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October 2011 Moms
MrsMeMo
member
XP: We're Out (Long & Graphic)
MrsMeMo
member
We confirmed the miscarriage yesterday afternoon. We lost the baby at 6w5d.
The appointment was painful, horrifying, and hilarious.
The painful part was both physical and emotional. J was standing beside me holding my right hand while everything went down. The Dr. saw what he called the "tissue" at the opening of my cervix when he checked me out. He told me he was going to "scrape" out what he could to try to avoid a D&C. This was the most painful process. I think within 5 seconds I was crying, screaming, and hyperventilating. The nurse was trying to talk me through breathing- much like labor I guess. I pray no one in the waiting room heard me, because if so, they must have been terrified. I begged the Dr. through cries to please stop. He told me he would stop if I really needed him to, because it wasn't necessary for him to finish.
Here comes the horrifying (and then hilarious) part. Right as the Dr. starts to take a break J "leans" over on top of my stomach. He was kind of shaking a little bit so I was thinking that he was crying and just breaking down a little. I asked if he was okay through my own sobs, but he didn't answer. I tried to nudge him with my right arm, and right as I realized he wasn't responding the door slammed open and two nurses ran in to help the Dr. and attending nurse pull him up off of me. When I saw him coming up and I saw his eyes they were huge and he looked so confused. I was terrified he was having a seizure or something and he'd be paralyzed or brain dead.. I was writhing around on the table butt naked asking if my husband was okay while the nurses were trying to hold me back down and tell me he was okay. That's right ladies - my husband fainted. Apparentally the sound of me screaming like that paired with him being on his feet, and already being in a "weakened emotional state" caused him to faint. Once he was okay, and the Dr. explained he wasn't paralyzed for life from a seizure I actually laughed. He kept saying "Oh my God, i'm so embarrassed!". He's such a big tough guy, and it just kind of helped me in my moment of weakness to know that not only was he not taking this so well, but that my pain was hard on him. We laughed about it a lot last night & I even re-enacted it for him.
The Dr. was able to painlessly remove the "tissue" during the manual internal, and sent it off to be tested for blood type (since i'm O-) and see if there was any rhyme or reason behind the miscarriage. I did still have to get the rhogam shot (in my arm) and the shot, nor the after effects hurt at all.
I have been instructed to have one more full period, and then once the second period comes we can try again. We are both sad, but better than expected. I think I cried everything I had in the office yesterday.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and to support, think about, and pray for us over the past week.
I am still so happy for each and every one of you, and if it's okay i'd love to check back from time to time to see how things are going, see who's having boys or girls, and then look at all the gorgeous babies in Sept/Oct/Nov! :-)
This discussion has been closed.
Re: XP: We're Out (Long & Graphic)
I am so sorry. It sounds like an awful night, too. I'm not sure why your doctor wouldn't just do the d&c later if you were in so much pain?? It sounds like a difficult situation was made much worse. I'm glad you could find some humor in your night though
The mc/pl board was really helpful and supportive when I had my loss, and you might want to visit over there when you're ready. Sending you hugs, thoughts and prayers.
I'm so sorry
(
Oscar born October 2011
Miscarriage at 8 weeks (August 2013)
DD due September 1, 2014
My Blog
I'm so sorry for your loss. (((Big Hugs))) No one should have to go through this.
October 2011 - DS (7)
July 2014 - Stillborn DD (24 weeks)
August 2015 - DD (3)
April 2018 - 5 week loss
I'm so sorry. What a terrible experience. If you learned anything though, keep your husband out of the labor and delivery room when the time comes.
Best wishes to you on getting your future sticky baby.
TTC #2 since 4/09
Unexplained Secondary IF
*****************************
4 failed rounds of clomid ~ 4 failed IUIs ~ 1 m/c
2/3/11: IUI #5 - Femara/Follistim/Ovidrel/Crinone = BFP (2/14)!!!
Beta #1 (12dpiui): 53 Beta #2 (14dpiui): 203 Beta #3 (20dpiui): 3932 Beta #4 (28dpiui): 60,775
1st U/S (3/3): 2 sacs & yolks 2nd U/S (3/8) 2 heartbeats-TWINS!
Baby A:6w6d HR 131 Baby B:6w4d HR 124
TWINS!! EDD 10/25/2011
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I wouldn't have ever said anything before, but based on your posts I kinda figured you were experiencing a loss. There really are no words that can help.....but I'm still very sorry for you!!! Even more so, I can only IMAGINE how much it hurt to have the doc to what he did (without any meds I'm assuming). I remember how painful it was when my MW would check my cervix as I was getting close to having DS. Yikes!!
Glad to hear that you are doing better than you thought. Take it one day at a time, some days will be better than others, and there will be things that catch you off guard and send you into tears. But God knows His plan for you, have faith in that! Of course we'd love to have you check in from time to time if it's not too hard on you!
HUGS!
BFP Chart
OCT 2011 Moms BlogI'm sorry I missed this post earlier today and I'm even more sorry for your loss. I'm kind of mad your doctor had you in so much pain. If the tissue was at the opening of your cervix, your body was doing its job to get it out already. Having you be in any extra pain was just unnecessary. I guess on the plus side, there was some tissue retrieved for testing...but still.
Good little nugget of info for you to tuck away for future reference about your husband. I swear its always the tough guys that go down like that.
I certainly don't mind if you check in on us from time to time. I did so too with the July board after my own loss. Its hard at times though, so if you need to step away thats understandable too.
I wish you all the best with your recovery and I wish you all the best for a take-home baby in your future. ((hugs))
BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11
BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) DD born 4.23.14
My Recipe Blog
~All AL'ers welcome~
Thank you all for your support and kind words. My husband and I both appreciated reading through them. You all rock, and I'll absolutely be checking in. I thought I'd be angry at the pregnant women and moms around me, but I actually feel MORE supportive of others ... hmmm.
Just wanted to clarify about the exam incase anyone misunderstood or has to go through this and is scared - - I didn't have a D&C. The Dr. was just checking to see if he saw any evidence besides bleeding, and the "tissue" was right at the beginning of my cervix. He told me before he started scraping he was going to try and see if he could just scrape it away to make the process go faster. He only scraped for about 5-10 seconds and as soon as I asked him to stop he did. He said it wasn't necessary to continue, he just wanted to do what he could to make it quicker and easier for me. Thankfully it worked because as soon as he started the manual exam the "tissue" came right out on his fingers. I wish I hadn't had to see that, but it almost gave me comfort knowing I REALLY wasn't pregnant anymore. Hopefully that clears it up for some of you who were concerned I was having minor surgery right in the office with no meds.