Need to get her sleeping through the night!EDIT/groan.

mjlewis101 · February 2011

So my husband is leaving for 7mos in 8 weeks. I have a 5 week old preemie and for my sanity, would like to have her mostly sleeping through the night by the time he leaves. She really is only up once in the middle of the night, then not till anywhere from 6:30-8:30 for her morning feed. Her last night time feed is usually between 10:30-11:30.

What should I be doing to cut out/delay that middle feed? It's anywhere between 2 and 4am and is really the only thing in our 24hr bubble of a day that kills me. That is the one that my DH usually steps up to help out with because I'm pretty much cranky and barely functioning at that time. I've been trying to nap more during the day, but just can't sleep during the day.

Advice? Tips?

TIA!

missfire · February 2011

You can't make her stomach mature any faster than it does on its own. She won't sleep through the night until her stomach will hold enough to last all night. You can make sure you feed her on a strict schedule during the day so that at night she's as ready as she can be to last an extra hour or two, but I doubt it will make her sleep through the whole night.

They all have their own schedule for this. My older DS didn't sleep through the night until he was about 1-1/2 years old.

Mrslovebugs · February 2011

At 5 weeks I don't think y ou want to be trying to skip feedings. Are you back at work already? If not, then nap during the day...

CGKyle · February 2011

If she's only up once in the middle of the night I kinda just wanna tell you to suck it Up! DD is up 3-4 times a night. She's up for a reason, don't try to cut out a feeding.

sparklesbrooks · February 2011

You're actually pretty lucky. My LO is up at least 3 times at night!

amwallace · February 2011

I've heard that sleeping through the night is also influenced by the babys weight. Although all kids are different, if you have a premie, most likely they have some catching up to do so that night feeding is important. When your LO is older and bigger, you could offer the pacifier when the LO first starts waking up to try delaying the feeding. But the problem with that is you'll end up getting up more times at night. It seems to be getting easier to go without sleep - my body feels used to it now. You can do it! Once or twice a night isn't bad at all.

Hot Sauce on a Stick · February 2011

DS STTN his first night home from the hospital (he slept 7 hours straight - close enough!). DD didn't STTN until she was 10 months old. We didn't do anything different with either one. There is nothing you can do to make her STTN, unfortunately. You're just going to have to hope for the best. She's young and she still needs that feeding at 2AM.

mishu917 · February 2011

Seeing that you're the adult here and you're more adaptable, you should be the one adapting to her schedule and NOT the other way around. If you are so tired, then you should nap when she naps, just like how you're basically saying she should sleep through the night because you're doing that (who does that??). I have the same schedule as you do and I consider myself one of the lucky people out there bc I've heard of babies waking up every hour during the night. Please accept your blessing and don't have any expectations, your LO is already great as it is.

ctrudell310 · February 2011

I also have a preemie (born 6 weeks early). She is almost 7 weeks old and she wakes up every 1-2 hrs at night! Just consider yourself lucky to be getting such a good stretch at such a young age. It will become a longer and longer stretch as she becomes bigger and her stomach can hold more. But for now...consider once a night a blessing!

IncogNeato · February 2011

Sorry, no advice. Your LO is feeding because she (he?) NEEDS to, especialy being a preemie. It's too early to STTN. Sorry. My 8 week premie still usually wakes multiple times a night and I'm on my own 5 nights a week. It sucks but it's parenthood! Heck, this week she woke up every hour for two nights . I could barely see straight but I had no choice but to deal! Once a night is awesome- be thankful and hope it stays that way! Mine didn't!

mrsashby · February 2011

mishu917:
Seeing that you're the adult here and you're more adaptable, you should be the one adapting to her schedule and NOT the other way around. If you are so tired, then you should nap when she naps, just like how you're basically saying she should sleep through the night because you're doing that (who does that??). I have the same schedule as you do and I consider myself one of the lucky people out there bc I've heard of babies waking up every hour during the night. Please accept your blessing and don't have any expectations, your LO is already great as it is.

This...

NewFamily09 · February 2011

I kind of feel bad for your baby, being rushed to mature faster than she's ready. I think it's better if you just deal with the night feedings, as hard as they are. Some people have to get up every 2 hours at night to feed, so it sounds like you really don't have it that bad. Just remember that it's only temporary. Eventually she will sleep through the night on her own, maybe by some miracle it'll be before your DH leaves.

AnneEliz79 · February 2011

You can try reading "Twelve Hours Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old". She's too young right now for you to cut out that feeding, but as another poster said you can try to stretch out the times by offering a pacifier. You can try the techniques in the book, or your LO may just naturally drop that feeding in the next six weeks. My DD actually dropped the 10pm-12am feeding a couple weeks ago, so she's sleeping 8/9-3/4am, then up "for the day" around 7ish. I'd love to drop that 3am feeding as well!

Jinsy80 · February 2011

Please feed your baby when he/she is hungryI I'm sorry, but I think this post is crazy. You're basically complaining that your 5 week old is up once a night to eat? My 10 week old is up 2-3 times during the night, and that's still completely normal. I don't know anything about preemies, but I suspect the pediatricians told you to feed her every 2 hours or so? Or pediatrician was happy that DD2 was still getting up to eat, and she over 11lbs.

JoannaJes · February 2011

I agree with PPs. Suck it up. You are only getting up once a night. Did you not know before you decided to get pregnant that babies don't STTN?

themissizz · February 2011

Grow up and take a nap during the day if you need it.

Your baby will cut out that middle feed on their own when she no longer needs it, it's not up to you to dictate when your kid is hungry.

GracieWK · February 2011

Max is up usually twice a night (1am & 4am) and I work 45-50hrs a week. I'm the only one who gets up with him since DH goes to work at 4am, so I kinda don't have much sympathy for you, cause I'd do almost anything to get Max to waking up only once a night.

She'll STTN when she's good and ready.

JenGarden · February 2011

Good luck with that. My LO was up every 2-3 hours until this week (eight weeks), and even now, she is still up two or three times/night (we put her down around 8 and if I'm LUCKY she sleeps until 1 and is then up again at 5 and up for the day at 8 - this is a good night for us). DH is back to work, so I do this myself.

laceysmom82 · February 2011

sparklesbrooks:
You're actually pretty lucky. My LO is up at least 3 times at night!

Tnis. I'm totally jealous. My LO is up at least twice during the night (and she's 7 weeks old!)

blondek8 · February 2011

::lurking from 3-6::

You're lucky. I've got two 16lb twins that get up at least once, if not twice a night to eat a full 6oz bottle still. At 4 months the longest stretch we get out of them right now is 6 hours. That 6 hours is maybe once or twice a week. Last night they both had a bottle at 7pm and went to bed, woke for bottles at 1100, 0200 and 0630 and up for the day.

You can't make a baby STTN. They'll do it on their own time. It's another developmental milestone that some babies get to earlier than others.

Jackswife123 · February 2011

Seriously? My son didn't sleep through the night until he was 7 months. I WISH my 5 week old was only up once.

Suck it up and deal with it. You signed up for this when you got pregnant. Feed your baby.

tmp-493670500007520 · February 2011

Feed your baby. That's the only advice I have.

Oh and... 5 week olds rarely STTN. My child didnt STTN regularly until 10 months.

LittleApple · February 2011

You wanted a baby and this is what you signed up for. I am sure we would all like to have our kids STTN for our sanity, but you know what? Your child should come first before your need to sleep.

Grow up and start being a parent.

futuremrssugrue2010 · February 2011

You can't force a baby not to eat; they need to, especially preemies. Take naps. I know at when my son was 5 weeks, it was so hard to adjust to not sleeping as much but you're more able to adjust than your baby is and you'll get used to not sleeping.

mavs_girl07 · February 2011

Dude, seriously? You can't handle waking up for one feeding? Go to bed when she goes to bed, take a nap when she naps during the day...you're a grown woman and you should be able to handle getting up once a night. What's going to happen when she's sick, teething, going through a wakeful phase, or any of the other things that babies wake up for several times a night? Sorry, no sympathy or advice here.

Chelle112 · February 2011

Really? DS just dropped his 3am feeding...he's almost 11 months. Your baby, whose belly is still tiny, by the way, is waking up because she needs to eat. Get used to it.

MSC03 · February 2011

Suck it up and just feed your baby.

my*heart*is*his · February 2011

Suck it up. Ever heard of the 4th trimester? Where babies are too big to be in mommy's belly but aren't quite ready for the real world? Well, you have a preemie, who is even LESS ready for the real world.

Learn to nap during the day. If you're tired enough you will make it happen. I've had TWO preemies and neither one STTN until they were at least 3 months old. My 5-month old (3 1/2 months adjusted) is STILL routinely up once a night to eat, and you know what? I get up and feed her. When she is ready she will STTN.

I find it sad that when you are "cranky and barely functioning" that your DH has to step up. What are you going to do when he's gone for 7 months and you have a bad day and are cranky? Being a mom means being on ALL.THE.TIME. Cranky or not.

blondie42107 · February 2011

You have a newborn that is also a premie...

Please let your baby decide when she's ready to STTN. Waking is needed for feedings and also reduces the risk of SIDS. Nap more if you need to and realize it won't last forever.

CinemaGoddess · February 2011

LittleGus · February 2011

Dude - 5 weeks old and only getting up once to eat? Count your blessings! DD is 13 weeks and will occasionally still be up to eat at 4. Please please please do NOT try to eliminate a feeding already.

Ananke · February 2011

Basically, you're saying that if you don't get a straight 8 hours of sleep, you're cranky and barely functioning?! How the heck did you make it through the third trimester? I'm glad your sleep is more important than your baby's hunger.

How much of a preemie is she? Really, it doesn't matter, because at 5 weeks, it's waaaaayyyy too early to try to force her to STTN. Many babies won't STTN until they are 2 years old or more!! Personally, I'd kill for a 4 hour stretch, and my baby is 5 months old. He's been waking every 1-2 hours all night long for the last 6 weeks due to teething and developmental milestones. I didn't get to sleep until 4 am last night because he wanted to practice making a 'b' sound all night.

I suggest befriending Coffee.

If you need help, call a friend or family member, but don't try to force your baby into something she's not ready for.

Chrissy1019 · February 2011

cinema_goddess:

This......... and seriously OP- my 17 week old wakes up at least 3 times a night and you complain that your 5 week old wakes up once? FFS

ToledoDeux · February 2011

Once your husband is gone and not taking the middle of the night feeding, you'll get over your inability to sleep during the day. Trust.

mishu917 · February 2011

ToledoDeux:
Once your husband is gone and not taking the middle of the night feeding, you'll get over your inability to sleep during the day. Trust.

True, I was like that. Not that my husband is gone or anything but now I've learned to take 20 min naps lol

racheldaigle46 · February 2011

my*heart*is*his:

Suck it up. Ever heard of the 4th trimester? Where babies are too big to be in mommy's belly but aren't quite ready for the real world? Well, you have a preemie, who is even LESS ready for the real world.

Learn to nap during the day. If you're tired enough you will make it happen. I've had TWO preemies and neither one STTN until they were at least 3 months old. My 5-month old (3 1/2 months adjusted) is STILL routinely up once a night to eat, and you know what? I get up and feed her. When she is ready she will STTN.

I find it sad that when you are "cranky and barely functioning" that your DH has to step up. What are you going to do when he's gone for 7 months and you have a bad day and are cranky? Being a mom means being on ALL.THE.TIME. Cranky or not.

hmp1 · February 2011

Did I read that your DH does the 4am feeding right now?? Most of our DH/SO's are back to work so we are all getting up for the night feedings. And when I go back to work, I will still be the one doing the feedings. Yes, no sleep sucks but you get use to it. I love how snuggly DS is during the night feeding(s).

My advice: Fill up your DVR or bump on your phone. There is always someone up at that time too.

ASmallWonder · February 2011

Yeeeaaahhh.... My son is 9 months old and still gets up once a night and his pedi still tells me that it's "fine" and "normal." I really don't mind, though I'd love if he STTN. 5 weeks old and you can't handle waking up once?! Did someone mislead you into thinking babies STTN right away?

leslienpete · February 2011

Your baby is up 1x a night and you can't handle it? I have a 2yo and a 7wo who is up 1x a night and I handle it just fine. No napping for me during the day. A feeding takes, what 20 min. at the most? It's not like you're missing out on tons of sleep.

Feed your child.

PunkyBooster · February 2011

Maybe she'll be sleeping through the night by then. Feed her when she's hungry. I wouldn't delay anything.

While I won't say "I feel sorry for your DD" I do think you need to change your attitude about it. I understand single parenting- DH is gone for a 5 week stretch, so I know it's not easy, but DS just started cutting his night time meals down to 1. Look at it that this is a special time shared between you and your DD. I love being up in the house with him, just the 2 of us awake. We won't have many more weeks of this left, and that makes me sad. I think it's all about your attitude.

I think when DS was about 10 weeks he was only getting up for 1 overnight feeding. I think doing that at 1 month is really great. I consider myself blessed with a great sleeper and he sleeps 9ish-2ish then again until 5 or 6ish.

Part of being a mom is learning to survive on less (or little) sleep. Find a coffee or tea you love and treasure this time with your DD. It goes by too quickly, IMO .

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