How do you feel about honorific names?

braveangel2 · February 2011

Names that honor another person in your life, whether it's family or not. After going through our family trees, I came to the conclusion that...

1) Any person I want to honor didn't have that great a name (my mom is the exception)

2) Any person that had a good name was a bit of an jerk in real life

3) I'm not comfortable naming using a name from the family tree if I've never met them just in case they were jerks.

4) There are no non-family members I want to honor with a name.

How do you approach honorific names? Does anyone else feel this way?

Jermysgirl · February 2011

Most people think my daughter's name is awful but because my Aunt Edith was so important to me, the name is beautiful and has deep meaning for me. And it doesn't matter what other people think, it's what matters to H and I.

JaysonandKristin · February 2011

I feel like it doesn't matter what the name is, if the person is of great importance to you, you honor them by using their name. Not a derivative or your creative take on their name... their name.

Both MNs this time around, June and Arthur, are family names. While my great-grandmother's name was Jewel, she only ever went by June, so I felt it appropriate to use her everyday name rather than her given name.

*Chicken* · February 2011

I'm naming one of my triplets after my mom and grandma who both died in 2009. I think as long as the name has special meaning to YOU it doesnt matter what other people think. If I liked a name that a jerky family member had I might still use the name but not to honor the jerk and I'd make that well known to the jerk.

braveangel2 · February 2011

Thanks everyone - keep the comments coming!

I think that's what it comes down to for me - I'm vain when it comes to names. In the grand scheme of things popularity, flow, sound and overall appeal outrank honorofics on my list. My mom is really the only one I'd want to honor, and I like her first name, but she doesn't care one way or another, and I feel I honor her more by being a loving family member and passing on her values.

Sometimes I feel like I'm trying to put a square peg in a round hole.

Oh, and to the previous poster - I think you got an awesome family name in Edith.

laurynfaerie · February 2011

I don't really like honorific names. Partly because all THREE of my names are after someone. My grandfather, great-grandmother, and mom's best friend (I have called her aunt since I could talk) The only one that is a derivitive instead of the proper name is my first name, Lauryn instead of Lorne. Not that anyone in my family pronounces it differently, except my parents and sister.

brideandbreve · February 2011

My husband and I are using family names for our future kids.

Our first son will have my father's name, Patrick, for a middle name. My dad died 6 years ago and it's our way of honoring him and his awesomeness.

If we have another son, he'll have the middle name Paul, which is passed down as a middle name on DH's side.

Our first daughter will have our own take on my grandmother's name, Eva Irene, but since my grandmother hated Eva and went by Irene, we're switching out Eva for another "E" name that we love. My grandmother was my kindred spirit and I was her only granddaughter, so it's been known in the family since I was old enough to talk about baby names that I'd use Irene if I had a girl someday.

I won't lie that I think Irene is a little old fashioned, but I love it so much because of the association to my grandmother.

Honestly, I love when baby names are significant because they honor someone special to the parents, whether it's a family member or a friend. Even if the names are old fashioned or not in style, I find them charming.

alohamora · February 2011

I never used to think that honorific names were a big deal (by that I mean, I never thought I'd name my children after family members) until my MIL died. She was a great woman, and although she'll never meet our future children, I feel strongly that I want our children to have some connection to her. Using one of her names helps me accomplish that, I think.

It just turns out that her MN and my father's FN (both names that we'll probably use for future children) are names I like that are becoming somewhat hip now (June, Everett).

fraglette · February 2011

1) Any person I want to honor didn't have that great a name (my mom is the exception) This is why I stick with middle names. Both my brother and my middle names are after our paternal grandparents. They're both awful names, but coming in the middle, they're not used and they work okay. Our boy middle name is something I would never use as a first name, but it's really important for me to honor the family member, so we're using it in the middle.

2) Any person that had a good name was a bit of an jerk in real life Yeah, this would be out for me, but is kind of taken care of by #1. Bad names are okay, bad people are not.

3) I'm not comfortable naming using a name from the family tree if I've never met them just in case they were jerks. I don't get this - wouldn't someone in your family know? I LOVE the name Alice. I didn't even realize it was the name of someone in my family. I mentioned it to my Aunt once (a friend named her daughter that) and she spent the evening telling me about her "crazy Aunt Alice" who hired prostitutes to have her babies and carried around pictures of other people's children claiming them to be hers. Alice was obviously stricken from our list.

4) There are no non-family members I want to honor with a name. This isn't really an issue for me either, but family is pretty important to me, moreso than friends.

And for the record, can I jump on the "I love Edith" bandwagon?

kxp004 · February 2011

I really am not fond off honorific names... We a) didn't want to show bias towards one family or the other and b) felt that our child should have his own name to grow into

My DH's biological father was named Michael...so his first born son was named Michael, then the 3rd son had the middle name Michael, and now the first born Michael has a son named Michael... talk about confusing

I think it is nice to honor family members this way if you choose to, but my DH and I definately won't be...

Yas18 · February 2011

KateB1984:
I don't understand using family names from distant family members you have no emotional relationship with. By all means use the name if you love it, but don't say it's a family name as if that's why you used it. Using your family tree as a baby name book doesn't increase the significance of a name for me.
I don't have a huge desire to honour living family members. I could do it, but I don't feel a desire to. My kids will have a relationship with those people, and I think that honours them just fine. Maybe if I loved a name of a living family member, I'd use it, but there aren't any I love, or even really like.
If we have a girl, her mn will be Heather. It was my grandmother's mn, and she died when I was 16. I wish she could meet my children, and I want to remember her in this little way. In addition, her father (my great grandfather, who I was very close to before he died when I was 7) named her Heather in tribute to Scotland, where he was born, so it's all the more special to me because it makes me think of him too. I don't love the name Heather, but I love the meaning. That said, had he named her Bonnie, which could also be a nod to Scotland, I wouldn't have used it because I hate the name and it would sound terrible with our ln. So to me, no family name is completely use-no-matter-what.

This.

See, I personally love the idea of honouring someone I'm close to, but I'd only do it for someone I actually know & love.

My mum's name is Andrea and my twin sister's name is Danielle.

If I do ever have a daughter, I would name her Alexandria {After my mum and my friend Maria-Alexandra}, or Emmeline {Which in a way would be after my best friend MELissa, best friend DaniEL and my sister}.

I know this may seem stupid to some people, but I like the idea of honouring them using a name I like, rather than just their name! I love my mum's name, but so far have found nothing I like with it as a first name. And I love Alexandria to bits. So for me, this is a sort of way to honour her, for being there for me ALWAYS.

I was very close to my paternal grandmother before she died. Her name was Mary and I would love to use her name as a middle name. My other grandmother's name is Hannah and I'm close to her also.. but flow and sound and everything else is very important to me. So I guess we'll see.

For boys, I'd use both my brothers and step-father's middle names.

The only problem I'd find is who to use first! (; Since the others might never be used.

Sorry if that made no sense and I just babbled.

I basically just explained my family tree.. -blush-

But my point is, I think it matters if you like the name.

I agree with all of your points.

I'd name my child after best friends or people whove impacted my life.

I'd rather not name my child after Great Aunt Rebecca, just because I may like the name.

Keri Marie · February 2011

I love Edith!

I gave my DD the MN Ren? and it's my family's last name. My grandfather, Donald Ren? just died and I am so proud that there is a name connection between the two.

I've always wanted to honor my Grandmother, Delores Shirley. As a kid I thought her name was "old" but I've grown to love Delores. Now I think it sounds grownup and sexy. DH vetoed.

I chose names off of our family tree even if I haven't met the person. Their names can serve as "inspirations" to me. I think you can name your kid AFTER some one or have their name be INSPIRED BY some one.

sunnydaisy · February 2011

I think it's a nice gesture when people use names to honor someone, but I don't have a strong desire to do so myself. Meaning, sound, flow are more important to me, and I want to use something I like. I agree with all the reasons OP mentioned and what another pp said about not wanting to slight opposite sides of the family. I found out the hard way that dh's side will take offense. A couple of them actually told me I couldn't use any names from my own side of the family because my children would carry dh's last name, not my maiden name.

elyshaswedding · February 2011

I'm pretty much on the same page, braveangel. My husband loves the name Charlotte (and I think it's pretty, too), but it's my great-aunt's name (she's still living). She is by no means a horrible person, but she is kind of a grouch, so I wouldn't want to use her name because of the association.

There are some great names in my family tree, and I would consider them without thinking about who they were as a person, just not in honor of them, if that makes sense.

ETA: Our children's mns are all in honor of a family member/close friend. Avery is the last name of DH's close family friend, Kimball was his late grandfather's mn, and the new baby will have two mns, from my family.

EastCoastBride · February 2011

Haven't read the responses. Here's my take - if you WANT to honor someone, great. But you don't HAVE to and if there isn't a name you like, then don't honor anyone.

starlight8323 · February 2011

braveangel2:
My mom is really the only one I'd want to honor, and I like her first name, but she doesn't care one way or another, and I feel I honor her more by being a loving family member and passing on her values.

I've thought about the subject a lot lately, and I think I have come up with a unique perspective on family names.

They are great and all, but they're just not for me. I'd rather give my children "their own" names, just as I'm thankful to have "my own" [first] name.

I plan to make it clear to all descendants that I prefer to keep my first name as my own. If they want to honor me, or keep my memory alive, I'd rather them do so by telling stories about me or passing down my scrapbooks and family trees.

I especially don't see the point of naming a child after someone they'll never meet. And especially if it is someone who died just before the baby was born. For example, if my grandmother died right before my daughter was born, and I name her after that grandmother. It's really more of a coincedence that the baby got that name, rather than the grandmother who happened to die 10 years ago, who perhaps I liked better.

If I used a familiy name at all, it would be after a person that I felt might have a great influence on my baby's life. For example, my father has had a great influence on my life, and it's not unrealistic to think he could live another 30 years. So there's a great chance my son will feel a great connection to him as well.

So if I used a family name at all from my side, he would be the one I would want to honor. But I would definitely ask him ahead of time if it's okay for me to use "his name", since he already has to share both his first and middle names with both of his grandfathers. Wink

HAFranklin · February 2011

I love the idea of naming your DC after someone you love/admire, but I have run into the same types of problems. For instance, DH was very close to his uncle that passed when he was a teen. He really wanted to use his name as DS's mn. The problem (besides not being a huge fan of the name) is that I also have an uncle with this name, and he is a huge douchebag jerk. Just a seriously unpleasant person to be around. I didn't want to use it and have my family assume it was in honor of MY uncle. Side note: DS still ended up with an honorific mn. It's DH's mn, and my grandfather's name.

If there is anyone I would want to name my future hypothetical DD after it would be my grandmother. The problem? Her name is hideous. Totally made up and terrible. It's Murble. As much as I love my grandma, I could never name my child Murble (and Grandma would come probably come back to haunt me if I did so because she HATED her name). We might use her mn, Geneva, or a variant, though.

sadie890 · February 2011

I am not huge into honorific names my self; I would rather give my children names that I love, or that will give them their own identity. Plus, there are so many people in my family I am close to and love, that I wouldn't be able to honor everyone I might like to. However, there are circumstances where I would use a family name, or use a name for inspiration.

For example;

I have been extremely close to my cousin, Bethany (but who has always gone by Beth) since she was born, and if I decided to honor her, I would probably not use the name "Bethany" even though I love it, because to me it is her name. Instead, I would probably use Elizabeth as a mn, so my child would have "their own name" but it would still have "beth" in it.

As for honoring people you have never met/ people who have died, in my circumstance, the only person I really want to honor fits into both categories, haha. When I was born, my mom picked my name (Sadie) without knowing it was my dad's Grandmother's name (she had died when my dad's mother was only 2 or 3, so my dad was not familiar with her). It was a coincidence, but it has always made me very curious about my great grandmother, and has sparked an interest in me to learn about her and my family history in General. My mother's father passed away before I was born; my mom was only 16 or 17 when it happened. He is the only grandfather I have never met, and just because I did not know him doesn't mean he should have less of a connection with my children. I still have all of my other grandparents, so they will either meet my children, or my children will hear stories about them from me. Perhaps having my grandfather's name will spark an interest in them like it did to me. As an added bonus, I love his name; Edmund. So I would have no problem using it, haha.

(sorry for babbling a bit, just thought I would share)

grace782 · February 2011

I love my maternal grandmother's name (Jacqueline), but I'd never use it, because I wouldn't want to seem like I was honoring her, for reasons much like your #2. And I definitely agree with your #1! A lot of either boring names (Jon) or names DH and I just don't like (Maxine).

FirstBabyMomma · February 2011

I think you really have to love the person and the name both to use it as a first name, but just have to love the person to use it as a middle name, YKWIM? For instance, our daughter's middle name is Kathryn (my mother's middle name, and the name of my sister who died in infancy). I wanted to use the name, but didn't love it enough to use it as a first name.

If DD had been a boy, we would have used Adam Justin Robert (and called him A.J.) All three of those names are honorific- my mom's dad, my dad's dad, and DH's dad's dad. We love all three men and all three names! We hate to leave out DH's maternal grandfather but DH never met him, and we don't love his name (Harold)

Want a personalized experience?

How do you feel about honorific names?

Re: How do you feel about honorific names?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards