Frustrating :o(

ninafarina · February 2011

So shortly after we announced our pregnancy, a couple from our church who we get along with really well, announced that they were expecting too! They're due just about a month behind me, and it was so exciting knowing that I would have someone to share this experience with (first for both of us) Well other than one occassion, she has cancelled all the plans we have made to get together. The first couple of times I thought, no big deal, first tri was rough for her and I was more than willing to cut her all the slack she needed. Well its sort of come to the point of just chatting on the phone about passing milestones in the pregnancy and whatnot - no biggie. So last weeek she starts going on about how my due date is so close, we should get together for dinner before the baby arrives and then came the fun of finding a date we are all free. My H and I only have tues and weds nights together because of our schedules, she and her H have all nights together because they work a normal schedule, but they have packed their week with different baby classes and only have friday free, luck would have it that hubby got switched to day shift so friday was a go! I was so excited to get out of the house and spend the evening with them, so last night I called and left a message double checking that we were still on for dinner and what did they want us to bring etc, so today at work I have a Facebook message from her saying she has had a cold all week and is exhaused and we will need to reschedule!!!

I am so done with this nonsense - a facebook message to cancel? Not even the decency to pick up the phone?

I understand being exhausted, believe me, as I'm sure you all do as well, but here is the kicker, she is a teacher and she has had 3! snow days this week alone, I have to haul my blimp a88 to work regardless of weather, so I have been working every day.

It's all so frustrating, I would never cancel plans over facebook, especially not the morning of. I want to cut her some slack because of the pregnancy, but I am more pregnant than her and it makes me snarky that I do what I say, keep my plans etc.

Any suggestions for how to deal with her in the future? We have all kinds of plans for shared babywatching and things like that for after our girls are hear and we have to go back to work, should I just assume that none of this will come to pass?

Thanks for letting me get that out, hope everyones day is great

TofuMama7 · February 2011

I think next time she suggests getting together you should say "Sounds great, let me know where and when" Don't be the one who plans activities anymore because (in my opinion) that makes it more frustrating when she cancels. I'm sorry you have to deal with her.

GoMommy · February 2011

That would really bug me! Ugh, I'm to the point that when ppl CXL on me now, it really pisses me off (maybe its cuz I'm not getting out much anymore and so when I do have plans, I get excited about them). I would let her make the plans from now on, but I'd kinda expect them to cxl on you.. seems to be her pattern.

wishin&hopin2008 · February 2011

kristintho:
I think next time she suggests getting together you should say "Sounds great, let me know where and when" Don't be the one who plans activities anymore because (in my opinion) that makes it more frustrating when she cancels. I'm sorry you have to deal with her.

I agree with this- I had a friend that did this to me for months and I did just this- less frustrating and it will save your sanity.

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