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Attachment Parenting
Thanks for letting DD CIO MIL
I asked MIL if she would listen for DD and go in if she woke up while I took a shower tonight. When I stopped running the water, I could hear DD hysterically crying. I ran into the room and she was near throwing up. I picked her up and nursed her and finally got her back to sleep. When I went downstairs, MIL had turned the monitor down. I couldn't believe it. She has been trying to force CIO on me for weeks now since we have been visiting her. I keep telling her I won't do it. She told me tonight she thought it might be easier on me if she did it cause I couldn't. I get that she thinks she is being helpful, but I am fuming right now. On top of this, this morning she wanted grandma time and so she watched DD while I did some other things and then told me after how she had to give her a serious time out cause she wasn't listening. Um, she is one. I can't wait to leave.
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Re: Thanks for letting DD CIO MIL
Who gives a one year old a timeout???????
Want me to come kidnap you lol?
I know! I just booked my flight today so Im counting down now.
THIS!
And CIO, even per Ferber and Weissblum, does not entail random 'oh let's just let a baby cry until she falls asleep if she wakes up on some Thursday night'. That just teaches the baby that sometimes, for no apparent reason, grandma won't come pick me up. I am not trying to defend CIO because I don't believe in the full on version, but even that has a structure to it. Sorry your DD had to endure this.
That would drive me crazy.
And you know I don't think she does think she's being helpful. She thinks she's right, and she thinks that if only she has a chance to show you how CIO is super successful then she'll be right, you'll be wrong and you'll be greatful for being shown the error of your ways.
Maybe if you'd said, "I would like to do CIO but I just can't listen to LO cry." then I would buy she was being helpful.
But really she is being pushy and sneaky. You're a better DIL than I am. I would have gone nuts at her.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
My pedi suggested this at our 1-year visit, actually. We nodded and smiled and ignored it along with all his other "parenting" advice.
I'm sorry you're stuck in this position, though. I hate when family members think they know how to raise your kid better than you do.
Ugh, totally this. And I would make it a point to tell her so. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of that. Hopefully the remainder of your stay goes quick.
This!
The Jackson Journey
Ughh...so sorry she did this!
That would definetly be the last time I'd let her watch LO. Hope you get to leave soon.
This.
Your husband needs to have a nice, long chat with his mother. NOT YOU, him. He needs to make it clear that he will not allow his mother to disrespect HIM, or his wife, or his daughter that way. Period.
this exactly. ugh. I'm sorry
This! She is trying to undermine you as LO's mother. She doesn't have to agree with your parenting style, but she has to at least honor it when you are trusting her to watch your child. Personally that would be the last time I let her watch my child. My IL's will never watch LO because of reasons just like this, they cannot be trusted.
not ok.
i will make concession with grandparents on a few things, but CIO (to the point of screaming like that, anyway) is not one of them.
Wow.
I think I'd have a "nice" talk with my mom if she did that and have my wife have a "nice" talk with her mom if she was the one who did that.
www.hangingwithdad.com
This! I can see MIL doing something like this because she "knows better." But she would not be left in charge of LO again.
BFP #1 9/7/10, EDD 5/14/11, Violet born 5/27/11.
BFP #2 4/9/12, EDD 12/16/12, M/C Rory 4/24/12.
BFP #3 10/6/12, EDD 6/16/12., Matilda born 6/17/13.
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