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Georgia Babies
andrea922
member
Moms of 2+, give it to me honestly
andrea922
member
I am starting to freak out about having this baby. Both for the labor (especially after I have been all gung ho about a natural water birth, I keep asking dh if he thinks I can do it, despite basically doing it with ds, minus the delivery in the water part) and for bringing the baby home, because I seriously don't know how ds will react. He is such a fun kid, like really enjoyable to be around and loving and I wonder what the he*l we were thinking in shaking up his life with a baby! Which I know is silly. And I wonder how hard it will be to manage both.
So, how hard is it? How did your first child react when you brought home your second? Did your second labor suck as much as your first? Am I crazy?
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Re: Moms of 2+, give it to me honestly
No idea about the labor part- both of my kids were c/s- no labor.
But as for the other part, I had a very similar panic attack a few weeks before Sophie was born. Everyone told me it was normal but that really didn't make it any better! For me, the first 8 weeks were hard as hell. For one thing, Gavin kept getting sick and would have to stay home with me and Sophie instead of going to daycare. That really impacted my recovery this time. Thank goodness Sophie was a pro at BF or else I would have had to give up. Then around 8 or 9 weeks, things suddenly clicked and the fog started to lift. By 10 weeks, I went back to work and even though that has brought its own challenges, all in all, I'm feeling much better about things and really enjoying having 2. So when it all feels insane and you think you'll never make it through, remind yourself that I said 8-10 weeks. And if your fog lifts before then, you are really doing good!
I had a sucky labor with the #1 and a c/s with #2. I've heard from friends and family that the 2nd labor and delivery is so much easier.
Also, Alec reacted so much better to Aerin than I had expected. He was so sweet with her and never acted out against her (not until she was 1 and could steal toys).
It really is so much easier with 2 kids. Eventually they will play together and make your life easier. Also, you will remember so much with #2 so taking care of the baby will be a lot easier. Biggest advice is to focus on getting #2 on a schedule as soon as you can.
Good luck!!
Labor for second one was a breeze. Only really thing that was kinda hard was thinking that I have a toddler who's staying with family and I want to be home with him soon. William was always with us and has not spent a night away from us.
We are so fortunate that William reacted really well with having a baby sister. Having two is definitely hard. I was initially consumed with guilt that I might not be giving both of my kids enough attention. Eventually we got the hang of it. Thankful for a very hands on Hubby because that helped a lot in making sure that both kids are taken care and given attention.
What also worked for us is instilling to Samantha and William that they are a team and that they need to care for each other. That has been the tune at our house since day 1 and that is all what my kids known.
You wil do great! It take sometimes getting used to it but I am confident that you all will really enjoy your family of four!
Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008
Well, I had a c-section with Jack so no real labor, but my recovery from the c-section was much more difficult for the second time around.
As for Ethan's reaction to Jack, Ethan was only 21 months old when Jack was born. Some people will probably not believe this, but we never had any issues with Ethan regarding jealousy, etc. Ethan was crazy over Jack from the beginning. I don't know if it's because Ethan was young and that's the reason it turned out fine? Who knows? All I do know is that besides your typical brotherly squabbles, they've been bff from the beginning.
As for being the mother of two kids, it's definitely a big adjustment but once I got through that first year, everything got much easier. Things seemed to get easier on me once Jack was walking. Again, some people may think that's crazy, but it really did make things easier on me. Now, having a 4 year old and a 2 year old really isn't a big deal at all. I just roll with the punches. Try not to be too worried. Everything will be fine.
Well you know my second labor was way harder, but that was by choice and I wouldn't change it for anything. But we had different experiences and I have to imagine your second labor can only be better this time around.
As far as the reaction, Evie did great. She is still great with Liam. She did act out to us a little but it was a little mix of being 2.5, us having been gone for 5 days, and the new baby. She got over it quickly but was always very loving to Liam.
Parenting two kids is a learning experience. The older kid learns to wait for what they need pretty quickly. Going out with two is overwhelming at first, but so was going out with one at first.
You are right on schedule with this freak out it seems. Finn is going to be great! Before you know it, you won't be able to remember a time when it was just Finn.
I felt the same way you do now, and they are perfectly normal feelings. Mine were so bad I nearly had an anxiety attack in the hospital over the "what have I done" thoughts. Once the hormones leveled out some I was able to see that everything was going to be just fine. Carter was 18 months when i brought home Ava, but after awhile it was hard to remember a time in our lives when she wasn't here. And he just loved her so much that I realized that giving him a sibling was one of the best things I could do for him. Sure we didn't have as much time together as we once did, but to see the two of them together now just melts my heart. They are the best of friends.
Labor for Ava was a BREEZE. Seriously, like i hardly even had to do any work. With Carter I pushed for over 3 hours. Thought I would die. Ava took less than 10 minutes. 3 pushes max.
For most people labor is easier the second time around. Your body has been trained and is also not at tight as it once was.
With chunky Colton though I had to have a c-section because he was just too big.
When Ridge first met Colton he was kinda quiet but I think it was more because he was scared about wires and IV on me. He wanted to kiss him though. When he came back again to visit he could not stop laughing at Colton. And same thing when we brought Colton home ...Ridge laughed the entire way home.
Ridge was great when we had lots of visitors but when they all left we had about three hard weeks with Ridge competing for attention and acting out but after that it became normal for him. Now they are honestly best friends. They look for each other as soon as they wake up. They hug each other all the time. And play so well together.
It is an adjustment but so worth it.
Let's see, I had my panic attack right when I found out I was pregnant so you're already doing better than I did! :-) I won't lie to you. The first few months sucked. But, I also had ppd so that didn't help. Like Stacie said, once you hit 8-10 weeks, things start to become a little easier and then like Amanda said, after the first year is when things really became easier for me.
Labor for me the second time was actually harder than the first only because it was so quick that the epidural didn't have a chance to kick in yet.
Benjamin was 20 months old when Noah was born and smack dab in the middle of the terrible twos. That being said, he was so great with Noah from the start. If Noah would be in his room crying, Benjamin would run to his door. It was very sweet. Now that Noah is older and can get into more stuff, Benjamin is being a typical big brother and being "mean" to him - not sharing, rough-housing with him, etc. However, he always has to kiss Noah good night and gets very upset if he thinks that Noah is going to go to bed without B being able to kiss him. Noah just adores his big brother too.
They still drive me crazy every single day and I wouldn't have it any other way. You are going to be great! Finn is going to be great! It's all going to fall into place and once the newborn fog lifts, you're going to realize how truly great everything turned out to be!