Babies: 9 - 12 Months

S/O Cell Phones

**I mean no disrespect to pitterpatter, it just reminded me of something I was thinking.

So in my house, we got rid of our landline. We only have our cells now because we never used the other anyway. However, I was just thinking the other day, I never talk to my FIL on the phone. In fact, I don't even have his number. Once in a while MIL calls me, but not very often. They call on DHs phone.  A lot of the time when I hear it ring I say, hey your phone's ringing, but I don't answer it.  I could if I wanted to, but same with a text message, you know? I tell him it came in but I never check it.  I don't think there's anything wrong with checking your spouses phone. I think you have every right to look at text messages if you want you or see who they've been talking to.  Now, I don't usually find time or desire to do it, but I think it should be okay at any time. Back in the "old days" when we shared a phone and we didn't text there wasn't an option of this type of privacy, so why should there be now? I think the loss of the landline/invention of cell phones has had some very negative effects on society.  And I think if I did check DHs phone, and he got all weird about it, it might cause some concern for me.   

Re: S/O Cell Phones

  • I agree 100%. DH wouldn't freak out if I checked his cell phone or vice versa, I don't do it but if I did he wouldn't care. 

    DD#1 is 3! And LO#2 is on his/her way! Due Feb 26th, 2014.

     

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    BFP#2: m/c 10/29/2012 EDD was 6/21/2012 Baby Hope was 6 weeks 3 days. 

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  • I look at DH's cell phone all the time.  He gets funny emails and texts a lot.  I also have his email passwords, but as he has said, it isn't like he would have an affair and use his regular email. 

    I don't see anything wrong with checking each others cells.  

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  • IMO anything my husband does via cell phone, email, etc. is open to me and vice versa. He shouldn't be doing anything he wouldn't want to be caught doing.

    That said... I do often look at his phone, not because I don't trust him, but just cuz I can. LOL! He would never get weirded out about me checking into things and same is true for me. He has the right to look at my phone anytime he wants. No secrets.

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  • I heck his phone all the time especially if it beeps, cuz normally its him getting his first call for the morning (his cell is for work) and sometimes hes playing with the baby or cant get it. i rarely answer it. but if i get to it first ill see hes calling and he will answer it after that. 

    his main saying is why would i go out and get koolaid when i could come home and have champagne.  im not worried about him cheating, and hes not worried about me either.

  • imagelaura_belle:

    This might be an early UO but...

    I don't feel the need to check DH's phone.  And if I did, I would begin questioning my own trust issues and what led me to the point of asking to see the phone.  I would be very offended if he asked to check mine.  I have nothing to hide and if he doesn't trust me, we have bigger issues than what is on my phone.  Both of our phones are locked and require a password to open (confidential emails, etc). 

     

    100%  Except for the passwords, we don't have those and I still feel NO need to check his phone or email.

  • We are the same way. If DH hears my phone go off, he will answer it if it someone he knows. If he doesn't know them, or it comes up as a number he doesn't know, he doesn't answer, but he will ask me who it is, and why they called. I do the same thing as well. If he hears my text message alarm go off, he will check it, and then read it to me. I do the same thing, and sometimes we will respond to texts as the other person. If one of us stopped allowing the other to do that, then it would throw up a red flag to the other one.

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  • imagemissdanib:
    imagelaura_belle:

    This might be an early UO but...

    I don't feel the need to check DH's phone.  And if I did, I would begin questioning my own trust issues and what led me to the point of asking to see the phone.  I would be very offended if he asked to check mine.  I have nothing to hide and if he doesn't trust me, we have bigger issues than what is on my phone.  Both of our phones are locked and require a password to open (confidential emails, etc). 

     

    100%  Except for the passwords, we don't have those and I still feel NO need to check his phone or email.

    Same for me.  I don't check hubby's phone/email/text and he doesn't check mine.  If the phone happens to be ringing and he can't answer, he'll ask me to answer for him and vice/versa. I know I could check it if I wanted to because it's not password protected but I don't.

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  • imagelaura_belle:

    This might be an early UO but...

    I don't feel the need to check DH's phone.  And if I did, I would begin questioning my own trust issues and what led me to the point of asking to see the phone.  I would be very offended if he asked to check mine.  I have nothing to hide and if he doesn't trust me, we have bigger issues than what is on my phone.  Both of our phones are locked and require a password to open (confidential emails, etc). 

     

    Ditto this minus the passwords.  I like having something private, and it's not like I'm talking about anything bad through texts but if I was planning a suprise (like I was with DD's Valentine's day pics,) or if I wanted to do a suprise party, etc, I don't want him to see that.  Also I talk about a lot of girly stuff to my girlfriends, and I don't necessarily want my DH to see that nor do I think he would want to.  I trust he's not doing anything shady and he trusts me that I'm not.  I have no desire to look at his texts or his phone.  I like knowing I can have private converstations with my friends through text, and yes that often times means private from DH too.  Just because we're married doesn't mean I can't have some privacy you know?  However, if for some reason there was suspicious behavior on either of our parts, I'd let him skim through texts to show that I wasn't cheating and i'm ure he would let me do the same.

     We don't have land lines either.  So sometimes if my phone is ringing and it's near him and I'm not near it, if it's someone he knows he'll shout to me and I'll tell him to answer it.  His phone is usually on him but if it rings and I know the caller I'll shout out to him who it is, and usually he just says he'll call back.  That's what VM is for haha.

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  • I don't ever read through old messages on his phone or anything like that, but if something comes in and he's washing dishes or in the shower or can't get to it, he usually just tells me to read it to him. I do the same for him. If he wasn't around and his phone was (not sure why that would ever happen) I probably wouldn't answer it because anyone that I would be interested in talking to is probably about to try my phone next anyway.

    I would never just reply to a message on his phone without him telling me what to say though. That's weird.

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  • We have complete access to eachother's phones, e-mail, facebooks, ect.  I have nothing to hide and could care less if he looked at my stuff.  Sometimes he does look and sometimes I look at his as well.  I don't really care about keeping those things private from him.  There's no point.
    Adrian 7.6.07 - ADHD, Disruptive Behavior Disorder, Learning Disability-NOS
    Cam 6.6.10 - Autism, Global Developmental Delay, Mixed Receptive/Expressive Communication Disorder
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