February 2011 Moms

Cannot Stand DH Anymore!

I had a break down last night with DH and I just cannot stand him anymore right now.  This baby needs to come out soon! 

 I am going to vent for a minute if you'd like to listen...

This week was my first week of mat leave.  I am a preschool teacher (inclusive so I have kiddos with special needs too) and I just couldn't do the up, down, lifting, etc. anymore so I decided it was time to be done.  Well even before I was done with work I was the only one cleaning and cooking for some unknown reason.  DH gets off work and comes home to sit in front of the tv or on a video game on the computer.  I have to take care of DS and the house and cook dinner.  If I even hint at him doing anything to help he grumbles.  I know that right now I am not working but I am frickin 9mo pregnant and deal with a 3yr all day.  Is it so hard for him to switch over a load of laundry or put dishes away?!

 Last night I asked him if he would please clean up the kitchen after dinner (he didn't work yesterday) and he began grumbling about being so tired, yadda yadda!  I began crying because I was just so fed up with doing everything.  I go upstairs for my crying break down and he never once comes up to say anything and then decides to stay up until 2am on the computer!  Now he has to work today (so it will be all me again) and is acting like everything is fine this morning but yet still can't get away from the tv or computer!

 I am sorry to go on and on, I am just so fed up right now and I'm sure most of it is the hormones.  I just need this baby to come out already!  Thanks for listening :)

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Re: Cannot Stand DH Anymore!

  • Mine is similar. It's irritating to hear him complain about being tired when I was the one up with a newborn nursing 6times from 10pm til 7am. that's a LOT, and not a lot of sleep.
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  • I understand how you feel. My DH was great for about a week and a half from the time I went into labor. Now that he's back to work he thinks I should be fine doing everything I normally did plus take care of a newborn.  He actually said this morning "what is there to be overwhelmed about?"  Hang in there.  I'm sure he'll come to his senses eventually!
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  • Wow..hearing all of your stories make me want to say Thank you to my husband!  I have been on sick leave from work for 3 weeks and every night we make dinner together but then he does the dishes and cleans up.  Last night after work he scrubbed the floors on his hands and knees because I can no longer get down.  
  • I know!  We've been at each other's throats lately.  We seriously need to have sex to get rid of all the tension!!!  But I have no interest.
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  • Fellow PSE teacher here. ;) Wow. That sounds very frustrating and I would have to give him a piece of my mind if I were you. That's not right at all. How's he going to be when the baby gets here? Still expecting you to do everything and take care of a new LO? Lay down the law now, so he's aware of how you're feeling!
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  • I'm pretty sure it's not just hormones!  I think anyone would be upset about this whether they were pregnant or not.  I'm sorry you're going through this, and I hope that when you have two children, your husband will realize that he needs to step up and take more responsibility.  Otherwise, let him grumble, but I've found that asking is really the only way to get a man to do something.  My husband doesn't even "notice" things that need to be done unless I bring it to his attention, and a lot of what you said sounded so familiar.  Just don't give up and stop asking.  That's probably what he's hoping for, but you're 9 months pregnant and you deserve to have a little break before you're up all night!
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  • Dont feel alone!  I am ready to kick my DH to timbuckto!  Im due in 6 days but the doctors arent sure itll be that long.  I am still working (gotta love this economy) and am naturally a high stressed person trying not to be.  My DH does many similar things and has actually said some very hurtful grumbles to me.  I go upstairs as you do for my breakdowns.  He also has two SS that I tend to after school hours and I get out of work (he works normally 4-close shifts) but doesnt do ANY cleaning or help during the day.  I am still trying to balance my energy between the two kids work and chores ... I dont get it... maybe its how they cope... but know you arent alone!  
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