- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Single Parents
Is it even possible to peacefully co-parent?
I'm so sick of fighting with X. Everything is a huge battle. And he isn't making DS a priority right now, yet says he wants us to be friends and have a good friendship for the purpose of raising our son together. But he always puts his new relationship first.
How exactly am I supposed to be friends with someone who treats me and my son like we are trash? And who only wants to be a parent when it's convenient?
He has suggested some family counseling for us. Is that even worth it? I would love for this to all work itself out and not have to go to court to fight for custody, but despite all his wonderful words of wanting to work this out amicably, X is still not backing it up.
I'm so tired of all of it. I'm emotionally drained from dealing with this situation and a screaming, teething baby all the time. Is it even possible to have a good relationship with your baby's father at some point?
Sorry for the rambling/incoherence. I've had maybe 2 hours of sleep at a time for the last couple of weeks. Yay teething! Not.
Breastfeeding, Co-Sleeping, Babywearing, Animal Loving Family!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Is it even possible to peacefully co-parent?
It all depends on the other parent. My experience taught me not to stress out over another person. Counseling can be very helpful if both parties are committed to it. In the end, the only person you have any control over is yourself. Don't spend precious time and energy trying to get another person to agree, understand, be honest, follow through, etc. Sometimes when you say "forget it" and start ignoring their behavior and stop arguing they act better...sometimes.
If not, give your baby all of the love you can. As your child grows older, they will see and appreciate you for all your hard work. They will also see their other parent for what they are. My 8 year old finally looks at my ex for what he is based purely on the ex's actions.
I honestly don't know.
We've been pretty peaceful, but I've been living in Germany with Jake and my ex is still in Canada. That's going to end this summer when I move back and he starts having visitation again.
We've had a few arguments already and I'm not looking forward to it. While I say we are friends, we aren't really, I have no desire to hang out with him. But we have to co-parent Jake for the rest of our lives, so I prefer to be civil.
A lot of the time, we are peaceful because I hold my tongue and let the unimportant things slide. Then I vent about it online.
My ex and I have a decent relationship where ds is concerned. I hate him and think he is an ass for cheating on me. I think he is selfish because his girlfriend (formerly mistress) is his #1 priority. I have to laugh when I read his facebook updates about what a great time he has with ds considering he sees him 8 days a month. But I don't get bitchy to keep the peace.
When ds is with him, I know he is safe. I know he is cared for. I know nothing is going to happen to him. I started taking the attitude of ex being like a free "babysitter" if you will, that I have similar views on parenting with. We tend to agree on most parenting issues which helps. So then on the nights when ds is there, I do the things I need to do. I call ds to say goodnight and let them have their time. At first it was hard, but I'm almost a year and a half out now and it certainly has been easier over time.