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VBAC
Losing my faith- help needed
R/P from 3rd tri. I am being a wuss and was scared to post here.... 
~
I am supposed to be a VBAC. By choice. With full OB support. After my appt today, for the first time, I am considering scheduling a section for later this week. Since the option is there, it is all the sudden very appealing. I cannot believe I am even saying this. There are a lot of reasons to go either way, but the fact that I am 40 weeks and miserable to the ends of the earth doesn't help.
I don't even want to fathom how I am going to make this decision.
Ugh. Just thought I would share. I am a mess right now.
Here is my response to Iris, wondering what had happened today.
No, not really. I haven't had any progress. OB was very supportive in telling me my next steps. U/S on Friday, NST on Tuesday. Section would later be scheduled as close to 42 weeks as I wanted. Really open ended on my part. She also had to of course throw in "if ever you reach 'that' point, just tell me, and we'll schedule you at your convinence."
I think I am just losing faith in my body. Sounds dumb, but I really see myself going to 42 weeks and still having a section, then wondering why in the h I hadn't scheduled it earlier and saved myself a week or two of being totally miserable.
My pros are basically ease of care for DD1, and peace of mind for me that she is taken care of like I want her to be. (This has been in contention for a while. The ILs are taking care of her, but don't listen to what I request typically.) I want her life to be as normal as possible, so the transition is easier on her.
My cons are that I don't want the recovery, I know what to expect, so I am scared to go in there with all that knowledge, and I don't want sections for the rest of any other children I have.
At this point, I am still making the decision for myself, so that is a plus, rather than being forced.
I am gonna suck it up and repost on the VBAC board. I just feel guilty for some reason.
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Re: Losing my faith- help needed
I'm sorry to hear that your check-up today didn't yield more positive news. Maybe your little girl just needs to cook a bit longer.
I let my OB convince me to let him induce me due to possible pre-eclampsia and because I was so miserable at that point I let him talk me into it. Since DS was breech when he broke my water that led straight to my c/s. I often wonder if I had been more patient if DS would have flipped again in his own time. Maybe it was his way of saying I'm not ready yet. Remember that due dates are not perfectly calculated and as long as you and your LO are doing well then you still have a chance to go into labor on your own. Let your body have a chance to do what it can do and if it becomes necessary medically have the c/s. At least you'll know that you did everything you could to prevent it.
Also, just b/c you haven't progressed doesn't mean you won't. I had a friend who was at 3 cm for almost a month before she convinced the OB to induce her. I also had another friend who had no progression who went into spontaneous labor 48 hours after the doc said she was 0cm/0eff. I've decided when it's time for me to VBAC that I don't want any internal exams unless the doc can give me a good reason why they're necessary.
Good luck!
You sound just like my very good friend! She was due on the 25th, and with her 1st she went at 39 weeks, so she was kind of thinking she'd be early with this one too...not the case. So she's been waiting.....She was at 3 cm for days, no progress, etc. and was feeling like you- just getting down thinking her body wouldn't go into labor naturally, thinking she's "done" i.e. over the pregnancy and would probably end up having a section anyway. She reeeeallly wanted a VBAC.
Well, good news! She had contractions yesterday afternoon, she went in and they broke her water, she had the baby at 10:30pm- successful VBAC!
Hang in there- you probably won't regret going to 42 weeks, but you might regret the "what if" if you schedule a section for your reasons listed above. Who knows what will happen, but I just wanted to share my friend's experience since her story sounded similar.
This was exactly my thought. When I was laying in the OR getting sectioned, I remember saying, "if only I'd known I'd end up here anyway, I could have skipped three days of labor!" But the truth is, I have no regrets. Yes, it sucked completely to go through three days of labor, but if I had just signed up for a c/s, I'd spend my whole life wondering what could have been. And that's part of why I decided to try for VBAC the next time? so I wouldn't wonder if I could have done it!
After my c/s, I had to keep telling myself "at least I'm not in labor anymore." I still didn't feel *good* by any stretch. After my VBAC, within a couple of *minutes* of being stitched up, I stood up, walked around and realized I felt better than I had since getting pregnant. Nine months of misery? OVER. I don't know if anyone can hate being pregnant more than I do (I am not having any more kids because of it), but it was totally worth waiting for labor to have the whole mess DONE basically as soon as she was out! It feels like forever now, but when you're getting your short vaginal birth recovery, you're going to love yourself for waiting. Hang in there!!
I think it's very normal to feel like you are losing faith in your body, that there's no point in waiting anymore, that you just want it to be over. I'm worried that if you schedule a c/s now because you are feeling this way, that you might end up regretting it later. I wish I had held out longer at the end of my last pregnancy, instead of giving in to those feelings, and maybe I would have had the wonderful vaginal birth I'd hoped for. Or maybe not. Unfortunately there is no guarantee but you can still try to make it happen if that is what you want. Maybe you can find some successful VBAC birth stories from 40+ weeks to read and remind you that it's possible?
But only you can decide what is right for you. It's great that your doctor is on board either way and leaving the choice up to you. The most important thing is that you feel empowered to make the best choice for yourself, whether it's RCS or VBAC.
GL!
Oh and I don't want anyone to be scared to post here. I think everyone here would understand if you chose to have a c/s in the end. It's hard to be 9 months pregnant, especially if your EDD has come and gone.
We will support you in whatever choice you make.
I was in a similiar positon last week, full of doubt and question and wondering if waiting was worth it. I had little progress - then boom - I went into labor. (I will echo what so many people told me - sex and nipple stimulation!)
If I didn't have my VBAC, I would have felt the same way about why did I wait, etc. but the fact that i got it made it worth waiting. But my recovery has been wonderful in comparison to the "easy" c/s recovery I had. I came home from the hospital on Friday and sat down on the floor and played with my 2 year old. I never would have been able to do that with a section. I'm nursing my baby, which I doubt I would be doing if I had a section.
I know a VBAC isn't a guarantee, and the convenience of being able to schedule the day and have your baby is so tempting. But knowing what I do now, I would say wait and know you gave your body the chance.
Not scared perse! More just guilty for having those thoughts!
hey, seriously hang in there - chance is on your side that you will go into labor before 42 weeks. It is so, so hard being pg at the end, I know exactly how you feel - DS2 was definitely 41+ (if not 42, even) weeks, and those last few days were just miserable for me - I had a crying fit at least once a day, no joke. Adding the stress of planning a VBAC doesn't help things, either, but it *will* happen for you!
I guess really think about if you'd regret not giving yourself the longest amount of time possible to go into labor?
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)