xp: importance of pre-school for 3 year old?

Heather R · February 2011

My son has a nanny while we work and will be 3 in late May.

If I send him to pre-school at age 3, I prefer to use a place specialized in education (like local private schools) versus a daycare center. Of course, this is expensive.

I really don't have experience or perspective on this. So my question is: for a 4 y.o., pre-school seems a given. But what is the concensus of its importance for 3 y.o.'s?

jlw2505 · February 2011

My kids have been in daycare FT since they were infants, at a daycare center and then my 4 year old moved to a PreK program through the public school this past fall. I think for a 3 year old, the importance of preschool really centers around the social side of things. Learning how to be in a group with other kids and parents outside of mom and dad. Is this a must - no way. I think you will hear many pros and cons on both sides. I personally have always thought that some type of preschool/daycare after age 2 (part time, full time, whatever) is important for kids since socializing and following rules in a group setting is so important and learning how to listen to adults outside of Mom and Dad is so important. Even if your child attends classes with your nanny, it is very different when they are there without that main caregiver.

My niece and nephew are both very shy and when they started preschool at age 2 (my sister was a SAHM) part time, they really started to come out of their shells and the difference was really obvious. The things the kids learn educationally are things they can be taught at home by mom and dad and it is really more the social side for me at this age.

NandN2005 · February 2011

I don't think preschool is necessary at all at age 3. If it were my son, I would make sure though that he did get experience in group settings with other kids. It could be something during the day with his Nanny like a library program, music class, gymboree class etc. or some other class experience on the weekends with you. Both of my older kids are on the reserved side and I was really nervous when my oldest was right around 2 1/2 or so that she would never be able to handle being somewhere without me in a classroom setting (I'm a SAHM) because she was so clingy and reserved in new situations. I attempted to put her in preschool at 3, but it ended up not working out for other reasons. So we kept focusing on socialization through a attending weekly library program, MOPS every other week, and Sunday school weekly (she been doing all these things since since she was 2) and by 3 1/2 she was totally out of her shell. She's still timid in new situations and reserved (that's just the way she is) but she's much more comfortable joining in and taking part with others. My second daughter was much the same as her older sister. She now just 3 1/2 and my husband and I were just talking last night about how she also starting to come out her shell. Preschool is a great way to help kids get used to being apart from a parent or caregiver, but it certainly isn't the only way.

ArcticFox · February 2011

As a SAHM, I found it really valuable. Mostly things like interacting with other kids and getting used to things like schedule, other people disciplining them (like 3 teachers in the classroom or even unfamiliar faces like substitutes), sharing, that kind of thing. I wasn't so concerned about the learning part because DD is really smart and I do a lot to teach her, but there are also things I can't necessarily teach her, like waiting her turn with the 17 other kids at school, etc. I think it is also really important for my DD to have her own independent "thing" outside of the home.

Brina Bean · February 2011

While I am sure it is important to many children and parents, I can't say that I believe most children wouldn't grasp those social concepts just as easily over the course of one year as they would over two years of pre-school. Some children, yes. All children, no. It probably depends on your child's personality. I personally believe my oldest son does well in social settings because he is exposed to other children and adults very often throughout the week(non-family). He follows directions well even when I'm not around. It's just how he is, so I won't be sending him to pre-school until closer to age 4(though not solely for that reason). Good luck, whatever you decide.

howleyshell · February 2011

PT working mom with a nanny here.

We waited until age 4 to start our oldest in pre-school and even now he only goes 2 days a week.

He's done fine.

Neither I nor his teachers think he's missed anything by only having the 1 year of pre-school.

acppa · February 2011

DS is 3 and we put him in a pre-school for 5 hrs a week. The place we put him in is very nice with a lot of activities but not really what I would call focused on learning. I'm fine with that for now because I feel that he is primarily there for socialization, learning to follow rules, and listening to people other than his parents.

My plan is to get him into another pre-school that is more learning based in another year or so when he's 4 maybe 5.

Laroogirl · February 2011

We are planning on sending DS to preschool when he is 4. I don't really see the point of sending him for 2 years when he is developmentally on track and does well in social settings. He attends a structured Sunday school class weekly at our church as well as on Wednesday evenings. He doesn't go to daycare as we have a parttime nanny. Our nanny is an early childhood ed. major and does learning activities with him while the baby naps. I am not worried about DS only going for one year.

penguincrazy · February 2011

I put DD into a private preschool this year, and she's really enjoying it. I wouldn't say it's a must, but it is an opportunity for her to learn how to cooperate and follow the rules without me by her side. Not to mention, her school does some really neat stuff. Yesterday they made fish prints (painting on a real fish) and then dissected the fish and learned about it's heart, stomach, etc. They even saw what it ate last. She's gaining awesome skills too, like writing her name. It's a personal decision (and sacrifice since it is expensive), but I'm glad we made it.

xp: importance of pre-school for 3 year old?

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