Is it that odd ?? (re: LO's behavior at drop-off)

kyfirewife · January 2011

Any time I drop DD off at a new place (sitter, church nursery, whatever), even if she knew them well before, even if it's family - if it's the first time I actually drop her off to leave her there, she is in hysterics. And will be the first few times I drop her off to that person / location. Okay, by few times, I mean for a long while.

Example: Our current in-home provider we started using back in December, 3x a week. She's a friend of the family, so someone DD knows. Knew the house, knew her, knew her kids. Had played with her kids. But always with DH & I present.

Today - two months later - was the very first time she didn't throw a fit when I dropped her off. The first time she wasn't sobbing. The first time the provider didn't have to physically peel her off of me so I could get out the door.

Anywho... on several occasions - most recently when I attempted to drop her off in the nursery of a church we were visiting for the first time - I've gotten the same comment, in regards to her reaction:

"You must be a stay-at-home-mom."

Nope. Work full-time outside of the home. Have for years. Went back to work when she was 6 weeks old.

So, is it really that odd? For the child of a working mom, who doesn't have mommy home all day, to get that upset when mommy drops her off somewhere new?

Guess I'm just curious since I've gotten the same "SAHM" comment several times.

celiabwatson · January 2011

I don't have that particular drop off issue but I do notice that my son has his clingy moments. I think that he feels like he doesn't get enough time with me so when he thinks he's going to have time with me and then doesn't he gets mad. So, especially if you're leaving her there when previously you stayed with her, she might be feeling upset.

trinny · January 2011

I feel like my DD has gone through stages. Fortunately, we're in an easy one right now. But you do bring up an interesting point, I do assume SAHM sometimes depending on how kids or moms behave.

Ex. We were at the park and one kid heard my DD talking about riding on the dinosaur. He immediately ran over and started riding on it. The mom came over and said "NO! I can't believe he did that-- I'm so sorry! I think he heard your DD talking about it and just took it!" I was like-- yeah, happens every day! She seemed mortified that her child would do that. And I just assumed SAHM...

mrsgin03 · January 2011

I'm lucky that I don't have this issue but several of the kids at my kids' daycare do this, and do it for months/years. Most of these kids have gone to this daycare since they were babies, but there are some that just have a really hard time transitions. I think this is a fairly common thing and doesn't matter if the mom is SAH or working, I think it has more to do with the temperment of the child. As long as she's fine within a few minutes of you leaving, and the issue isn't that she really doesn't like the childcare for some reason, I wouldn't worry too much. Heck, I was concerned at points that my kids weren't attached to me enough, especially when my LO would barely say good-bye but would go running to her teacher when we got to school!

emberlee3 · January 2011

My son is the same way. When he moved to the toddler room at 12 months, it was at least 2 months of tearful drop-offs every single time. Now, he cries maybe 1/4 of the time. I have no idea why--he loves daycare and is in no hurry to leave when I get there to pick him up!

Leap08 · January 2011

I don't think it's odd or unusual. My daughter has days where she clings to me and sobs at drop-off (like this morning) and days where she is fine. There are other kids I see at daycare who cry every single morning. I think it just depends on the kid.

SMR924 · January 2011

Leap08:
I don't think it's odd or unusual. My daughter has days where she clings to me and sobs at drop-off (like this morning) and days where she is fine. There are other kids I see at daycare who cry every single morning. I think it just depends on the kid.

This!

brandenburdett · January 2011

Leap08:
I don't think it's odd or unusual. My daughter has days where she clings to me and sobs at drop-off (like this morning) and days where she is fine. There are other kids I see at daycare who cry every single morning. I think it just depends on the kid.

me too!

Soon2BMrsN · January 2011

My DS has been at the same daycare since mid-August and he still cries at least 3 out of the 5 days a week at drop-off. As soon as I leave, he's fine, and he is totally thriving in the environment there, so I don't know why he gets so upset.

Mominator · January 2011

My DS who will be 3 in April generally couldn't care less when I leave and he is a total Mama's boy. My DD who just turned 4 in November is a different story. Sometimes she is fine, but recently when I try to leave her anywhere other than her father's house she pitches a complete fit, like have to peel her off of me and run for the door. And like I said, she is 4 and freakishly strong LOL

luvmagoldn · January 2011

I really don't think it's unusual. My kids would be freaked out if I dropped them off when they were used to me and/or DH staying with them. Even now, one of the older boys has started getting really sad, sometimes crying, sometimes clinging when I leave for work and he's four. They've been home with our nanny for two years.

I think it does depend on the child and the various stages they go through.

Is it that odd ?? (re: LO's behavior at drop-off)

Re: Is it that odd ?? (re: LO's behavior at drop-off)

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