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3rd Trimester
Friend made me feel guilty about not getting new furniture for baby
We are moving DD from the nursery to her own big girl room. I'm having so much fun picking things out for DD's room. I was telling my friend her how we were planning on leaving the nursery as is for the new baby. All the furniture I had in the nursery was hand-me downs from my SIL and MIL. I was disappointed that we couldn't afford to buy everything new for DD. All I picked out for the nursery was the bedding and the glider rocker.
My friend told me that for her 2nd son she bought new furniture because she was the youngest in her family and always got hand-me-downs. She didn't want her son to feel 2nd rate because he had his brother's furniture.
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Re: Friend made me feel guilty about not getting new furniture for baby
We are doing the same thing in terms of keeping the nursery as the nursery and moving DS.
LO will never know or care! They really are just going to beat it up anyway! Save the money now so when your LOs are old enough to actually have preferences, they could pick out new furniture if it is needed in the future.
Oh, and DS's big boy room is actually featuring the furniture that DH grew up with! Could we afford new furniture, sure, but what is the point? It if works, is safe, and is only going to get nicked, scratch and colored on, I am fine with it.
I'm keeping all of DS furniture the same for the nursery. Then my parents gave me my little brothers old furniture so now DS has that set. I don't see anything wrong with reuseing the furniture Your DD needs Big girl stuff and that will also make her feel like a big girl i know it made my DS feel like a big boy.
Um. I haven't changed a single thing about my nursery from #1. #3 will use the same blue and brown stuff, even if she is a girl. lol
Babies don't care. Your friend is strange.
My boys share a room right now and are using the same beds DH and BIL used as children, as well as the same quilts. I think it's special.
In fact, 95% of our furniture has been handed down to us from family.
We're doing something similar. DS moved into what was our spare room and we got him new bedding, a new bookshelf/toy shelf and put up some of DH's posters and such (Star Wars "theme").
The baby is not going to care what his room looks like. We're putting together DS1's crib for in there today, keeping the rocker and dresser that were already in there, along with NOT painting the room. The only new thing in there is I got some new crib sheets. I never bought a bedding set for DS1, only sheets and dust ruffle.
OP- Stop feeling guilty. Who cares!!! Your baby won't know or ever care. EVER!
And as for this post about a $2,000 crib...that is ridiculous. We make much more than $100K a year together. We probably spent half that amount on everything for our baby. Why waste money like that? I just don't get it.
There are SO many things that I look back on and say, "What a waste of $!" Although I want to go out and buy the world again for the new baby, I know that I can use the $ better. Don't let someone make you feel down about handmedowns. In the end, what you do give your children comes from the heart and not just from a shopping bag "just because."
Pfft. #2 will be using all the furniture that #1 used.
And if either of them have an issue with this when they are older, I will remind them that it wasn't "their" furniture, it was "mine". I just let them use it.
Shame on your friend. There is nothing wrong with using what you already have if it works perfectly fine. Our baby is using a bureau that was my husbands fathers when he was a child. It is in perfect condition and the quality of the craftsmanship could not be replicated today unless we went very high end.
Babies don't care about what they sleep in they care that someone loves, changes, and feeds them.
Good one I will be using this for my girls if they ever complain!!
Almost all our furniture is hand me down. Lo's crib is new but only b/c DD's crib (which was handed down from my aunt's kids) was recalled last year. She has DH's old dresser and my old toy box. Our rocker is handed down also, But I bought a new cushion for it. When we have the next baby Lo will share a room with DD, and the nursery will stay the same.
IMG]http://i39.tinypic.com/qpqv84.jpg[/IMG]
Patiently waiting for little brother!
Baby furniture is one thing that is gently used and why would you get all new for your new LO when you already have it. Will the baby really know...really.
I could see buy new for you 2nd when they out grow the baby stuff but why spend the money when you don't have to.
I would rather get my baby new when they got older and really knew it was their new furniture.
if your friend is that worried....offer to let her buy the new baby furniture...lol
DS #2 got DS#1's nursery as it was too. I updated it with new photos of ds#2 and some personalized stuff with ds#2's name/initials. It's really cute.
My little sister once told me she loved getting my hand-me-downs her whole life. I was 2.5 yrs older and she thought my stuff was so cool
The new baby will be using the furniture my mother used for basically her whole life. After probably 50 years of using her dressers she bought new ones and saved her old pieces for me. We stripped it all down to stain to give it a more masculine and updated look and that's about it. Older furniture is better IMO since I think it's typically of a better quality. My furniture has been mine for the last 33 years and it just too feminine for either of my boys but maybe one day one of them will have a daughter
Nothing wrong with using what you already have, it's so much less wasteful also!
This exactly! Yeah I'm sure when the baby is 13 she won't want hand-me-down clothes, but the crib?? I plan to use mine for all future babies, and then the last one will get to have in converted. I'm not buying a new crib for every baby! That's insane! Maybe a new bedding set, My older child can keep hers and take it to her new room. Please don't stress about this!
We plan on reusing our crib when we have a second child and LO's dresser is a hand-me-down from DH's grandpa. The baby doesn't care about what furniture is used anyhow and if they resent you years later for reusing furniture they have bigger issues to worry about.
DD2: February 2014
I wouldn't feel guilty about not getting new furniture for your second baby. That woman is just trying to make herself sound inferior or something. Basically kids get hand-me-downs. My first baby is getting hand-me-downs. I really don't think it's a big deal. It's not like you aren't ever going to not buy your second child something ya know?
I don't think the furniture matters at all. Like PPs said, once the kiddos are old enough to have preferences for their clothes and bedding and such, then it would be nice to get the second one some new things that fit his requests, but I wouldn't worry about it before then.
The one thing I would do is be sure to take as many pictures and document his milestones and such as enthusiastically as you did with the first. My parents slacked a bit on that, and when it became really apparent while putting together a MASSIVE family album a few years ago (covering 60 years of photos), I did my best to minimize how obvious that was to my little sister. She was still a bit hurt by it, though, I believe.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
We bought new furniture for our baby (it's the first baby in our family in a really long time), but I can tell you that almost every other single piece of furniture in our house is a hand-me-down from my parents...I am still using the bedroom furniture I picked out as a 10 year old ( 2 dressers), and DH is using the furniture he inherited from his grandpa. Our coffee table is from my best friend.
I really would like to buy "grown up" furniture one day, but seeing as how my house is on the eclectic side, I'm happy to just paint things for now and pretend they are new.
Furniture is expensive so don't feel guilty for not buying new. Your baby doesn't know the difference.
I agree with pp, don't worry about it until they are old enough to care. Of course no teenager ( this seems to be when they "care") wants used stuff ALL the time...When that happens, you just show them how to be creative! The hope is that you have raised them to understand the worth of a dollar and thankfullness.
I can't remember ever having new furniture when I was growing up. If it wasn't handed down, it was purchased at a second hand store. My mom taught me to be creative and showed me how to find good quality "used" furniture and make it my own. After we were finished with it, (whatever "it" was) it was new to me. I am greatfull that my parents did their best to provide the things that I needed or wanted. Ultimately, your children will understand how to make there very best out of their money and be happy with it, while her's will probably throw a fit when they can't have everything brand new!
We liked two different style cribs, but one was decidedly feminine. We ended up purchasing the gender neutral furniture because we want to be able to use it for future children.
I think it's a waste of money for families to purchase all new things for every child that they have. I'd rather tell my middle and last born children that I invested the money that I could have spent on new furniture in their college/wedding funds.
BFP #1 9/7/10, EDD 5/14/11, Violet born 5/27/11.
BFP #2 4/9/12, EDD 12/16/12, M/C Rory 4/24/12.
BFP #3 10/6/12, EDD 6/16/12., Matilda born 6/17/13.