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hway24
member
Using a sibling's name as your child's FN
hway24
member
in Baby Names
What do think of using a dead sibling's name as a first name for your child?
Background: My youngest brother passed away 9 years ago at the age of 12. My other brother recently had a baby boy and named him Brandon, which was my other brother's name. I really hoped they would change their minds, but they didn't. I think it's really weird and I can't bring myself to call the baby Brandon because in my mind that's my brothers name not my nephew's. Noone else in my family except my DH seems to think this.
Also any recommendations on a nickname I could use instead? I haven't been able to think of anything I can use without basically renaming him.
TIA!
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Re: Using a sibling's name as your child's FN
I'm sorry for your loss.
The only NN I've ever heard for Brandon is "Bran". I think if I were in your situation, I would just call my nephew something affectionate like "Buddy" or "Sport" all the time. I'm guessing at some point his name will feel more normal for you. I would hope that no one in the family would contest the use of a cute nickname.
First off, I'm sorry for your loss.
They probably meant it to honor your brother. It may be weird for you, but it is their child, and their choice. It is in bad form to nickname someone else's child, so please don't do it. It is also confusing to the kid.
Married since 06/19/2004|Anna born 11/19/2006|Charles born 11/1/11
Double undergrad graduation May 2011| Me: Psychology, DH: Communication| A long journey!
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I am very sorry for your loss.
I don't think that it is weird that your brother wanted to honor your/his brother by naming his son Brandon. I think it is really tough that people grieve differently because it puts you in a tough situation, but I don't think he was wrong to do it, especially if your parents are OK with it.
I think that you might want to just give it some time, and not try to come up with a big nickname right this minute. The baby's name is Brandon, and that isn't going to change, but maybe you will feel differently about it once you have had more time to get used to the idea and to get to know your nephew.
I am so sorry for your loss.
I don't think it's really appropriate for you to give their son a nickname - that's something that parents can do, but you cannot. I agree with PP: If calling him Brandon makes you uncomfortable right now, just call him "little buddy" or "peanut" or whatever. The name will grow on him and you and you will get used to it. For what it's worth, I always have a hard time calling new babies by their names - it just seems awkward and unnatural to me at first.
Try to be positive about it; this little baby was named in your brother's honor and is his namesake. Baby Brandon is going to grow up knowing that his father loved your brother Brandon so much that he wanted his name to carry on. It's a beautiful thing that your brother has done. I know it must be painful for you, but try to remember that the name was given with the best of intentions.
Ditto.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
I'm sorry for your loss.
You should use your nephew's name, Brandon. It may feel strange at first but over time it will feel more natural. The name was intended to honor your youngest brother, not to replace him. I hope that you will grow to love having the name still around in the family. Good luck.
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