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What happened to my baby??

kellmokellmo member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

My DS used to be so calm and easy going. He now gets angry when he doesn't get his own way. He doesn't throw tantrums every day but he definitely has changed. Going out for dinner  w/ the whole family used to be enjoyable now it's a lot of work. I try not to get frustrated w/ him but it is exhausting, He is in daycare and his sitter says he is such a sweet boy. DS is very active and I do understand why he doesn't want to just sit of course. If someone is in face being silly or trying to kiss/hug him and if he doesn't want any parts of it he will slap them and try to push them away. He is a very loving child but if he's not into it he has no problem explaining that.

I sometimes feel clueless at how to discipline him. Ugh this terrible 2/ toddler stage is no fun! LOL! Has anyone experienced this? Anyone have any suggestions? Any good books on discipline you have read? 

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Re: What happened to my baby??

  • Princess_LilyPrincess_Lily member

    We haven't read any books, but your LO sounds like ours.

    Our LO is what you would call a hyper sensitive toddler.  He's sensitive, extremley intelligent and persistant.  For DH and I we know what our LO wants, what evvironments he will handle well in and how long he will handle them, because we learned more about him and his cues than the basic needs of a young baby.  Its harder for him to communicate to others though, which lead to frusteration.

    Learn your DSs cues, what he will handle, what he wont.  What he wants vs. what you need to be done.    

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  • iumegan716iumegan716
    DS is the same way.  I started to read Happiest Toddler on the Block but after talking about it with the pediatrician at his 15 month check-up, the dr said that the strategies in that book are not appropriate for DS's age.  He suggested we ignore his tantrums, but that is hard for us, especially in public at a restaurant or something.  Distraction still works some of the time.  We've cut back on going out to eat because DS just can't really tolerate it well anymore.
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  • Princess_LilyPrincess_Lily member

    imageiumegan716:
    DS is the same way.  I started to read Happiest Toddler on the Block but after talking about it with the pediatrician at his 15 month check-up, the dr said that the strategies in that book are not appropriate for DS's age.  He suggested we ignore his tantrums, but that is hard for us, especially in public at a restaurant or something.  Distraction still works some of the time.  We've cut back on going out to eat because DS just can't really tolerate it well anymore.

    If DS doesn't cooperate in public, we say, "If you don't behave you are going in the stroller/in the car and we're going home."

    Yes, having a public tantrum is embarassing, but the above has helped me focus on the "next step" if the tantrum continues.

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  • sapphire angelsapphire angel member

    I ignore the tantrums at home so long as she's not in danger of hurting herself. If she is, I move her or remove the danger then let her scream it out while i go back to chores or cooking. Above all I do not give her whatever it is she is in a temper about. Ex gave in on one of his Saturdays and the following Saturdays have been hard on him.

    Public temper tantrums have gotten to be a pattern, I let LO throw herself down and scream. She then looks at me when she stops to get a breath and I say "what a pitiful baby you are. " I get a 'go to he_ _' look then she gets up and goes along with whatever it is we were doing. That's about 80% of the time. If that doesn't happen, then usually I have gone beyond LO's tolerance for the situation or environment so I change it (usually by leaving the store and going home - I'll eventually start what a PP did and start saying "If you do this, then we go home"). 

    Slapping, biting and head slamming are time out behaviors now for us. 3 months of redirecting and "nice hands" did not work and spurred more aggressive behavior. Other behaviors such as messing with the oven or dishwasher are still being redirected and after the second time the baby gate goes up and she throws a tantrum in front of the gate. The gate will come down about 1-2 hours later when she's forgotten about the oven or dishwasher

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  • Hulahoop1234Hulahoop1234

    imageiumegan716:
    DS is the same way.  I started to read Happiest Toddler on the Block but after talking about it with the pediatrician at his 15 month check-up, the dr said that the strategies in that book are not appropriate for DS's age.  He suggested we ignore his tantrums, but that is hard for us, especially in public at a restaurant or something.  Distraction still works some of the time.  We've cut back on going out to eat because DS just can't really tolerate it well anymore.

    I have to strongly disagree with this.  The author, Dr. Karp, recommends starting at 9 months to 1 year to set yourself up for success.  We started with HTOTB at 11 months old and it works very well for DS at this stage.  It doesn't sound like your pedi has actually read the book.  

    I would highly recommend HTOTB and the Dr. Sears Discipline Book.  

     

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