NAPR-I think I just had a miscarriage.

rianals · February 2011

So, I'm posting here because I just need to get this out there and need a little advice and am not ready to move off of my "comfort board." I'll try to keep this fairly short...

DH and I are trying for baby #2. I took an HPT a few days ago and it was negative. A couple days later, I developed some pretty intense pelvic pain. The pain lasted for about four days. On day three, it seemed that my period started, but the bleeding was not really normal for me. The next day, I went to Urgent Care and was told that I didn't have a UTI, so it must be a bacterial vaginal infection (which couldn't be tested for because of the bleeding.) After a big go-around about treatment, including the nurse practitioner saying, "This medication isn't safe for breastfeeding, so you will just have to stop for ten days. Your daughter is old enough." (DD is 19 months.) we finally came up with a treatment that would work.

When I got home, I went online and realized that my symptoms didn't match the typical presentation of her diagnosis and decided that I wasn't going to take a maybe safe medication for a condition that I might have. It just didn't feel right in my head.

So, I did a little more googling and reading of symptoms. Then, I took another pregnancy test. It was positive. That was yesterday. The pelvic pain/cramping is mostly gone. The bleeding is mostly gone. Today I took another pregnancy test and it was negative. So, at this point, my self-diagnosis is that I had a very, very early miscarriage.

I really don't know what, if anything I should do. Should I call my doctor? If I do, should I wait until Monday when she is in the office, or have her phone service contact her at home today?

I'm just kind of bummed and kind of worried and really cranky with Urgent Care. Any thoughts?

Ananke · February 2011

I would call your OB to confirm, but I would wait until Monday. It's also possible you are pregnant and the bleeding/cramping was implantation.

I'm sorry you're going through this - I'd be cranky and upset also.

MoonlessNight · February 2011

I wish I had something helpful to say. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and I hope it wasn't a miscarriage but if it was I feel for you and I'm sorry. Keep us posted.

nekorayne · February 2011

MoonlessNight:
I wish I had something helpful to say. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry and I hope it wasn't a miscarriage but if it was I feel for you and I'm sorry. Keep us posted.

All this! ::hugs::

I'm so sorry you are going through this, just the not knowing would be so hard. I really will keep you in my thoughts

Bride2b2004 · February 2011

I'm sorry you are in this limbo. Sometimes we unfortunately really get to see the gaps in knowledge of our medical care providers. I had about a month in limbo-land not knowing wth was wrong with me... it turned out to be an ectopic pregnancy that didn't resolve on its own and that month could have meant my life if things went differently. Thankfully I ended up at a RE who knew what to do right away once I finally went to him.

You need to go to a doctor you think is knowledgeable and trustworthy. If you don't think you are getting to the bottom of things, go to a specialist. At the very least, make sure you get a blood test that quantitatively measures HCG and if there is a reading, I would follow it to make sure it resolves to 0. Or, on a more positive note, continues to double as it should.

I am sorry you are going through this. I hope you get answers soon (hugs)

StrawberryAlarmClock · February 2011

I'm so sorry. I don't know enough to tell you if I think you did or not but I would definitely follow up with your OB. Monday (Tues b/c of the holiday??) if you are comfortable now but sooner if you're still crampy. You want to be sure it wasn't ectopic. Big huge hugs. I'm sorry yours going through this.

And that's awesome that you're still BFing!

daenikoffre · February 2011

Good luck.

LouiseB2001 · February 2011

I'm really sorry you are going through this. Just my 5 cents: When I got pregnant with DD I had implantation pain: two nights of what felt like period pain. (Btw I stupidly took ibuprofen for it because 'I know what a period feels like' and thought I then wasn't pregnant.) It is also common to have implantation bleeding and some women bleed lightly throughout their pregnancy. I think you are right that you had an early miscarriage but you also might still be pregnant. Early tests are unlikely to show anything definite so perhaps even try again in a couple of days. If it was a miscarriage think of it as this: the fetus wasn't viable and this happens all the time. There is nothing wrong with you and you can probably easily conceive again (that helped for me at least). {}hugs}}

xnbride · February 2011

I am so sorry to hear that. If the bleeding and cramping persists then call your doc. I hope you have a quick recovery and get a BFP soon with your take home baby #2.

pepomntpat · February 2011

I am sorry you are dealing with this. I'd probably call the doctor on Monday to get checked for certain, but the general rule of thumb with m/c is that it is not an emergency unless you are soaking through a pad in an hour or you are in extreme pain or have a fever. {{HUGE HUGS}}

happyhoopla · February 2011

I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this. Even though it was early, it's still incredibly painful to have a m/c. *big hugs*

rianals · February 2011

Thanks a lot, everyone. I am glad the concensus is to wait to call the dr. until after the weekend. That's what my gut says, but I just wanted a second opinion.

The pain and bleeding is pretty close to gone, so that is good, I guess.

My DD is pretty sweet and keeping me busy, so I am really appreciating her, even though she has no idea that anything unusual is going on.

I think I'm dealing okay. It really is so early that I didn't really think that I was pregnant until I realized I probably wasn't anymore. On a kind of crappy note, today my SIL asked me when DH and I were going to have baby #2...I just told her that we're thinking about it. I'm really not ready to talk to anyone IRL about this, yet.

Thanks again...

Tonya_G · February 2011

I would also call your OB- they'll probably want to check your HCG levels just to make sure they've returned back to zero, maybe even check out your tubes to make sure it wasn't ectopic or anything. Plus, in case for some reason you have difficulty getting pg with #2, having this documented could be helpful.

Tonya_G · February 2011

LouiseB2001:

I'm really sorry you are going through this. Just my 5 cents: When I got pregnant with DD I had implantation pain: two nights of what felt like period pain. (Btw I stupidly took ibuprofen for it because 'I know what a period feels like' and thought I then wasn't pregnant.) It is also common to have implantation bleeding and some women bleed lightly throughout their pregnancy. I think you are right that you had an early miscarriage but you also might still be pregnant. Early tests are unlikely to show anything definite so perhaps even try again in a couple of days. If it was a miscarriage think of it as this: the fetus wasn't viable and this happens all the time. There is nothing wrong with you and you can probably easily conceive again (that helped for me at least). {}hugs}

}

I'm sorry, but as someone who's gone through two m/c's... I wouldn't recommend saying this to anyone who's gone through one. If someone had said that to me when I went through either one, I would have been really, really hurt, and possibly really pissed off. And you don't know that there isn't something wrong with a person who m/c's- I have MTHFR and PAI-1, both of which can cause repeated m/c's. The best thing you can say to someone who is going through a loss, even a very early one, is I'm very sorry, and if you need anything, let me know how I can help. Those two phrases were the only ones that I could bear to hear during that time.

someflower6 · February 2011

i'm sorry to hear this. i agree with the previous posters about calling your doc, but i just want to warn you that some drs are not very sensitive about these things... they're very matter of fact. i *hope* your dr will let you come in and take blood work, check your hcg levels etc. but s/he very well may say "is the hpt positive? are you still bleeding?" if both of these answers are no, s/he may not ask you to come in unless something new develops (suddenly starting to bleed again, a positive test, etc).

i'm really sorry. i hope that you can get some kind of resolution through this tough time.

Army_Wife_04 · February 2011

I'm sorry you are going through this. I am also dealing with this right now, I have known for a couple of weeks that the baby stopped developing and had no heartbeat, but I chose to wait on a natural miscarriage which I am still waiting for. It is a really hard thing to deal with, and the waiting is getting unbearable. I will also call my doctor on Tuesday (they are closed Monday) and hopefully just be able to get this all over with. Hugs to you, and good luck with trying again soon.

I also agree with PP who said that telling someone that there was probably something wrong with the fetus is not helpful. No one wants to hear that when they miscarry, and this statement has angered my husband and I more than a few times in the last couple of weeks. I am sure there was no harm meant in that statement, but please be aware it is hurtful to someone going through a miscarriage at any stage.

Kersbear · February 2011

I am so sorry. Definitely call Monday morning to see your OB.

rainlily · February 2011

I am so sorry. Call your doc on Monday. Try to get some rest tomorrow.

webMistress0609 · February 2011

I had something similar happen about 2 years before I conceived Ari. Period was a few days late, had a BFP, 2 days later I had some pretty awful cramping & bleeding. I was able to get in with the doc on Monday (mine also happened over the weekend), who basically confirmed my cervix had closed & that my HCG levels were back down.

So sorry this happened mama. Rest up as much as you can & let your body & mind heal. I felt really crappy for a few days - just tired, then it was okay.

happyhoopla · February 2011

Tonya_G:
LouiseB2001:

I'm really sorry you are going through this. Just my 5 cents: When I got pregnant with DD I had implantation pain: two nights of what felt like period pain. (Btw I stupidly took ibuprofen for it because 'I know what a period feels like' and thought I then wasn't pregnant.) It is also common to have implantation bleeding and some women bleed lightly throughout their pregnancy. I think you are right that you had an early miscarriage but you also might still be pregnant. Early tests are unlikely to show anything definite so perhaps even try again in a couple of days. If it was a miscarriage think of it as this: the fetus wasn't viable and this happens all the time. There is nothing wrong with you and you can probably easily conceive again (that helped for me at least). {}hugs}
}
I'm sorry, but as someone who's gone through two m/c's... I wouldn't recommend saying this to anyone who's gone through one. If someone had said that to me when I went through either one, I would have been really, really hurt, and possibly really pissed off. And you don't know that there isn't something wrong with a person who m/c's- I have MTHFR and PAI-1, both of which can cause repeated m/c's. The best thing you can say to someone who is going through a loss, even a very early one, is I'm very sorry, and if you need anything, let me know how I can help. Those two phrases were the only ones that I could bear to hear during that time.

Agreed.

cynnnabun · February 2011

I'm lurking here, and I have to share.

First, I am very sorry you're going through this. And I *believe* the exact same thing happened to me. Back in June I woke up with my period, right about when I would get my period (we weren't TTC.) so, no big deal. Well, I always get cramps, but what I got was pretty intense. To the point where I thought maybe I had appendicitis or something of the sort. It hurt, bad.

I was actually on my way out the door to go to the ER, just in case, and my mom called and asked if maybe I was pregnant. So, I took a test and it was positive. I cried and felt awful, and about 3 days later my bleeding was minimal and a second test came up negative.

I personally didn't go to the doctor, I just waited a couple weeks and tested again. But, I really would go if I were you. At least to just have your levels tested.

I found out in August we were expecting, and I'm 30 weeks now. So, just know, you aren't alone. I believe I had a super early miscarriage too. And know that you can feel however you want to feel about it, even if you didn't know it was there til it wasn't.

Good luck with everything, and I hope you feel better.

Bride2b2004 · February 2011

someflower6:
i'm sorry to hear this. i agree with the previous posters about calling your doc, but i just want to warn you that some drs are not very sensitive about these things... they're very matter of fact. i *hope* your dr will let you come in and take blood work, check your hcg levels etc. but s/he very well may say "is the hpt positive? are you still bleeding?" if both of these answers are no, s/he may not ask you to come in unless something new develops (suddenly starting to bleed again, a positive test, etc).

This is unfortunately too true... but not the best in terms of medical care. I would hope your doctor does as webmistress described- check to make sure the cervix is closed and follow hcg to zero. Given my experience, I would insist upon this (most likely it will just be one simple blood test and you will know everything is over). Anything else, isn't really safe when you don't know exactly what you are dealing with (other than bleeding, pain, + and - hpts).

rianals · February 2011

Thanks again for all of the support. I really appreciate all of the shared stories I am just waiting (and hoping my dr's office will be open) for Monday, now.

I am really happy to have the OB that I have. Every single interaction I have had with her has been great. She has the best bedside manner, listens, and really works to satisfy any concerns that I have. (She has been my gyn. for several years, surgically removed an ovarian cyst, and was my OB for DD.) I wish I had just called her office in the first place. Oh well. What's done is done.

I have thought about this (probably) pregnancy not being viable. It doesn't make me feel any better, but I'm not that sensitive about it, either. I'm trying to squelch the "What if I caused it" thoughts and remember that there is really nothing that can be done to stop an early miscarriage.

I'm also trying to figure out who I want to talk to IRL about this. I have many amazing friends and family, but some are just a little two close, one friend lost a baby at 23 weeks, and a couple other friends are on vacation...DH recently found out that his aunt has terminal cancer, so he doesn't want to even think about a maybe-miscarriage. He has been trying to make me feel better, though.

rianals · February 2011

Update: I just talked to my dr. I was told that if I want to come in to be checked out I can, but if the bleeding stays gone and I am not having any pain, it is fine for me to just hang out. They recommended that I wait until I have one period before TTC again. That's okay with me.

Thanks again for the support and thoughts.

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NAPR-I think I just had a miscarriage.

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