Attachment Parenting

Co-sleeping = no napping at daycare?

I swear I was having a good day earlier but now I'm just not.

DS co-sleeps and I'm totally fine with that. He's getting a little more mobile and I am thinking about either side-carring the crib or getting him into a pack n play in our room soon. But this is all besides the point. The kid won't nap at daycare! I have no problem putting him down to sleep at home, but the daycare lady said he probably only slept 30 minutes total today. She also told me she let him cry for 20 minutes, which pisses me off. She said he was only fussing when I said we don't let him cry, but still. So since none of that work (surprise, he didn't fall asleep after 20 minutes of "fussing"), he didn't sleep.

Some days I question if the fact that I work out of the home makes it so that I can't raise my child the way I want him to be raised. Twice this week he's had people try and let him cry it out (grandma and daycare). They won't try again, but in some ways I feel like there are probably a whole bunch of things that they'll do that I wouldn't do. How do I come to terms with that?

I'm also worried about his health. He needs to sleep to grow...

I'm not really into sleep training and the whole idea of it, but maybe I need to do something to get him to nap in a pack n play (he naps in our bed)?

I don't know if I'm going anywhere with this. If anyone has any similar stories or just wants to tell me that it will get better because everything is a phase, I'd appreciate that. I'm just feeling down today.

DX PCOS, Endometriosis 2009
Eliot. Born 6/18/10
Missed m/c discovered 1/6/12 at 8-9 weeks
D&C 1/10/12
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Re: Co-sleeping = no napping at daycare?

  • is he new at daycare? I know that a lot of my friends had this problem as well and they did NOT co-sleep. I think it's a transitional phase at daycare of getting accustomed to the new smells, sounds, bright lights, noise of other children, (crying, laughing, playing etc) that gets them

    My son for the first 2 months was taking 20 minute crapnaps at daycare. Now he's been there a few months and he'll throw down a good 1-2 hour nap.

     

    As far as the CIO, I feel that is not what your daycare was doing (at least, not properly) as much as they are over booked or understaffed to manage the amount of infants they are caring for and couldn't give your baby the time or nurturing he needed.

     

    We are anti cio, co-sleepers as well and I have to say, after the transitional phase of getting used to daycare, DS really is napping great. Hang in there mama.

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  • We cosleep with DS, and he is in daycare. He goes through phases of napping well then not so well both at home and daycare. In fact, he naps better at daycare lately. Hopefully it will pass soon. DS is cranky when he doesn't nap well. I've struggled with the thought that I'm not raising DS the same way with him in daycare as I would if I didn't work outside the home too. We aren't crazy about one of his teachers, and he doesn't get as much individual attention there. But he is a happy, growing, thriving, well adjusted kid. It's mostly mommy guilt. I worry more than I need to, and that probably won't stop. I would not do well as a SAHM, and I know deep down that daycare is working out fine. Better than fine, really. DS is still "attached" to me.
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  • We bedshare and our son went through a period of about 2 months when he just wouldn't nap at daycare (this was from 7-9 months or so). He was napping absolutely fine at home at that time. The DCPs also let him cry, despite explicit instructions against this (and it did nothing). I was very upset about, still am, but they seem to understand where I'm coming from now. Anyway, it was a tough period of time, but it stopped as suddenly as it started and he just started napping again! He still doesn't nap as well there as at home in our bed, but it's good enough. Hopefully the same will happen for you!
  • Oh thanks for the stories you guys. And no, he's not new at daycare, he's been there for almost 4 months now, but he goes through periods where he will and won't nap there, but yesterday really upset me when she told me how little he slept and how long she let him cry.

    I feel better hearing your stories, and you're right, there's probably a lot of mom guilt mixed in there for not being able to be with him all the time.

    I know it's a phase, but it really helps to hear it from other people sometimes. Thanks.

    DX PCOS, Endometriosis 2009
    Eliot. Born 6/18/10
    Missed m/c discovered 1/6/12 at 8-9 weeks
    D&C 1/10/12
    My Blog
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • imagesensoregurl:

    Some days I question if the fact that I work out of the home makes it so that I can't raise my child the way I want him to be raised. Twice this week he's had people try and let him cry it out (grandma and daycare). They won't try again, but in some ways I feel like there are probably a whole bunch of things that they'll do that I wouldn't do. How do I come to terms with that?

    I don't really have any advice, but wanted to say that I am struggling with the exact same thing. Hang in there, mama.


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  • imageBlindysWife:
    imagesensoregurl:

    Some days I question if the fact that I work out of the home makes it so that I can't raise my child the way I want him to be raised. Twice this week he's had people try and let him cry it out (grandma and daycare). They won't try again, but in some ways I feel like there are probably a whole bunch of things that they'll do that I wouldn't do. How do I come to terms with that?

    I don't really have any advice, but wanted to say that I am struggling with the exact same thing. Hang in there, mama.

    Thanks, glad to know we're in the same boat! I like that he'll see his mom with a career too though (not that there's anything wrong with SAHM). It's a balance, we can't have it all and we all make choices. Sometimes it's hard to know which ones are the right choices, even after you thought you'd made up your mind!

    DX PCOS, Endometriosis 2009
    Eliot. Born 6/18/10
    Missed m/c discovered 1/6/12 at 8-9 weeks
    D&C 1/10/12
    My Blog
    Pregnancy Ticker
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