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Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
No heartbeat today...
I think I am still numb... I had my 8 week ultrasound this morning and there was no heartbeat. I've had no bleeding and no cramping. I don't want to believe it. I should have been prepared... I am overweight, have PCOS and am prediabetic...I was having weekly ultrasounds from week 4 and they said the sac was too small last week and thats why they were rechecking. I don't want to go through this at work or at home so I have scheduled for a d&c friday morning. My husband seemed pretty upset that I decided this on my own...I kind of gave it all to him at once too.
I think he understands, as do friends who have been through a loss, that I have to have the D&C.
My mind is racing a mile per minute...thanks for letting me vent.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: No heartbeat today...
::hugs:: I'm sorry you're here, but vent all you need. I hope you find support and hope here, as I have.
Clomid + Met = BFP#1 12/27/10, missed MC discovered 2/9/11, d&c 2/11/11, 10w3d
Natural cycle (just Met) = BFP#2 6/3/11, Baby A arrived 2/16/12
<a href="http://s1091.photobucket.com/albums/i390/tlneff0108/?action=view
I'm so sorry for your loss. I also have PCOS and also discovered the missed miscarriage at 8 weeks. I had my D&C about 2 weeks ago (I also made this decision on my own. I just couldn't imagine waiting for it to pass naturally). The D&C is much more of an emotional process than a physical one. As hard as it was, the silver lining for me was that I was able to get pregnant, something I wasn't sure of before (I tried a few medications before finding one that worked). That is what my doctor kept stressing, and it's true. It didn't make it easier to think of this at first, but it's helping more now. Take some time for yourself and allow yourself to grieve.
Lots of hugs,
Jill
Same thing for me... I went to hear the heartbeat via Doppler at 9 weeks they couldnt find it.. they rescheduled me for 11weeks still no heartbeat so they had an ultrasound done.... the baby only measured 7weeks... after we heard a strong heartbeat at 6weeks5days... I am still numb.... I go tomorrow to find out when I am scheduling my D&C. I just want to be back to my prepregnancy self.. I am still having all of my pregnancy symptoms... which makes it even harder to deal with.
(((hugs)))
BFP #1 10/02/06, EDD 5/1/07 Natural Miscarriage 1 week after BFP
BFP #2 3/28/07, EDD 11/19/07 Natural Miscarriage 2 weeks after BFP
BFP #3 1/16/11, 1st U/S - 1/28/11 HR 132bpm, Missed Miscarriage- 2/28/11, D&C 3/8/11
March 2011, diagnosed with MTHFR gene mutation
"Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about You, but since I didn't get the chance, would You please hold them on Your lap and tell them about me?
BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6d
Bethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.
I am so sorry for your loss. I too, found out I was losing our baby at 8 weeks.
I did want to say though, just because you have the health problems you listed does not mean that is what caused this to happen. Sometimes, when the fetus is "looking" for chromosomes or genetic material, it just isn't there. I don't mean to take away from what you are saying, but I am worried it sounds like you are blaming yourself and I want you to know that it is not your fault. You deserve to have a sticky baby just like everyone else on this board.
I had a natural miscarriage because of the timing with my bleeding starting and the ultrasounds (kind of a long story), but the waiting was torture. I completely understand why you would elect for a D&C.
Much luck to you, you will be in my thoughts.
I completely agree. Please do not blame yourself. I'm so sorry for your loss.
PGAL/PAL welcome
BFP #2 9.12.12, EDD 5.24.13, Baby Boy Born 5.15.13!!
My Ovulation Chart
3 Clomid (100mg) cycles + TI + Trigger = BFN's, Femara + Trigger + IUI#1 = BFN
Femara + Trigger + IUI#2 = BFP!
"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." ~Gandhi
I asked my doctor if women with PCOS are more likely to miscarry, and he said no. Do not blame yourself. Nothing you did caused this to happen.
thank you so much...I guess I do feel like i failed my baby. I am mad at myself, at God, at the ultrasound tech, at my job. I ask was it the antibiotic I had to take or the drink I had the night before I took the pregnancy test or the one time I let myself have a frosty. I'm just so disappointed in it all.
I am really trying to look at the whole picture and that we can try again so soon and that something was wrong and it's natures way.
I have made my D&C appointment for tomorrow morning, and I have to drag myself out of bed today to go to the pre op.
thank you again and coming on here is helping me feel like someone else has survived this.
I am not near overweight, and have no known conditions and the same happened to me. This isn't your fault. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry for your loss!! 7 months ago, I went for a routine visit @ 18 weeks and they couldn't find her hb. I had no signs or symptoms and was feeling just fine. My husband is in the military and was away doing training. I had to call and give it to him all at once too.
I actually asked him if he was mad at me for deciding on my own to have the surgical procedure over an induction. He said at first he was but now he isn't. He said his anger was probably just some misplaced grief over the loss of our baby. This may be the situation with your DH. It's tough news. On one hand you have to process the loss of your child and then you have to process the fact that your wife is having a surgical procedure. I can understand that, especially since men are reared to be so strong. It's not your fault and you shouldn't feel guilty for it.