TTC After a Loss

My SIL can kiss my ___!!! (Sorry long vent)

Some of you know my history of my SIL who had a baby with barely a job, living with MIL, on BCP with a one night stand.  Some of you remember the nasty email she sent DH and I before her baby was born...basically telling us how crappy we've been to her and that "it's not like I'm having N___ to spite you." Yada Yada Yada....

You'll also remember how we babysat for her right before Christmas (which would have been our 1st baby's 1st Christmas and a month after our 2nd loss) and how I held her baby crying thinking about this and how she wrote on DH's twitter, "N___'s been sleeping through the night for a month now and M___ (DH) babysits for the first time and N___'s up at 3am....BABYSITTER=FAIL!!!"

There has been some other things, but tonight topped it off.....  Here it goes....

We went to dinner with DH's family for his GM's birthday.  SIL's baby wanted out of his carrier.  I wasn't too hungry and was done eating.  She needed help cutting her steak cause she was holding baby.  I offered to hold him since I was done eating.  He started crying because he wanted his mom.  We were by the exit so I got up and took him outside.  He stopped crying as soon as we went outside and we window shopped while everyone else finished eating.  No big deal....right....well, that's what I thought!!!

When we got in the car and barely drove off, DH was pissed.  He said, "My sister is a f'ing b___ and you have my permission to NEVER do anything or help her with anything ever again!!!"  I was dumbfouded.  He said she was mad and upset at me for doing that.  She was saying, "I am NOT ok with her doing that."  "I am not comfortable with her taking him outside like that."  WTF?!?!?

I started crying thinking about how I've been getting BFNs and probably starting injections next month and how much trying for a baby this way SUCKS and how she got pregnant on BCP with a one night stand!!!  DH grabbed my hand and was very sympathetic...which usually he doesn't get it when I get upset about things.

MIL and DH couldn't believe she was acting like that.  DH said she was making a huge A___ out of herself in front of everyone.  He said MIL just looked at her with a "WTF" look on her face.

I am so mad and upset right now.  I have never said anything to her about the email or the twitter or anything.  I have always tried to be a good SIL and be sympathic to her situation and be the better person by thinking "I get to have my DH to help and support me.  I get to go to bed with DH every night...she sleeps in a room in her mother's house with her son...that is it."  NO MORE!!!  She deserves EVERYTHING she gets and more!!!

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1st pregnancy: BFP- 6/28/09 - Found out we lost our little girl on 10/9/09 at 19w 4d - D&E- 10/14/09

June 2010, corrective surgery for Septate Uterus and large fibroids

2nd pregnancy: BFP- 10/18/10 - Slow rising, non-doubling HCGs, no heart beat. Non-viable pregnancy, D&C- 11/12/10

Started Metformin 6/30/11, Started Clomid 7/20/11 - Unsuccessful

HSG and Laparoscopic surgery revealed blocked tubes and lots of scar tissue...IVF here we come!!!

Surprise BFP naturally!!! IT'S A BOY!!!

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Re: My SIL can kiss my ___!!! (Sorry long vent)

  • I am so sorry honey. I don't understand how people can take having a baby as a piece of jewlery or something. LIke she is the queen of all things. who died and made her queen? Ru Paul?

    (((hugs)))

    She sucks.

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  • I'm so sorry she couldnt see your kind beautiful action of help for what it was
  • wow ..just ..hmm wow I have no words..well I do have words but I may get banned if I say them I am SO sorry she treated you that way {{{HUGS}}}
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  • Wow! I'm so sorry! She is a huge biatch! Sounds to me like she is just really insecure because she knows she doesn't deserve that baby! And she knows you two will make better parents!

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  • I can't stand the people who pull the "poor me" thing all of the time when everything is handed to them.  It was extremely nice of you to help out with babysitting and with taking the baby outside to give her some peace and quiet.  I realize that she's a family member but I agree with DH.  SIL is a B____ and you shouldn't feel bad at all if you never speak to her again, much less help her out.  I'm so sorry she made you fele so horrible... {HUGS}
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  • What an a$$!!! You really don't need to put up with that. Someone needs to put her in her place. If you want me to come over there and do it for you, just let me know!
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  • Wow I cant believe her. Im sorry. (((Hugs)))

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  • Wow, she deserves a big ol' crotch punch.  You are a saint for not having said anything already.  I can't believe what she posted online and everything else she has done.  ((hugs))  great big ones.
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  • wow, i am sorry you have to deal with that crap! i know from helping a few friends that anything that makes life a tad easier (helping with the baby while she eats) should be a good thing and it should be appreciated.  her baby was safe the entire time! i doubt you took him outside in a blizzard. she needs to get over herself
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  • I am so sorry.  I'm so glad you have your DH to support you...it sounds like she really showed her true colors tonight.  (((HUGS)))
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  • imagejessieLMK:
    wow, i am sorry you have to deal with that crap! i know from helping a few friends that anything that makes life a tad easier (helping with the baby while she eats) should be a good thing and it should be appreciated.  her baby was safe the entire time! i doubt you took him outside in a blizzard. she needs to get over herself
    Ha!!!!  We live in Texas girl...it was in the upper 70's today and 72 right now!!! 
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    GEAUX TIGERS!!!

    1st pregnancy: BFP- 6/28/09 - Found out we lost our little girl on 10/9/09 at 19w 4d - D&E- 10/14/09

    June 2010, corrective surgery for Septate Uterus and large fibroids

    2nd pregnancy: BFP- 10/18/10 - Slow rising, non-doubling HCGs, no heart beat. Non-viable pregnancy, D&C- 11/12/10

    Started Metformin 6/30/11, Started Clomid 7/20/11 - Unsuccessful

    HSG and Laparoscopic surgery revealed blocked tubes and lots of scar tissue...IVF here we come!!!

    Surprise BFP naturally!!! IT'S A BOY!!!

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers

  • ((hugs)) so sorry you have to deal with her.

    Jenn

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  • ((Hugs)) I'm so sorry. She needs throat punched and a reality check.
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  • That is awful.  I am so sorry you have to deal with someone like that, especially someone who is in your family.  You obviously have a very loving and kind heart and it's too bad that she cannot recognize the pain you have gone through but the kindness you have offered her nonetheless. 
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  • I'm so sorry! Thank goodness your DH is so self and family aware! This story just proves to me what a great mom you are going to be some day really soon!

    In the meantime, for your SIL....

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  • imagetheresat858:
    Wow what a FH twatwaffle.  {{{hugs}}}}

    I like this (i need to use that word this week)...  Sorry you had to endure that and like prev. post, highly doubt it was horrible weather conditions.. she should be grateful to have someone like you in her family....  Yeah for DH and a huge BUG for her!!

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  • I am so sorry she seems to have half a brain and could no be greatful that you let her eat her damn food!!!  ((((HUGS)))) to you and for her:

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  • Oh honey - that is just terrible.  I can't believe she would act like that - there is no excuse for her behavior.  Why would she care that you occupied her baby so she could eat?  What a nut. 

    I hope and pray that you will get your sticky baby soon.  You deserve it so much!! 

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  • *hugs*  What a stupid cvnt!  There aren't enough insults in the english language for her.  That FH better STFU, or I'm going to go over there and give her a vag-punch/throat punch combo deal.
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  • Wow. I can't believe your SIL. I would be so angry. I'm glad your DH is angry too.

    And this...

    imagehappygolucky0505:

     image

    ...totally made my night. LOL!

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  • ((HUGS)) I agree with pp, it sounds like she's really insecure.  She probably sees how good you are with the LO and it makes her feel inadequate with her lack of skills.  I'm sorry that you have to bear the brunt of her insecurities.  You are a wonderful, understanding and helpful SIL to a woman who is a complete moron.  ((More HUGS))

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  • Oh dear.  I'm really sorry- I can't believe she was talking about you behind your back like that.
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