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May 2011 Moms
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So no one in my fam/friends are throwing me a shower...

trixie2003trixie2003 member
in May 2011 Moms

So I feel really bad feeling kind of upset about this, but it really doesn't seem like anyone in my family or friends are planning me a baby shower. I've had several friends ask "so when is your shower?" but I don't really know what I am suppose to say... "Umm, shouldn't you know?!"

I hinted to my sister, "hey I've had friends ask about a baby shower, is that something I am suppose to do?" and she just said "well its up to family and friends to offer to throw you a shower, but you shouldn't plan one because that's rude for you to host one". (which I understand!). But then she didn't say anything like "oh I should talk to mom about planning one" and that was over a month ago.

 My office is planning me a little shower, but is anyone else having this similar experience? I didn't have this problem with my bridal shower, so I don't really know how to react and I feel guilty expecting a baby shower, but at the same time I feel really bummed. What should I do?

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Re: So no one in my fam/friends are throwing me a shower...

  • Temp38995750004016Temp38995750004016 member
    Yuck! You would think your sis would take the hint. = (
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  • mrs pHmrs pH

    Your family is probably planning a surprise shower.....

    I don't think your sister would let anything on if it's a surprise. 

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  • sparkymcgeeesparkymcgeee member

    I can relate. I felt this way too and dropped a hint or two and got the same ambivalence from my sister. 

    Then last week I was at my brother's house for the superbowl and my two SIL's brought it up and said they had been planning one for the end of March and just hadn't talked to me about it yet. Maybe that's the same deal for your situation. Maybe your mom is planning one and just hadn't talked to you yet. 

    It is an awkward situation. Sorry.



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  • AMYRENEE27AMYRENEE27
    imagemrs pH:

    Your family is probably planning a surprise shower.....

    I don't think your sister would let anything on if it's a surprise. 

    That is what I was thinking.

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  • Bridezilla in TrainingBridezilla in Training
    Hopefully it's a complete surprise!! :)
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  • amber1858amber1858 member

    well hopefully they have something planned for you! I know it seems kind of selfish to EXPECT a babyshower but i would be really hurt if noone planned one for me... and i dont even mean about the presents or anything it just seems like tradition and to really look forward to seeing friends/family together! expecially if its your first (it is mine) Hopefully everything works out for you!!!

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  • amatistajoyamatistajoy member
    At this point, I really havent heard I will be having one either. I am trying to be patient, and just focus on the positive - my baby is special and loved (and so am I) even if there isn't a shower.
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  • bluecasbahbluecasbah member
     No one is throwing me one, not even a little one at work.  I feel like I want to cry.  People keep asking when my shower is and I don't even know how to respond.
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  • Lari29Lari29
    I'm not getting one from my family either.  My mother is very traditional minded - she finds it inappropriate for family members to throw showers.  My husband's family is not involved in our lives.  I'm having a sprinkle from some co-workers, which I'm grateful for that - but we're all poor residents in medicine, so no big ticket items.
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  • CallidryasCallidryas member
    For you ladies who don't know how to respond to 'when is your shower' questions: How about saying 'No one has offered to hostess one yet.' or 'I don't think one is being planned yet.'  It lets them know you are interested, but that no one has stepped up to take it on. 
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  • heikem87heikem87
    Dont think any of my friends are planning on throwing a shower for me and my mom or my sister both think it?s stupid. So probably no shower for me but I am totally fine with it!
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  • LegalLadyBugLegalLadyBug member

    imageCallidryas:
    For you ladies who don't know how to respond to 'when is your shower' questions: How about saying 'No one has offered to hostess one yet.' or 'I don't think one is being planned yet.'  It lets them know you are interested, but that no one has stepped up to take it on. 

    This. 

    As far as I know I am not having a shower but people ask me when it is all the time (and yes, this is my first). I just say that I don't think anybody is throwing me one. I don't find it rude to say that because it's true, and if the person asking wants to throw me one they can. 


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  • trixie2003trixie2003 member

    Well I am glad to know I am not the only one...If I could host a baby shower for you all I would!

     Someone made a good point that the greatest gift is our little one. Maybe the better gift than a bridal shower would be to treat ourselves to a "fun day" of a massage, manicures, etc. That's what I am planning!

    Also, good suggestion on just saying "well, no one has planned one". Gives a hint without being rude.

     Thanks again all!

     

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