Another daycare question: WWYD?

L L CG · February 2011

Whet I dropped A off this morning (aside: she was in the best mood evah and has started reaching out for toys and laughing so I had a great morning) one of the teachers gave me a note card with the names of the two teachers on it and asked that I write down and comments or feedback that I have.

I am hesitant to do this. I actually have grown to love the teacher who handed me the card. The other teacher is very young (21), and that might explain why she is shy, but she never greets me when I come into the room, even if she's holding DD. I've also seen her on two separate occasions stand around and talk to the other teacher while there is a crying baby in a crib. It took all I had not to tell her that she can gossip while holding the crying baby just as easily as she can while leaning against the desk.

Anywho, my question is this: would you be honest in your comments? My concerns about this teacher aren't to the level where I've felt compelled to talk to the director about it. Do I write down my thoughts about the bad teacher or just omit them and write good things about the good teacher? WWYD?

Nessia · February 2011

I would write the comments. The young teacher can't correct the behavior if it's not pointed out. I would be snarky about it but kindly note that she needs to pay attention to c eying babies and be more social with parents.

rssnlvr · February 2011

I know you can put your fancy degrees to good use and find a way to say that the bad teacher doesn't do her job as well as you would have expected while still being polite and fair.

Nikison · February 2011

I would be honest.

Jess.O · February 2011

Ditto both pp. They're asking so they want to know.

ali-1411 · February 2011

I think you can give some constructive criticism. Be honest, polite and fair.

ndluvsrk · February 2011

L*L*CG:

Anywho, my question is this: would you be honest in your comments? My concerns about this teacher aren't to the level where I've felt compelled to talk to the director about it. Do I write down my thoughts about the bad teacher or just omit them and write good things about the good teacher? WWYD?

Yes. I would hope that the feedback is anonymous, but even if not, the young teacher needs to know how she's coming across and that parents are noticing that she's not being attentive to these young babies (which I'm sure creates some anxiety and even lack of trust in the parents of these young sweet babies, like yourself, right?).

That gives the director or whoever the chance to address the behaviour and if she still doesn't improve, it is easier for them to let her go since it is documented.

Even if you haven't felt compelled to talk to the director about her yet, would you want her to be the sole one responsible for your DD if the lead teacher was out sick or some other scenario (if the ratios would allow)?

roman43010 · February 2011

I agree with all other posts. The teacher can't correct it unless it is brought to her attention. I tried to come up with a polite way to say it but I'm drawing a blank.

L L CG · February 2011

Ok, so, I was honest but sandwiched the bad comment in between two good comments:

"Ms. G is very nice and caring. I can tell that she enjoys the babies. I do wish she was more attentive to the babies in general. On a couple of occasions I have seen her standing around while a baby is crying in their crib. This makes me uncomfortable. Ms. G is always polite when I talk to her."

What it comes down to is this: there just isn't a nice way to tell someone that they are f'ing it up.

Abrooks · February 2011

Just be honest. Honesty doesn't have to be mean. But if she's not doing her job and you have concerns, you need to communicate that. And if you don't feel comfortable talking to the director or the teacher about her lack of attention to the baby, then I would talk the lead teacher at least. Her job is to take care of the babies and she was ignoring them to gossip. Not ok in my book.

mlf625 · February 2011

L*L*CG:
Ok, so, I was honest but sandwiched the bad comment in between two good comments:
"Ms. G is very nice and caring. I can tell that she enjoys the babies. I do wish she was more attentive to the babies in general. On a couple of occasions I have seen her standing around while a baby is crying in their crib. This makes me uncomfortable. Ms. G is always polite when I talk to her."

I think that's great, even a bit nicer than I would've been about it. We had an issue like this at the gym daycare. A younger girl who works the after-school shift would just stand there and not greet the kids when we entered (even if my kids were the only kids in the room), and it made me AND A very uneasy. I went straight to the coordinator's office and let her know I expected a "hello, kids!" at very least. The coordinator thanked me about 10x for coming to talk to her, because she said most people are afraid to offend and that makes it tough for her to know how to improve the care.

And FWIW, Miss MuteyMcMutePants is very chatty now when I come in.

L L CG · February 2011

Well, F. I just went over there and another parent came in to drop off her comment card. The teachers read it out loud and it was all puppies sh!tting rainbows.

So I chickened out and didn't give them my card and stole a blank one.

I find it ironic that I spent 3 years being trained to be a professional advocate but I cannot handle giving constructive criticism to my kid's daycare teacher.

AlieSlavin · February 2011

First - puppies sh!tting on rainbows - ROFLMAO.

How about you ask the teacher you handed the card to if you can please give your feedback in person and in private. I've always found that it's easier to say to a person and in private. Then she'll be able to tell that you are hesitant but want to give constructive feedback.

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Another daycare question: WWYD?

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