what keeps your 3.5-4 year old's attention?

MelissaMc22 · February 2011

LOSING MY MIND!

Jack will not play with any toys. None.

He just whirls around me with his sword, builds forts, rolls around on my exercise ball and just makes a big ole mess.

Nothing keeps his attention, not pirate ships, games, puzzles, play doh. Nothing. He just has to move.

He says, "He can't" play when asked.

what else can I do? I love him to death, but he's like a bee buzzing in your ear after so long.

JLPT830 · February 2011

Oh Melissa....I'm sorry! Caleb was like that for a long time and it is really really hard. Is he able to do independent tasks in school? If so, maybe you can talk to his teacher and see if you can replicate something at home like at school. Maybe it's time for a sticker chart. Set the timer for x number of minutes and tell him he has to go to ______ room and do an activity on his own until the timer rings. If he can do that then he gets a sticker. X number of stickers and he gets a reward. Then maybe you can keep up-ing the time by a few minutes.

allobosc · February 2011

probably not the answer you want but Sponge Bob always provides me with at least thirty minutes of peace.

curlypie1 · February 2011

Barbies! Although that probably doesn't help you out.

She also will sit for a long time and play computer games. She received a Webkinz Jr. for Christmas so she goes online to take care of her pet.

She also LOVES cutting things so we leave her art box out with her safety scissors and she goes to town shredding different pieces of paper, junk mail, etc...

DH built a "tent" over her bead with a blanket yesterday and she sat under it with her princess figures for an hour or so.

Those are the very few things she will do on her own. The rest of her toys, she doesn't find enjoyment in playing with solo it seems.

Ttimes3 · February 2011

JLPT830:
Oh Melissa....I'm sorry! Caleb was like that for a long time and it is really really hard. Is he able to do independent tasks in school? If so, maybe you can talk to his teacher and see if you can replicate something at home like at school. Maybe it's time for a sticker chart. Set the timer for x number of minutes and tell him he has to go to ______ room and do an activity on his own until the timer rings. If he can do that then he gets a sticker. X number of stickers and he gets a reward. Then maybe you can keep up-ing the time by a few minutes.

I like this idea.

Also, would it be possible to increase the number of days he attends preschool?

escape1st · February 2011

Ditto the sticker chart. I use a kitchen timer and set it for "x" amount of minutes. When the timer dings then he gets a sticker. I started out small (5 or 10 minutes) and have built up to 30 minutes. We started this right before Christmas and it is going well so far.

There are a couple shows that I know also know he'll sit and watch...Word World, Dinosaur Train, and Imagination Movers. I'll turn one of those on when I need to get something done, too.

MelissaMc22 · February 2011

Thanks girls. We have been dealing with this for a while.

I may try the sticker chart!

Thanks again.

sistrkate · February 2011

Nothing keeps Justin's attention for more than 3-4 minutes, and I am not kidding. The absolute only thing he will sit still to do is watch television and I'm about to throw the blasted thing in the trash, because I'm tired of fighting over it.

I feel your pain. I hope this is normal behavior, because he's making me nuts.

MelissaMc22 · February 2011

Jack loves TV too. He watches 1-2 shows in the AM. A movie during S's naptime, and sometimes a show in the evening.

That's three hours a day, at least! Granted, I am with him for 11. But sill, too much TV bugs me.

He'd watch it the entire 11 hours if I let him.

MrsMoher · February 2011

Cartoons occasionally, food rarely... that's about it. OH and let's not forget Jack... your son is apparently very good at keeping Eli's attention!

MrsMoher · February 2011

Have you by any chance given him chores to do? Hear me out, because I know it sounds crazy, but the more Eli gets to help me clean up, cook, set the table, etc. the happier and more likely he is to give me a few minutes of me time afterwards and the less buzzing bee he is too (I totally know what you mean!).

We bought plastic plates at Walmart for him to set the table and he knows to ask if we need forks or spoons or both and then he counts them (so he kinda learns too). He'll pull over the kitchen chair to the counter and help me with non dangerous cooking tasks. Like mixing, he will hold a bowl (I also hold it) and I can mix it. He will go get me a spoon or spatula or whatever while cooking. He carries over boxes for me or helps pick a flavor. He's a god send while vaccuuming, because he will move little stuff out of the way. Cleaning his room or other rooms that his toys have migrated to. I don't think you have pets, but he will fill the cat and dog food bowls for me and pick the flavor of the wet food they get each day. He will fetch stuff for H (like a 2 liter or refill his water... plastic cups) since he can't do it himself. Pours the laundry detergent or puts in the little gel pack for the dishwasher and pushes buttons to start those machines.

Not really a way to get him to go about his business, but if you can get him incorporated into what you do, at least for me, it is easier. Plus it's nice to have help with that stuff (sometimes). And seriously HE LOVES being able to help, like a big boy. Plus if he is a super big help and doesn't cry or drive me insane or talk back or whatever bad stuff he does that week, he gets a "surprise" (yes I bribe him) and we have a bag of those little $1 matchbox cars, gummies, stickers, etc. that he can pick something out of. He eats that up and then it gives him enough mommy or daddy time that he will play alone for a little.

gimbal · February 2011

Melissa and Katie, I can relate. Anytime I say that she needs to play by herself and suggest a certain toy or activity, she says, "But I need help." I even bought a book of Montessori at-home activities hoping it would help teach her some independence. Maybe I used the book wrong, but she only wanted to do the activities with me right there watching her.

I wish I were lying when I say that DS can entertain himself 10x longer than she can. A couple months ago DH and I were saying, "So, this is what it's like to have a child who actually plays with toys!" I have no advice, but I can relate. I'm hoping the playset in the dining room will help, but I'm not really holding out much hope.

She supposedly does fine entertaining herself at preschool. Good for the teachers, frustrating for me. And then I feel guilty for feeling that way.

kel716 · February 2011

Have you introduced the computer to him yet? Seriously.

I know B is not yet Jack's age, but I also know that DH and I can usually get a small task done when B plays on the computer. We use fisher price's website, pbskids, and our speech therapist recently suggested starfall.com

Anyway, the games on there are free and there's tons of them. B chooses what he wants to play and loves it. He's even gotten to the point where if he wants games on fisher price, when he opens Internet Explorer he types "F I S" and that pulls up fisher price because it's cached. He also types "P B S" for pbs and pulls it up and goes where he wants to go. It's amazing that he can do that by himself, but he truly does love it. We let him play in approximately 20 minute intervals... that's about his limit before he gets into mischief.

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