I am this.close to giving up on BFing for good

Re: I am this.close to giving up on BFing for good

• Pennilyn Novus member

  February 2011

  I'm sorry it's not going well for you.  Whatever happens, you aren't a failure.  Nobody can say you aren't trying.  I hope the appointment with the LC ends up being more helpful for you. 

  Have you visited the Breastfeeding board here?  Or have you contacted the La Leche League to see if they can offer you any additional support? 

  I wish you the best of luck.  
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• Loading the player...
• christyp80

  February 2011

  Don't give up!  I'm so glad you have another LC coming tomorrow.  You don't actually mention what issues you are having, but I'll share this story with you...a good friend of mine had her first little one in October.  She had a terrible birth story, almost bled to death after he was born because the placenta tore, and had to get half her body volume of blood in transfusions.  Because of all this, she wasn't able to BF her son until about 10 hours after his birth.  He screamed and screamed everytime she brought him to her breast, just refused to latch.  She says it was like he hated her breasts.  She started pumping and bottle feeding him because she needed to feed him, but kept trying BFing as well.  She found that giving him part of a bottle so he was calm and not starving, and then offering the breast, was most effective.  Eventually she was able to switch to just the breast, but it took until he was almost a month old!  Good luck, I hope BFing starts working for you!!

  
  
  
  
  

  Report0 Reply
• violaplayer member

  February 2011

  You are not a failure! I'm right there with you - lots of issues with my guys and no success yet. It makes me feel awful.

   

  But I know that I am doing all that I can. And in the end, it's going to be about what works and makes everyone sorta happy.

   

  It sounds like you have been thorough momma. Hang in there and it will get easier. 

  

  Report0 Reply
• psychgalbride member

  February 2011

  Don't give up!  It took me 5 LCs appt before they finally recommended a nipple shield and got DD to latch properly.  We have had one issue after another concerning the breast feeding and I know it would be much easier to just throw in the towel but we have made it this far. 

  I think too many people assume BF will be easy and natural and take no effort.  I'm still pumping most the DD's milk but we are getting closer and closer to her staying on the breast for longer periods of time.  

  The two hour feeding schedule where we would have her on the breast for 10 minutes, then I would pump for 30-45 minutes, then feed her the breastmilk from a bottle was extremely exhausting but well worth it.  She is finally gaining weight and catching on. 
  

  Hang in there. 
  

  
  
  
  

  Report0 Reply
• TheBub member

  February 2011

  Don't give up.  I had a terrible start to BFing with DS.  I cried for weeks because I thought I wasn't doing it right.  I never saw an LC because I read on the Bump that they were $200 per session and never looked in to it.  I ended up going for 10.5 months.  I was so glad that I stuck it out.
  

  On the other hand, you need to do what works best for and your family.  Millions of babies are FF and are just fine.  I went into this pg telling myself that I cannot beat myself up if BFing didn't go well this time.  I now have two children to consider.  Thankfully, things have been much better thius time.  I still have the mindset that it is okay to not be able to go as long with DD.
  

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• ShawnaNKyle member

  February 2011

  I want to encourage you not to give up!  In the end you have to do what is best for baby and you, whether its BFing or FFing, but never feel like you're a failure.  When DS #1 was born, I just assumed that BFing would be easy, but he wouldn't latch.  I spent most of my time in the hospital (4 days due to c/s) with their LC.  When I left the hospital, we had to try to BF, and then pump and give it to him in a bottle for every feeding.  It was exhausting, but I wanted so badly not to give up.  After 2 weeks, he finally started latching with a nipple shield, and we did that for the next 2 weeks.  So, it took basically a month for him to nurse "normally".  It was so worth it, not giving up, and I even went through that 1st month with getting mastitis too.  Good luck, I hope it works out for you!
  

  Report0 Reply
• Jaylea

  February 2011

  Was he early?  DD was born at 37 weeks and a few days and she couldn't latch/suck for a few weeks. i did the syringe/finger feeding too and it was HARD.  But then, one day, she just got it. And that was that. It happened on her due date.

  Here's the thing - you need to take care of YOU too.  So if it's getting to be too much and overwhelming, then you need to cut yourself a break and realize that in the grand scheme of things, it is perfectly fine to feed your baby formula. We're our own worst enemies - I remember feeling like you do.  I don't know that I would go through that again, to be honest, but it's hard to say when I'm not facing it right now.

  Good luck - we are all here to support you! You have not at all failed - look at how much work you're doing to try to feed him! You don't have control over his ability to latch and suck, and you have to take it easy on yourself!

  

  Report0 Reply