Crisis averted (FB)

outlandartist · January 2011

Grandma almost outed me on Facebook. I know, who's G-ma is on facebook anyway? But she just posted something in response to my status update about going on a bike ride (safely on a dry, paved trail). And she said "Bike riding with my great grandbaby! OMG!!!" Thankfully I noticed on my iPhone and it was only up for 30 minutes with no replies.

I am not ready to come out on FB, I still have a couple friends I want to tell in person. I still don't know how I want to go about it.

Since we are on the subject, who's come out on Facebook and what clever way did you do it?

LyndseyLC · January 2011

I posted on FB after our first OB appointment at 10 weeks and 1 day. Our family and close friends already knew.

I said something like.."family and close friends already know but I can't hold it in any longer. I am pregnant,due July 18th. had 1st appointment today and heard HB".

ring_pop · January 2011

Honestly, I think at 18 weeks you just have to get over it and be prepared for people to find out. If you haven't had a chance to tell these particular friends in 18 weeks, maybe you should just email them and get it over with.

JennV514 · January 2011

A friend of my mom's did that to me last week. After the football game posted on my wall (for who knows what reason), "Don't get yourself worked up over a football game, it's not worth it". I immediately deleted it, and her a friend as well. Still had 5 messages in my inbox from people who saw it, though. I have no interest in coming out on facebook. I'm sure eventually there will be a picture of me big and pregnant somewhere, but there will be no announcement.

chocoholicchick · January 2011

I just uploaded the ultrasound pics from our NT scan. A lot of people saw it on their feed and the rest was history. Ditto pp that at 18wks, I think a lot of people will assume you told the world already. I would tell your friends soon if you really want to them personally before finding out through FB or somebody else. ETA: If you just don't want anyone to mention the pregnancy on FB, just deactivate your wall to avoid any mishaps. It's the best way to control what people say publicly on there.

noodles922 · January 2011

JennV514:
A friend of my mom's did that to me last week. After the football game posted on my wall (for who knows what reason), "Don't get yourself worked up over a football game, it's not worth it". I immediately deleted it, and her a friend as well. Still had 5 messages in my inbox from people who saw it, though. I have no interest in coming out on facebook. I'm sure eventually there will be a picture of me big and pregnant somewhere, but there will be no announcement.

How would that out you as being pregnant?

katie4253 · January 2011

I wouldn't be too upset with granny. 18 weeks is a long time to keep that secret!

JennV514 · January 2011

Actually, she wrote "it's not good for the baby" The quote in my original post was wrong. Sorry!

Mrs.Cords · January 2011

ring_pop:
Honestly, I think at 18 weeks you just have to get over it and be prepared for people to find out. If you haven't had a chance to tell these particular friends in 18 weeks, maybe you should just email them and get it over with.

This

noodles922 · January 2011

Ahh yes that might give it away Big Smile

I am not exactly telling people, but then again not deleting comments either. I don't really like drawing attention to myself so I just kind of let it spread itself. FI told EVERYONE he knew right after we found out, I live 3,000 miles from home and only told about 3 friends and my family. FI and I discussed putting it out on FB and decided that we would wait until the next ultrasound when we actually had a picture that looked like a baby, hopefully thats in about 3-4 weeks from now.

outlandartist · January 2011

You're right, 18 weeks seems a little late to be putting it off. There is just one more good friend to tell and it's my DH that insists on telling them in person. We've been trying to schedule dinner with them for 2 months!

ETA: We also were waiting for the amnio results, just got them a few days ago and everything's fine.

chocoholicchick · January 2011

We live hundreds and miles away from family and close friends, so we called and or sent a text to those we wanted to tell directly. Since you've been trying to reschedule for months, I would just call and tell them at this point. If they are close friends and you share mutual acquaintances, they are bound to hear soon.

abegailanne · January 2011

We've almost been outed a few times. We have just started telling people in the past week or so that are not close family and friends, and still not ready to put anything on Facebook. We did deactivate our walls after we told our immediate families at Christmas, and we rarely update our statuses but my SIL just had a baby and my DH posted some pics of him for family who couldn't come see him in person (SIL not on FB). TWO of his aunts commented with "Wait until it's your own baby!" and another said "Congrats Uncle.... or should I call you Daddy?" Fortunately, he saw them on his phone and deleted them right away.

I'm with PP, there are still some good friends we have not been able to tell yet so we wanted to share with them before letting the FB free-for-all begin.

As for a FB announcement, if we do anything at all, it may just be when we find out if we are having a boy or a girl.

Heather&Ben · January 2011

We told FB at about 12 weeks after telling family & close friends in person & on the phone...we knew it'd get out & thought it'd be more fun for us to make the announcement! We changed my profile pic to the u/s pic (8 wks u/s) & I wrote "And baby makes 3!" We immediately got a ton of comments!! It was so fun!

I am surprised at 18 wks you still have people you haven't told, if I were you I'd let them know b/c you are almost at the halfway point! That's just my opinion of course!

AsOctoberFalls · February 2011

noodles922:

I am not exactly telling people, but then again not deleting comments either. I don't really like drawing attention to myself so I just kind of let it spread itself.

I'm the same way. So far no one has posted on FB about it - they must all think it's a closely guarded secret or something. Big Smile

loiskoo · February 2011

I have an album named "365 days of marriage" where I take a picture of something significant that happened each day and I post it on facebook. Just a way to remind myself of how my first year of marriage was. This was the picture I posted.

Five_letter · February 2011

My grandmom is 80, she's on facebook.

If she really outted you she would have mentioned my grandbaby and my great grandbaby.

I don't think the post was that big of a deal.

jdm7 · February 2011

ring_pop:
Honestly, I think at 18 weeks you just have to get over it and be prepared for people to find out. If you haven't had a chance to tell these particular friends in 18 weeks, maybe you should just email them and get it over with.

This. And as far as the friends you've been trying to schedule dinner with for 2 months, just call and tell them. I find it a bit ridiculous that at 18weeks anyone would be keeping it hush, hush on FB. If people say things, people say things... I wouldn't be deleting friends/posts because someone commented on me being pregnant. Maybe at 6-12 weeks of pregnancy I'd delete posts, but not at the almost half-way point.

I didn't really announce that I was pregnant, I just alluded to it and if people figured it out, they figured it out. I don't really find it as big of a deal once you hit 2nd tri if people (who already know) are saying something on your FB about it. If you don't want people to comment the wrong way, then don't post status updates on FB.

boogerbearoriginal · February 2011

Five_letter:
My grandmom is 80, she's on facebook.
If she really outted you she would have mentioned my grandbaby and my great grandbaby.
I don't think the post was that big of a deal.

This.

And ditto Ring_Pop I'm not understanding how this is a 'crisis averted' type of scenario. At some point someone will mention it to other people - it's well past the point where most people keep it a secret.

cburitz · February 2011

On New Years, I posted "Happy New Years! Praying for a healthy baby this year and healthy niece and nephew!"

Five_letter · February 2011

JennV514:
Actually, she wrote "it's not good for the baby" The quote in my original post was wrong. Sorry!

You de-friended her over this? That's a bit harsh. Did you mention to her that you'd prefer if nothing was on facebook when you saw her recently?

That's really over reacting.

Five_letter · February 2011

AsOctoberFalls:
noodles922:

I am not exactly telling people, but then again not deleting comments either. I don't really like drawing attention to myself so I just kind of let it spread itself.
I'm the same way. So far no one has posted on FB about it - they must all think it's a closely guarded secret or something.

This has been my method so far as well.

KtGirl88 · February 2011

Crisis averted? your 18 weeks... if you are not showing then you will be soon so you might want to work on the "crisis" of people finding out.

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