumping and feeding every 3 hours.
Now DH and I are taking shifts since he's on vacation for the next 2 weeks. It's helped me out so much! I can actually see straight and pay attention to Jake.
Re: On formula blah!
In no way are you a bad mother!!! Believe me, you will be much happier w/out the stress of worrying about how much he will be getting, how much you're pumping, etc. Bf'ing is a hard task and def. does not come easy. Give yourself some credit that you did for a week...better than nothing!
If you're a bad mom, then I'm worse. I never tried to BF for all of the reasons (and others) that you mentioned.
I'm happy, DH is happy, and Landon is happy. So that makes me a good mom.
Don't worry- you have to do what works for you.
Life of mrsjanks
Thanks for all the positive words, ladies! I knew it was going to be a lot of work, but with all these sugar issues, I just had to see how much was in that damn bottle. I wrote down every tiny little milliliter!
We keep a daily log of bottles, diapers, sleep/awake times. It helps us get/keep him on a schedule. Since I'm asleep when DH does some of the feedings (and vice versa), we can communicate this way without having to wake each other up to ask when he last ate, how much, etc.
We started couting mL in the hospital, but now we've switched to ounces. He's already eating between 3.5-4oz every 4 hours.
Life of mrsjanks
If that makes you a bad mom, I was one for my 1st. And I promised myself that if it comes to either pumping (I have inverted nip issues) or formula, it will be formula. I felt the same way, I was chained to the chair/pump, no sleeping and I was flat out not wanting anything to do with my precious little one. I will not do that to myself again AND I think it makes you a good mom to realize that you weren't bonding enough and chose your son. I know some people would say to keep trying, but I have been there and I applaud you for not killing yourself for a month like I did with my son!
Elijah Matthew - 5/3/07 ~ Adalyn Rosemary - 3/23/11
*Photos by Kacy Cierley*