IF-related: Surprise babies?

FeistyFille · February 2011

I'm not PG, nor do I plan to be (probably ever again). But it seems like there are quite a few women on this board who had difficulty conceiving their first and then had a "surprise" pregnancy afterward. I'm just curious about what steps, if any, you were taking to prevent PG later.

I ask because I'm just about to start "real" birth control again. I was taking the progestin-only pill because I had some leftover from when I was trying to breastfeed. I just finished my last pack and will start loestrin today. But my IF issue was that I wasn't ovulating at all. And I'm terrible about taking a daily pill at the exact same time every day. I'm worried that taking the pill (poorly) will actually make me more fertile, if that makes sense. But that's crazy talk, right? I should be on some form of BC, right? Nuvaring (my fave) is too expensive, and NFP only works if you have a somewhat regular cycle, which I don't. Not at all.

Guess I'm asking to be convinced that I should make this effort rather than rely on my body to keep not ovulating. KWIM?

FeistyFille · February 2011

MrsRosie:
No advice on your actual question, but I thought I'd let you know that Loestrin made me a crazier b*tch then I already am.

Faaaantastic. I'm not sure why my gyno prescribed it other than she seemed to have a shitton of free samples. If you don't mind me asking, what are you taking now?

balihaigirl · February 2011

have you thought about getting a mirena? there's no pill to worry about, low side-effects, and i didn't have AF the entire time i had it. LOVED it.

ali-1411 · February 2011

I don't know anything about the science behind it but I'd stay get on some kind of birth control unless you are okay with getting pregnant again. Because you just never know.

FeistyFille · February 2011

balihaigirl:
have you thought about getting a mirena. there's no pill to worry about, low side-effects, and i didn't have AF the entire time i had it. LOVED it.

I have thought about it. The idea just scares me for some reason. It's probably irrational, but the thought of not having an AF, cramping, and spotting for up to 6 months have me a little gun shy.

naclh2otaffy · February 2011

Use some sort of regular birth control.

I don't ovulate on my own either. Except in the 4 years between kids I started having random regular periods. (We used condoms, so I wasn't on any birth control pills that would have caused this). I'd have two or three and then I'd stop again for a year or so, then I'd have a few more. I bought a CBEFM to see if I might be ovulating (wasn't TTC at that point) and was surprised to see that I was ovulating on some of those cycles. Of course, when I was ready to have another baby I stopped ovulating again and needing a couple rounds of fertility drugs.

There's always IUD or condoms if you don't want to do a pill. Is Nuvaring any cheaper being filled at the campus pharmacy?

JenniferL923 · February 2011

I would say you should definitely be on some form of BC if you are not ok with getting pg.

Dr. V at Texas Fertility Center told us that we had a 2-3% every month (versus a "normal" 20%) of getting pg on our own. It took 29 cycles, but we somehow got pg with DD. Well, I thought we had hit the jackpot and used up our miracle.

My problems haven't been fixed, unless you count the lap I had to remove the endo (but the tube was still blocked) and it still took 17 cycles after to conceive DD.

Needless to say, we are still floored that we are pg again without any intervention. We were not using any protection, but were not trying either. We TRIED with DD.

So moral of the story is, if you aren't ok with a surprise, you probably should be on some kind of BCP. Just because you needed help previously doesn't mean your body hasn't figured things out itself.

Nessia · February 2011

FeistyFille:
It's probably irrational, but the thought of not having an AF, cramping, and spotting for up to 6 months have me a little gun shy.

This is why I would want it. Stick out tongue

FeistyFille · February 2011

naclh2otaffy:
Use some sort of regular birth control.
I don't ovulate on my own either. Except in the 4 years between kids I started having random regular periods. (We used condoms, so I wasn't on any birth control pills that would have caused this). I'd have two or three and then I'd stop again for a year or so, then I'd have a few more. I bought a CBEFM to see if I might be ovulating (wasn't TTC at that point) and was surprised to see that I was ovulating on some of those cycles.

This is my biggest fear, and I guess I just need to hear that it happens.

naclh20taffy:

Is Nuvaring any cheaper being filled at the campus pharmacy?

They stopped giving their awesome discounts years ago. It about broke my heart.

Kim777 · February 2011

I would definitely say you should be on something unless you are okay with a surprise. Totally different deal since we have MFI, but Dr. V gave us less than a 1% chance of ever conceiving on our own, yet I did get pregnant once on my own. Even less than 1% is still greater than 0% so you just never know!

smb29 · February 2011

I took Loestrin for 11 years and never had the problems that Rosie had. When I took the 24 day pack I never had a period. Yaz, on the other hand, made me crazy, depressed and overwhelmed by life. My doc said different pills use different forms of meds like progesterone, and people react differently to them. I never had a problem taking the pill daily, but I think I'm going to try an IUD after we have a second kid and then get permanently fixed (or make dh do it) after I turn 40. If you aren't sure that you want another baby, I'd definitely use something and not leave it to chance.

richardslove · February 2011

MrsRosie:
FeistyFille:

MrsRosie:
No advice on your actual question, but I thought I'd let you know that Loestrin made me a crazier b*tch then I already am.

Faaaantastic. I'm not sure why my gyno prescribed it other than she seemed to have a shitton of free samples. If you don't mind me asking, what are you taking now?

I have a Mirena and I looooove it. I would marry it but we're kind of already married. I highly recommend it. I have mild anxiety issues, and the Loestrin magnified my anxiety tenfold. I would say almost bordering on paranoia. I thought it was a fluke and changed pills. Fast-forward several years and several BCPs later (I had a lot of breakthrough bleeding so my doc kept trying different pills). She apparently didn't look at my chart and prescribed me a generic of Loestrin (microgestin or something like that). I didn't know it was a generic of Loestrin until I went online to again investigate the increased anxiety and made the discovery.

ETA: I wanted to add that I had spotting for about 2 months on Mirena, and I do have regular periods. They are very short - like 2-3 days - and usually just spotting.

For the second post of the day, I 100% agree with MrsRosie (maybe we should be married)!

I love Mirena. I have had it for 3 years and have no complaints whatsoever. My periods, when I have one, are 1-2 days max with only minimal spotting. It's fabulous!

naclh2otaffy · February 2011

FeistyFille:

naclh20taffy:

Is Nuvaring any cheaper being filled at the campus pharmacy?

They stopped giving their awesome discounts years ago. It about broke my heart.

I was hoping with the new health care changes maybe they'd start offering the discounts again. Bummer...

PrincessBrideSarah · February 2011

I'm currently pregnant with a "surprise" baby after infertility. We weren't preventing after #1's birth because we knew we wanted a second baby. My doctor had told us that pregnancy can be a "cure" for infertility and that some people "get lucky" and are able to get pregnant easily after a struggle with infertility for the prior baby.

So, we were taking our chances but didn't think that we would be the ones to get lucky and have a surprise.

I was on cycle #3 of not preventing, and we weren't trying all that hard, if you know what I mean.

If you need any further motivation to not take the chance of getting pregnant after infertility--I had 2 laparoscopies, 11 IUIs (got pregnant on #10 but miscarried), did three cycles of Femara without IUI, and had stage III endometriosis with okay but not awesome guys on DH's part. We finally got pregnant with DD on IVF #1. We are proof that even people with a really hard time with infertility can have a surprise baby without trying that hard.

In our case, we didn't have a birth control failure, but we certainly didn't expect to get pregnant without really putting any effort into it. Neither of us thought our bodies were capable of making a homemade baby without medical assistance.

FeistyFille · February 2011

naclh2otaffy:
FeistyFille:

naclh20taffy:

Is Nuvaring any cheaper being filled at the campus pharmacy?

They stopped giving their awesome discounts years ago. It about broke my heart.
I was hoping with the new health care changes maybe they'd start offering the discounts again. Bummer...

I think it was the company's doing more than the university's. It went from $15 to $40. Ouch!

Duckie07 · February 2011

If you absolutely do not want to take any hormonal BC, you can use NFP (or FAM-depending on if you would be abstaining during fertile times) even if you don't ovulate. My body has been all sorts of wonky since puberty, including dealing with annovulatory cycles. I had lots of success charting to avoid. However, you have to be diligent in temping, checking CM, etc. Good luck with your decision!

FeistyFille · February 2011

PrincessBrideSarah:
I'm currently pregnant with a "surprise" baby after infertility. We weren't preventing after #1's birth because we knew we wanted a second baby. My doctor had told us that pregnancy can be a "cure" for infertility and that some people "get lucky" and are able to get pregnant easily after a struggle with infertility for the prior baby.
So, we were taking our chances but didn't think that we would be the ones to get lucky and have a surprise.
I was on cycle #3 of not preventing, and we weren't trying all that hard, if you know what I mean.
If you need any further motivation to not take the chance of getting pregnant after infertility--I had 2 laparoscopies, 11 IUIs (got pregnant on #10 but miscarried), did three cycles of Femara without IUI, and had stage III endometriosis with okay but not awesome guys on DH's part. We finally got pregnant with DD on IVF #1. We are proof that even people with a really hard time with infertility can have a surprise baby without trying that hard.
In our case, we didn't have a birth control failure, but we certainly didn't expect to get pregnant without really putting any effort into it. Neither of us thought our bodies were capable of making a homemade baby without medical assistance.

Holy moly! I think I missed this announcement. Congrats! How crazy is that???

BubbleToes · February 2011

Jennifer*L*923:

I would say you should definitely be on some form of BC if you are not ok with getting pg.

Dr. V at Texas Fertility Center told us that we had a 2-3% every month (versus a "normal" 20%) of getting pg on our own. It took 29 cycles, but we somehow got pg with DD. Well, I thought we had hit the jackpot and used up our miracle.

My problems haven't been fixed, unless you count the lap I had to remove the endo (but the tube was still blocked) and it still took 17 cycles after to conceive DD.

Needless to say, we are still floored that we are pg again without any intervention. We were not using any protection, but were not trying either. We TRIED with DD.

So moral of the story is, if you aren't ok with a surprise, you probably should be on some kind of BCP. Just because you needed help previously doesn't mean your body hasn't figured things out itself.

I could have written this (minus the Dr. V and lap stuff). You just never know!

joyco · February 2011

Essure, baby!

joyco · February 2011

MrsRosie:
No advice on your actual question, but I thought I'd let you know that Loestrin made me a crazier b*tch then I already am.

and Ditt.tothehell.o. I hated Loestrin and not only did it make me a jerk, I had NO sex drive (and for someone who started out with none, it sure makes a man grumpy too...haha).

FeistyFille · February 2011

Duckie07:
If you absolutely do not want to take any hormonal BC, you can use NFP (or FAM-depending on if you would be abstaining during fertile times) even if you don't ovulate. My body has been all sorts of wonky since puberty, including dealing with annovulatory cycles. I had lots of success charting to avoid. However, you have to be diligent in temping, checking CM, etc. Good luck with your decision!

I'm worried about relying on this since I'd have absolutely no idea when to expect ovulation or AF. And unless I'm remembering wrong, you could BD & then find out that you're ovulating & it's too late because the swimmers are already there. KWIM?

FeistyFille · February 2011

joyco:
Essure, baby!

Not ready! Not ready! There is maybe a 0.03% chance that we could change our minds so I'm not ready to permanently close that door.

MrsAJL · February 2011

FeistyFille:
joyco:
Essure, baby!
Not ready! Not ready! There is maybe a 0.03% chance that we could change our minds so I'm not ready to permanently close that door.

Then I vote Mirena. That's what I'm doing. And as for Loestrin, I had severe depressive episodes with it. I made the switch to Ortho Tricyclen and didn't have any issues. However, estrogen causes my BP to be slightly elevated hence going the Mirena route.

ndluvsrk · February 2011

I am no help at all.

C'mon, you know you want a baby K3. If you do it, I'l do it. Stick out tongue

kiarox2002 · February 2011

Loestrin and Yaz both made me a crazy b!tch. I finally convinced DH that we should just chance it, but I am *really* hoping for a "surprise" baby. Dr S took a look at my ovaries and said that they looked great after having been on BC and that our best chance of having a baby without treatments was in the next 2 months. Fingers crossed.

I only had one period after Kate's birth before I had the crazy period/ hemorrhage in May. I talked to Dr S about it and he suspects that it was not a period but a miscarriage. Talk about not trying hard. I think we only did the deed once.

If I wasn't suuuuper ready to have another and DH wasn't ok with it, we would be using condoms.

HSartteach · February 2011

I'm just curious. If you worry about remembering to take a pill every day and cost is also a factor, why not use condoms to help prevent pregnancy? I'm not trying to start anything...I am asking honestly. We use condoms. I know that it's not as romantic and it feels better without, but I had the same issues about remembering to take my pill everyday and the cost of birth control every month is also an issue.

I'm not judging or anything, like I said, I'm just curious. It seems to me many of the ladies on here don't use condoms as a form of bc and I just wonder why.

Kim777 · February 2011

HSartteach:
I'm just curious. If you worry about remembering to take a pill every day and cost is also a factor, why not use condoms to help prevent pregnancy? I'm not trying to start anything...I am asking honestly. We use condoms. I know that it's not as romantic and it feels better without, but I had the same issues about remembering to take my pill everyday and the cost of birth control every month is also an issue.
I'm not judging or anything, like I said, I'm just curious. It seems to me many of the ladies on here don't use condoms as a form of bc and I just wonder why.

That would be our method of choice if we were having sex. I know, some of you are totally judging me as a crappy wife right now but unless you have three under three and just finished bf'ing two of them for 17 months you should just shut it. Stick out tongue So assuming my sex drive returns soon condoms would be our best bet because I am not a fan of hormonal birth control. Even though I know I don't want to be pregnant again and if we add to our family it will be through adoption, I am still totally unable to talk myself into any sort of permanent birth control.

shanwalk2 · February 2011

We use a combo of charting to avoid and condoms. We don't use them after I have confirmed ovulation. It's pretty simple and satisfies my desires of no hormonal BC and we can ditch the condoms when we know we are in the safe zone.

FeistyFille · February 2011

I don't think DH would be particularly thrilled with using condoms as our BC method. I bought a box once upon a time, and they sat in our cabinet for, literally, years. I wouldn't care. In fact, it'd be significantly less messy. Stick out tongue We just never have I think because 1) it changes the mood of the moment and 2) the feeling.

I did talk to him about Mirena last night, but we're very concerned about the cost and trying to sort out how much, if any, our new insurance plan would cover. It's surprisingly expensive, and I so wish I had known about it after the birth of my boys, i.e. when my insurance deductible was already met.

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