s/o second kids...

racampbell1 · February 2011

Aside from costs of childcare, which is addressed in a post below, please share with me your biggest challenge as a working mom when going from one kid to two. TIA!

madhatter2003 · February 2011

Getting 2 kids out of the car and into daycare on a snowy/icy morning.

Honestly, the money was the worst of it. Once you have one kid, adding a 2nd really wasn't as bad of a shock as going from 0-1 kid. You already have the child care under control, you have the mental divide of working/spouse/mother/time for yourself going.

It is harder to get time for ME. Someone always needs something it seems, but I will say DH steps up even more than when we had 1 if you KWIM. And I'm more 'selfish' now with my time because I need it to stay sane. With 1 I could go go go, but with 2 I do burn out a bit easier.

It is also harder to juggle illnesses as they never get sick at the same time, it's usually one the 1st week and the other the next week sort of thing.

vagirl06 · February 2011

Considering I haven't worked a full week since before Christmas, as PP said...the kids never get sick at the same time. So with 2 kids, you miss twice as much work for illness.

You always have a kid. With one, your husband can take the kid and you are kid free. With two, both parents essentially have a kid at all times. I struggled with that at first. I felt like I didn't talk to or really see my husband for the first 3 months.

Things such as running to Target or to the grocery store now take much longer with 2 kids. DD #1 was 2.5 when DD #2 was born. I could take her with me wherever I went and she was fine. Now, trying to get a 3 year old and a 9 month old in the car, out of the car at the store, in the shopping cart and keep both happy while shopping is quite an experience!

Weekend naps - I used to nap with DD#1 every Saturday and Sunday. I loved it and it gave my husband time to do his own thing. Now, even when DD #1 takes a nap there is still DD #2 to entertain. Either I miss out on a nap because I have her or DH misses out on his free time because he has her.

After having your second child, you look back at all the "free" time you had when you just had one!

LyndaCarter · February 2011

The crazy, hectic crap on weeknights. Getting home at 5:45/6:00 getting dinner started, keeping DD#1 occupied, calming down DD#2, putting DD#2 to bed (she's down by 6:30), getting DD#1 on the potty, doing the pumped milk redistribution into bottles for daycare the next day, eating dinner, cleaning up dinner, cleaning bottles from that day, getting DD#2 to bed and so on. It's like a juggling act for 2 hours every night and I hate it.

trinny · February 2011

For me, it was hard to go back to having a newborn again. I get my toddler to bed, and then I have a newborn to get to sleep, bottles to clean/prepare for the next day, etc.

But my DH is great-- he has really stepped up, so i can't say things are much, much harder than they were before, just different, less downtime/breaks, more cleaning and laundry.

For now, I miss my DD some because I can't give her as much attention, but she doesn't seem to notice at all, since her dad does so much. But that'll change as DS grows up and DH can do more for him too-- we are man on man rigth now, and it is usually me with the baby, since I'm nursing.

trinny · February 2011

mainerocks:
vagirl06:
After having your second child, you look back at all the "free" time you had when you just had one!
Oh God, this is a scary thought! )

LOL-- yeah, I was just telling someone this yesterday. So true-- one kid seems so easy now! I guess I'm glad DS was a surprise or we'd never have had a second!

LJR 84 · February 2011

mainerocks:
vagirl06:
Considering I haven't worked a full week since before Christmas, as PP said...the kids never get sick at the same time. So with 2 kids, you miss twice as much work for illness.
You always have a kid. With one, your husband can take the kid and you are kid free. With two, both parents essentially have a kid at all times. I struggled with that at first. I felt like I didn't talk to or really see my husband for the first 3 months.
Things such as running to Target or to the grocery store now take much longer with 2 kids. DD #1 was 2.5 when DD #2 was born. I could take her with me wherever I went and she was fine. Now, trying to get a 3 year old and a 9 month old in the car, out of the car at the store, in the shopping cart and keep both happy while shopping is quite an experience!
Weekend naps - I used to nap with DD#1 every Saturday and Sunday. I loved it and it gave my husband time to do his own thing. Now, even when DD #1 takes a nap there is still DD #2 to entertain. Either I miss out on a nap because I have her or DH misses out on his free time because he has her.
After having your second child, you look back at all the "free" time you had when you just had one!
Oh God, this is a scary thought! )

I was thinking the same exact thing! It makes me just a little nervous.

LJR 84 · February 2011

mainerocks:
vagirl06:
Considering I haven't worked a full week since before Christmas, as PP said...the kids never get sick at the same time. So with 2 kids, you miss twice as much work for illness.
You always have a kid. With one, your husband can take the kid and you are kid free. With two, both parents essentially have a kid at all times. I struggled with that at first. I felt like I didn't talk to or really see my husband for the first 3 months.
Things such as running to Target or to the grocery store now take much longer with 2 kids. DD #1 was 2.5 when DD #2 was born. I could take her with me wherever I went and she was fine. Now, trying to get a 3 year old and a 9 month old in the car, out of the car at the store, in the shopping cart and keep both happy while shopping is quite an experience!
Weekend naps - I used to nap with DD#1 every Saturday and Sunday. I loved it and it gave my husband time to do his own thing. Now, even when DD #1 takes a nap there is still DD #2 to entertain. Either I miss out on a nap because I have her or DH misses out on his free time because he has her.
After having your second child, you look back at all the "free" time you had when you just had one!
Oh God, this is a scary thought! )

I was thinking the same exact thing! It makes me just a little nervous.

AutumnBride929 · February 2011

trinny:
mainerocks:
vagirl06:

After having your second child, you look back at all the "free" time you had when you just had one!

Oh God, this is a scary thought! )

LOL-- yeah, I was just telling someone this yesterday. So true-- one kid seems so easy now! I guess I'm glad DS was a surprise or we'd never have had a second!

OMG, girl, you are terrifying me! LOL

madhatter2003 · February 2011

I'll agree (not to extend the scary) but I'll take one kid ANYWHERE now. It's so easy to get out with just one, either one. It's taking 2 toddlers places that makes me sweat sometimes.

NEVER EVER EVER EVER take 2 toddler shoe shopping on your own. You may think one trip to stride rite vs 2 will save time, but you will DEEPLY REGRET IT!! Stick out tongue

trinny · February 2011

madhatter2003:
I'll agree (not to extend the scary) but I'll take one kid ANYWHERE now. It's so easy to get out with just one, either one. It's taking 2 toddlers places that makes me sweat sometimes.
NEVER EVER EVER EVER take 2 toddler shoe shopping on your own. You may think one trip to stride rite vs 2 will save time, but you will DEEPLY REGRET IT!!

I can so relate! I will buy 10 pairs of shoes, try them all at home, and return 9 to avoid this!

wendy25 · February 2011

OMG! Where was this post a couple of months ago when I thought it would be a great idea to have 2 kids?!?! Baby fever should be considered a serious medical condition.

:runs away really really scared:

FortMyersBride · February 2011

Ditto, this post is freaking me out, especially since DH will be on-call constantly next year. What was I thinking?

JandB07 · February 2011

I would agree for us right now it's the constant illness and missing work. Thankfully I have a very understanding boss with young children herself because DH can't take off work like I can so I have missed a ton of work this winter. For the people who are getting nervous, it is more difficult with 2 but just like everything else it just becomes your new normal. And trust me even on the worst days it makes it all worth it when I see how much my girls adore each other.

Pesky · February 2011

* the illnesses -- one will pass to the other and so on.

* getting 2 out the door alone when DS was very young. With young babies, there is always the element of surprise -- like surprise blowouts or spitup requiring a new outfit, or suddenly needing to be fed right away, etc. Tougher with a toddler to entertain

* money -- it's amazing how that gets siphoned off with two

* the sheer amount of stuff you end up with between the toys for the older and the stuff for the younger. Plus is you get much less attached to that stuff and more likely to dump it quickly once it is outgrown.

mrstarawalsh · February 2011

Getting enough sleep. At first when one kid woke up I'd get her down then the other one would get up and it would go on all night long.

Want a personalized experience?

s/o second kids...

Re: s/o second kids...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards