pre-labor and condescension (vent--long)
michael and megan
member
So I'm a first timer. My last exam (Friday) I was 2 cm and 70% effaced. Last night (Saturday) I was having pretty intense contractions that were three minutes apart and lasted for a minute or two each. I had them like that for more than an hour with no slow down or drop in intensity no matter what I did--ate, drank, sat and rested, sat in a warm bath, laid down... I could still talk through them, but they were intense enough that I really couldn't say much without losing focus on what I was trying to say. DH called the hospital and a really bored-sounding nurse asked me a bunch of questions and told me to come in. So we went.
When we got there, my contractions had slowed some. By the time they got me on the monitor in triage, the contractions were nearly gone. The nurse did the most painful internal I've ever had--she really jammed her hand in there and jerked stuff around like she was mad at me for being there. When the doctor came in, he was really condescending, telling me that contractions should "hurt" and I shouldn't come in unless they were really painful. I thought the rule was 5-1-1, and I was sitting at 3-1-1. He acted like I was just making it all up. I was so angry by the time we left. I don't know why doctors and nurses can't just try to be understanding about this! It's discouraging for those of us who have to go home without a baby and it's not like we're trying to inconvenience them! I'm working on knowing the difference between labor and pre-labor, but I've never done this before, so give me a break!
End of rant.
Re: pre-labor and condescension (vent--long)
I'm sorry about that experience
Were you able to see someone from your practice? One of the midwifes from the practice I was seeing was always on call and even though it was the one I hadn't met, she was still nicer than the staff.
It's hard to know when it's "real" even if you've already done it before...every labor is different. The first time I went into the hospital it was the middle of night and I was 1cm and maybe 70% effaced. I'd been having contractions for hours and was too nervous to stay home. We ended up leaving the hospital around 7:00am - we were back by 4:00pm I had my baby at 10:00pm. I didn't feel that much different the second time I went in, but when they checked me I was 5cm so sometimes you just need to go with your gut and heck with what anyone else says about it.
Thanks for the encouragement, ladies! I'm feeling better about things now and have spent a lot of time re-reading about labor signs, so hopefully I'll be able to discern a little better next time.
I didn't get to see a doctor from my practice when we went in, so I know that was part of the problem. The hospital we chose has a separate triage with nurses and doctors that aren't part of my practice, which I didn't know before Saturday night. Next time, I think I'll be confident to be more assertive with the nurses and doctors when we go in. I don't plan to allow them to treat me like that again.