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Hawaii Babies
redshoegirl
member
leaving your LO overnight?
redshoegirl
member
At what age would you be willing to leave your LO overnight - either at your house with a relative/babysitter/whatever or at someone else's house?
Ben and I have different ideas on this, so I'm curious what other people think. He thinks they're getting old enough now that if we really wanted to take a short overnight (like a weekend) trip somewhere, we could. I, on the other hand, am all "OMGWTFBBQ they're my babies and I can't leave them overnight are you crazy???" 
Then again, I'll probably feel the same way when they're 12, so I totally understand that I may not have the most realistic point of view here lol. I read a post from a mama recently on another board where she said she and her husband went on a 2 or 3 night trip when their LO was about 8 weeks old (the baby stayed with a grandparent), and I simply couldn't imagine that.
I think part of the reason I wouldn't be willing to do it is because we'd most likely get the ILs to watch them, and I know they'd want to do it at their house. Which I completely understand since I hate sleeping in other peoples' homes, but I'd be worried the entire time that Will and Dash would be stressed and crying and not sleeping well if they weren't in their own cribs in their own room.
So I think I'd consider leaving them for one night at our home at a year old or so, but they'd probably have to be a few years old before I'd be cool with them spending the night elsewhere.
Your thoughts?
Note: this doesn't include traveling for work, since presumably your H would be home at night with your LO. This is a hypothetical where both of you would be gone on a mini-vacation or similar.
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Re: leaving your LO overnight?
We let him spend the night at my parents' house every once in a while, starting at about 7 months old? Not sure the exact age, but it was last fall sometime. Since then he has spent the night 3 more times.
I personally didn't feel comfortable leaving him before that just because he was still eating so frequently through out the night and I just felt like he *needed* to wake up beside me/DH. I had already left him overnight for work by the time I finally took my mom up on her offer. I think it has been for a late football game, a wedding, and work party - not sure I could really leave him for a few day vacation yet. Thinking about it for a 2 night getaway we have scheduled in June just because it's at a casino and it would be nice to get to spend time as a couple and not worry about where a baby can/can't go w/in the building but we are still thinking about it.
He sleeps in my old room in a pack n play and my mom usually sleeps in the same room. They live 30 or so mins. away so I wouldn't feel comfortable asking her to come put him down at our house because she would have to drive home so late at night. Usually we meet up for breakfast the next day after we get to sleep in :ahhh, bliss:
We left Elyse overnight for one night with my MIL when she was about 8 months old. MIL came to our house so E could still be in her own bed.
That first trip away was bitter sweet. It was really nice to be away with MH for a night (we went to a concert in Vancouver). But I couldn't stop thinking about Elyse.
The next trip away was better.
We've never left her overnight at either of our parent's houses. I feel like it is easier for Elyse to be in her own surroundings. That will probably be the next step for us though.
Married Bio
Um we haven't... she's 19 months old
She stayed at my SIL's when DH and I went to a concert in the fall (she was probably about 14 months old) and we picked her up right after it was over. My SIL put her to bed there and we woke her up and brought her home, that said, she's napped at my SIL's for daycare since she was 3 months old so I knew she would go to sleep without issues. My mom has offered to keep her overnight and I said no 
I see no reason for her to stay the night with someone "just because", if we were going on vacation it would be different but I don't really see us doing that for um... ever! 
J/k maybe someday but for now, she's part of us and where we go, she goes. That might seem excessive but it's really how we both feel.
So basically the first time she'll be left with someone overnight is when we give birth to Grayson. I'm really sad and torn up about it honestly, I know it's crazy but it's true. Depending on the time of day and who's around will depend on what happens. If it's the middle of the night, we have several people that haev offered to come here and stay with her. If we give birth/go into labor during the day, we'll take her to my SIL's since that's her normal routine (daycare) and if need be, she can stay the night there. That's the ONLY place I would allow her to spend the night because I know she's comfortable there. My SIL also has 2 daughters (one that's 2 and the other is 1) so Bella is right in the middle of those two and adores them. Otherwise, Ryan can come home, put her to bed and then someone will sleep over at our house. She typically sleeps from 7pm-630am... so we'll see.
We left LO overnight at MIL's house a few weekends ago. She was 3.5 months old then. It was the weekend before Valentines day. I was actually the one who suggested the idea to DH. We went to a bday party close to the IL's house (they live 45 mins away from us) so I told DH, since we were already in their area, we can leave LO there and come back and get her the next day. Of course, we checked with MIL prior and she said she did not mind at all. She was actualy excited to watch LO and play with her. We dropped LO off around 6-7 pm on a Saturday so it was close to her bedtime. We brought our moses basket where LO can sleep (we could've brought our pack and play but changed our mind last minute), her bath tub, her activity mat, her bumbo and a couple of small toys
. MIL fed her and gave her a bath which she did not mind at all. We made sure that she still followed her bedtime routine eventhough she's not in our house. DH and I checked in at a hotel, had dinner and hung out with friends. It was nice to have some alone time and eat dinner without having to stress out that LO will soon wake up from her nap and we have to hurry up eating! lol. Funny thing though was half the time we were having dinner, we talked about LO and looked at her pictures in our camera lol. We were worried that LO will give MIL a hard time like she did the first time she babysat (in our house) her when she was 9 wks old (We had to go to a party for a couple of hours. LO was so tired and was freakin out). Surprisingly, she did REALLY well this time. MIL said she was an angel and hardly cried :-). She slept from 9 pm to 8 am (woke up at 5 am to eat). I guess sometimes you just never know what our LOs are capable of doing. That said, I do not have any worries with MIL watching LO so that makes the decision of leaving her overnight easier. Also, it helps that she's been sleeping through the night now. If she isn't sleeping through the night yet, we wouldn't feel comfortable leaving her with MIL (or with anybody) and have them get up every couple of hours at night to feed her.
Actually I thought THIS is prob the main reason why I'd be uncomfortable. If we left B overnight (which we also haven't yet), I'd be more comfortable if it was at our home.
I will be leaving Libby for the first next week for a 5 day/4 night work trip. Still, she'll be home with daddy and grandma. That said, I am a wreck about it. I've never been away from her for longer than 18 hours! I am sure she'll be fine though...save for not being able to nurse. When she signs for milk to my mom or J, they offer her my milk in a cup. If she doesn't want it then they figure she just wants to cuddle and then get in the rocker with her blanket and rock with her.
J and I are thinking our wedding anniversary will be a good time to try a night away. That'll be at the end of September and she'll be 21 months. We'd leave her at home, with my mom (who lives with us and watches her daily). We're thinking of just doing a local inn or B&B, that way we're close to home if need be. My mom is the only person we'd be comfortable leaving her overnight with...and only for one or two nights. So we shall see, we could really use the time away, just the two of us!
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I don't think there is a set age but it would be more about STTN consistently...and not the 5-6 hrs STTN but regularly 10-12 hrs. i wouldn't want her to wake up in the middle of the night and not have me there for her.
we haven't ever left her w/someone else overnight yet. the most we've done is put her to bed and then gone out for a date night and then come home
I think I would be totally fine right now leaving her overnight w/our babysitter (we don't live near family), since she is used to her and I know that she does fine w/her when she puts her to bed. I would never want to leave her w/someone until I knew that she was ok being put to bed by that person....otherwise it could be a very long night for the both of them!
I'm not sure at what age I'd be ok with leaving her for more than 1 night. Maybe when she is old enough to understand what I'm telling her when I tell her that I am leaving for a few nights and coming back??? oh and I would only be ok w/it if it was at our house where she was familiar w/her surroundings. It would be too stressful for me to leave her somewhere else - I'm sure it wouldn't be so bad for her (she seems to adjust ok sleeping in new places when we're on trips) but I would just be worried the whole time
Jaime & Brent
Oahu, Hawaii | Sept. 9, 2005
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We haven't yet, and he's almost 16 months. I usually put him to bed myself, but my husband has always been there.
In a few weeks, however, I will be driving 5 hrs to a wedding shower (I'm a BM) and I'm going to stay over at my mom's. It will be the first time I will not be sleeping in bed with him. MH has the ILs coming to help as reinforcements since I will be gone all day Sat and prob be home by noon on Sunday. I've never been away from him this long before, and I'm not sure I'll like it!
MH is thinking the worst - the last time I wasn't in bed with him was when I had to go to the hospital via ambulance in Dec - LB watched me get in and get taken away, and he cried/screamed for 3 straight hours until he fell asleep from exhaustion. MH is expecting a repeat.
If my parents were closer, I'd probablynot be worried about him spending the night there once we get him to sleep in his crib, but since we still co-sleep, I don't know that we can leave him with someone else!